You know I think the animals in Alaska are getting a little TOO comfortable with people.

Courtesy of Alaska Dispatch:  

A moose calf was born in the parking lot of an Anchorage Lowe's hardware store on Tuesday, to the delight of shoppers. 

"I just seen a brand new baby moose 15 minutes old born in a Lowes parking lot!!!" one onlooker posted on Facebook, along with several photos of the cow moose and newborn.

You know first we have a mama bear blocking traffic up the street from my house with her unruly cubs, and now we have moose mothers just birthing calves right on the edge of town.

It is like a damn critter day care around here.

The true story of the origin of the universe. So much more beautiful and awe inspiring than those imagined by the religions of man.

It's just a touch over eight minutes long, but do yourself a favor and sit through it sipping your coffee and just marvel at the magnificence of our beginnings.

And then afterward you can go through your day empowered with the knowledge that you are the universe searching to understand itself.

Since 1970 humans have wiped out fifty percent of the world's wildlife.

Walter J. Palmer showing off his machismo.

Courtesy of Vox:

In early July, a dentist from Minnesota named Walter James Palmer traveled to Zimbabwe, lured a male lion out of Hwange National Park, and shot him to death. The twist? This was no ordinary lion. No, Cecil the lion was a popular tourist attraction, and so now half the internet has erupted in outrage over his death. 

It's a grisly tale. But it's also not an isolated case. Not even close. Over the past four decades, humans have managed to kill off a staggering number of wild animals worldwide — from charismatic lions and rhinos right down to lowly frogs. Most of these deaths don't spark anywhere near the furor that Cecil's did. But they certainly add up. 

A major recent survey by the World Wildlife Fund estimated that the number of mammals, birds, reptiles, amphibians, and fish worldwide has declined a whopping 52 percent between 1970 and 2010. The main culprits? Humans. Mainly through hunting, fishing, deforestation, pollution, and other forms of habitat destruction. Statistically speaking, Cecil's death at the hands of a person was more likely than not.

When people refer to human beings as a cancer on this planet they could not be more accurate.

And the thing is that we know better, and yet we still cannot accept the responsibility of caring for the creatures whose lives are put into jeopardy by our very existence, much less by our need to demonstrate dominance over them.

I have to say that in this area my daughter is my moral superior, as she is a strict vegetarian who contributes time and money to conservation projects. Especially towards the protection of elephants who hold a special place in her heart.

We all have to do much, much better or else someday children will be learning about lions the same way that we all learned about the Dodo bird.

P.S. Speaking of big brave hunters killing animals the Zimbabwe officials are calling for the extradition of  Palmer to face charges for killing Cecil.

Teabagger who claims to be "homeschooling expert" says that sex education is a liberal plot to create more Democrats. Wait, what?

Marjorie Holsten thinks sex ed is a Democratic plot.

Courtesy of Raw Story:

A conservative activist, who has been billed as a homeschooling expert by tea party groups, warned over the weekend that sex-ed courses were a plot to increase the number of Democratic voters by destroying marriages. 

In an interview with radio host Jan Markell, Marjorie Holsten argued that the only way that schools could teach sexual education in the Common Core curriculum would be to waive obscenity laws in many states. 

“People say to me, why would they teach such awful things to our children?” she remarked. “If you go deep down and you connect those dots, you see that when children are desensitized to sexual things, that affects their ability at a later date to bond with a spouse.” 

“And so if you have somebody who can’t bond, they’re not going to have a stable marriage. When you have unstable, broken households, how do they vote? Democrat. So this has a very evil underlying intent.”

Okay I am really confused by this.

How does understanding how procreation works, and how to prevent pregnancy and STD's, change a person's political outlook?

Is this woman admitting that the only way to keep making new Republicans is to have ignorant teenagers popping out kids before they learn any better? After all teen moms don't usually make it to college, and remain undereducated for the rest of their lives.

So THAT'S their plan!

And just how does this woman expect children to learn about sex if they do not have the opportunity to learn about it in school?  

Oh, she has an answer for that?


“They should learn it the way I did, by watching animals do it on the street,” Williams joked. 

“Actually, that was how I taught my children,” Holsten admitted. “We started with a boy guinea pig…” 

“What? You taught your kids sex-ed with guinea pigs?” Williams interrupted. 

