Taking a stand on polygamy.

"Polygamy rights is the next civil-rights battle," says Mark Henkel, who, as founder of the Christian evangelical polygamy organization TruthBearer.org, is at the forefront of the movement. His argument: if Heather can have two mommies, she should also be able to have two mommies and a daddy.

Here let me get my weight distributed evenly on this thin ice.

Okay I feel pretty stable.

I don't find anything particularly wrong with polygamy.

Is that sound I hear feminists sharpening their knives? Perhaps I should expand upon the above statement.

Whenever I have seen the news coverage of these polygamist religious groups I have been struck by the sort of vacant look in the eyes of the women. It appeared to me that they were living a life that they chose, or were coerced into, without truly understanding what all of the alternatives were. They were raised to believe that this was what God expected of them. I cannot support women being misled into embracing a lifestyle that might not be a good fit for their needs.

When I envision a poygamist union that would not raise any red flags with me, I visualize well educated individuals choosing an alternate lifestyle with the clear understanding of what the particular difficulties might be to make it successful.

I also do not envision this as being necessarily a one man, several women, scenario. It could be a one woman, several men, scenario. It could also be a man married to a few other men. Or a woman married to a few other women. It sounds complicated but who am I to judge?

I have no doubt that many of these unions would fail but so do as many as half of the current one man, one woman unions that we have today. Would there be a larger number of these more complicated marriages that fail? I have no way of knowing.

You see I don't have a moral blueprint that was handed to me when I was born. I have made my way through my life with an open mind which constantly learns new and different definitions for morality. Some I accept, others I reject. Those choices are what make me who I am. To some I would appear to be without morals. To others I am stiff and too often ruled by my ethics and sense of right and wrong. I try not to judge others, but admittedly I slip up occasionally. I am imperfect.

Now on a personal note I have been married twice. They both ended in divorce. So I am currently not a huge fan of marriage. However I still believe in love. I hope that all of you who visit here can you find that love, no matter what form it may take. If you are in a same-sex relationship then good for you! If you are in a BDSM relationship, more power to you! If you are in a traditional marriage and happy with it, awesome!

I would never deign to find you immoral or at fault unless you were taking advantage of somebody without the capacity to make the rational decision to be with you. I would hold accountable anybody who abused children. The same is true for those who would force themselves on women. If you like to get women drunk to get them into bed you are wrong! If you sexually harrass somebody for kicks you are wrong! If you take pictures of somebody and put them on the internet without that persons permission, you are wrong! If you, in any way, take advantage of somebody for sexual gratification you are wrong!

These are the guidelines that I live by. You're welcome to reject them or add your own. It is a free world. But try to always think of the other person's needs when you are looking for love. You might discover a more lasting love in this way.