“Well, we had a boy and a girl guinea pig that clearly liked each other,” Holsten said. “You really couldn’t see anything because they’re big, furry little fuzzball things. I mean, that’s why there isn’t guinea pig porn movies.”

She does understand that there is some difference between how human beings make the beast with two backs, and how guinea pigs do it right? Or maybe she doesn't.

You don't think she does that squealing thing during.....never mind. 

By the way I have not yet done the Google search but I would not be so quick to suggest that there is NO guinea pig porn out there.

I know I'M not going to look, but it just might exist.

Little Luiz Antonio becomes a vegetarian right before our eyes.

Damn that made my eyes water. Must be a speck of dust or something.

Alaska Senator wants to have the state pay $100 for each sea otter murdered for being a nuisance. I guess there were no kittens around for him to stomp on.

"Wait, there's a bounty on who's head?"

Courtesy of ADN (Link was originally incorrect, but fixed now.):

An Alaska state senator is proposing a bounty on sea otters, the cute little marine mammals often seen by tourists swimming on their backs between cruise ships, sometimes munching on a fresh crab or clams. 

Sen. Bert Stedman, R-Sitka, sees the furry-faced critters as a growing threat to shellfish beds, particularly in southeast Alaska, where he is from. 

On Wednesday, he introduced legislation that would have the state pay $100 for each sea otter lawfully killed under the federal Marine Mammal Protection Act. 

"We're not talking eradication. We're talking slowing the population growth," he said. "In my opinion, we're not going to get any help from the federal government." 

Look I don't care if these little guys are walking up to this idiot and mugging him while holding a pistol to his head, you simply do NOT encourage people to massacre an animal as adorable as a sea otter.

What's next? Will he encourage people to punch pandas?

Or kick Koalas?

Or bitch slap baby bunnies?

But have no fear you sea otter fans you, as it turns out this is all an exercise in futility for Senator "I hate cute animals."

Even if the bill were to pass, it would be unenforceable under the federal law, said Bruce Woods, a spokesman for the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service. States cannot enforce laws or regulations related to the taking of any marine mammal under the law unless the Interior secretary transfers conservation and management authority to that state.

Well there you go again. Here come the Feds keeping Alaskans from exercising their rights to slaughter every creature that they find even slightly irritating.

Who could possibly support this kind of federal overreach?

Well yeah, I mean besides you guys?

Sadly this idea that we can simply slaughter any animal that becomes bothersome is built into Alaska's DNA. What was it that idiot said about Alaska's animals again?

Oh yeah:

"I always remind people from outside our state that there's plenty of room for all Alaska's animals -- right next to the mashed potatoes."

And this is why I do NOT participate in Black Friday shopping opportunities.

You know I remember watching nature videos of army ants swarming over vegetation and unfortunate insects, and rapidly devouring them completely. That had NOTHING on this.

It's scenes like this which reminds us just how uncivilized we can become under the right circumstances.

For fucks sake they're just phones!

(Source)

Good morning and welcome to your world.

There that should start your day off right.

Exotic animal massacre in Ohio senseless tragedy.

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

I heard bits and pieces of this throughout the day, but it was not until I sat down to watch Rachel that I heard the entire unbelievable story in its entirety.

I was surprised at my outrage and visceral response to the story.

I had always considered Jack Hanna to be a goofy animal handler who occasionally showed up on the Tonight Show, but his raw emotional response to this tragedy, really touched my heart and gave me new respect for a man who clearly has a deep and abiding love for our fellow creatures.

As I listened to his description, it sounded for all of the world like the plot to a low budget horror movie. Sadly this is one that was all too real, and one that led to a completely unnecessary loss of life.

Good news! Bristol and Levi have finally found the perfect way to serve beverages at their upcoming wedding!

And it will go just PERFECTLY with Levi and Tripp's matching camo vests!

Sorry, I saw this story on MSNBC this morning and I simply could not resist.

You just watch and  see if this doesn't catch on in Wasilla as soon as they get wind of it.

Of course "get wind of it" may not be the best marketing approach.

Confronted with evidence that homosexuality is prevalent within the animal kingdom a minister decides that, rather than being the natural order of things, these sinful creatures simply need to accept Jesus Christ as their Savior. All fixed!

Research scientist Vanessa Woods wrote about gay sex among Bonobo monkeys in Psychology Today:

I'll tell you this: I would swap every gadget I own - my car, my laptop, the potential to fly to the moon - if I could wake up as a bonobo. No bonobo has ever been seen to kill another bonobo. There is very little violence towards females. The infants get an idyllic childhood where they do nothing but hang out with their moms and get anything they want. There is plenty of food. Lots of sex.

Bonobos have gay sex. For bonobos, sex is a mechanism to reduce tension. And you can't talk about two females rubbing clitorises together until they orgasm in documentaries, intelligent design classes, or to right wing demographics who believe homosexuality is unnatural.

This rather provocative, yet well researched observation inspired a Baptist miniser to respond with this letter:

I believe that Scripture teaches that God created a perfect world. In this perfect world, man chose to disobey (sin), and brokenness and death entered into the world (Gen. 3, Rom. 5). We see it everyday on TV, newspapers, etc... You obviously alluded to a sense of brokenness in the article, as you mentioned violence & wars.

With sin, I believe what Scripture says, when it states that "all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." Not only are there individual sins, but also a corruption due to sin. One of these particular sins listed in Scripture is homosexuality. I single it out, only because of the implications of your research. I don't think it's worse than other sins, but neither have I departed from the traditional understanding of what Scripture teaches (ex: Rom. 1).

Here's why I find this article so thought-provoking.

I have a four-year old son named Owen who loves animals. He stays up at night with a flashlight looking through books in his bed, and says things like, "I'm doing research on whales." You guys would instantly connect :).

When I read your article about bonobos, I of course, thought of Owen. He would love them. But, I had to ask the question, "Am I comfortable with him learning about bonobos and their behaviors?" It's a good question for me to ask myself. If I'm honest, I would say my first reaction was to shield him from these animals because of their behavior. This wouldn't be uncharacteristic for us, since there are lots of animal behaviors that are difficult for a four-year old to understand (i.e. mating, violence, etc...). However, what's different about this particular behavior is that in an orthodox biblical position, homosexuality is a sin... but animals don't sin. We don't typically place animals in a moral category. In other words, they don't do righteous acts or unrighteous acts. So...what am I to make of these animals that engage in homosexual activity?

It seems to me that this behavior reveals a sense of brokenness in the natural world. Paul spoke of the unnaturalness of homosexuality, "men likewise gave up natural relations with women and were consumed with passion for one another, men committing shameless acts with men..."(Rom. 1:27). So, what he says is unnatural, now looks to be natural! But, just as natural disasters aren't normative, neither is homosexual activity within animals. The creation itself is marred with the effects of sin (i.e. death).

I think bonobos are fascinating creatures and still point to the creativity and beauty of God. However, it leads me to Romans 8, "For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of Him who subjected in hope that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies" (vv. 20-23).

Anchorage man charged with animal cruelty in case of trapping and killing neighbor's dog.

A man suspected of killing his neighbors' pet dog with an animal trap set on his front porch has been hit with cruelty to animals and illegal trapping charges, Anchorage police said Wednesda

Christian Kasprzyk, 41, faces the charges stemming from the death of Grizzly, a 4-year-old Rottweiler owned by Tony and Natalie Lazenby, on Nov. 26, police said.

Grizzly had been playing with another dog in front of the Lazenbys house that morning, the day before Thanksgiving, when at one point the dogs wandered off. Grizzly ran back minutes later, shrieking and thrashing wildly, his head locked in the death grip of a Victor Conibear 220 coil spring trap, police said.

Unable to remove the trap, the Lazenbys called the Anchorage Animal Care and Control Center, whose officers took Grizzly to a veterinarian. He died there a few hours later, his throat crushed.

Police have not released the reason Kasprzyk allegedly had the trap set on his porch, including whether he was targeting the dog or something else, though Parker noted the charges Kasprzyk is facing require criminal negligence.

Kasprzyk could not be reached for comment Wednesday night. He has been issued a citation pending an appearance in court, police said. If convicted, Kasprzyk faces a maximum of one year in jail and a $10,000 fine on each count.

This is a follow up to a very sad story that I originally posted on November 29th.

In that post I talked about Alaska's long history of trapping and the fur trade that is still celebrated with the Fur Rendezvous every February.

I called for an end to trapping in Alaska, as it seems to no longer serve any purpose other then to make men feel all "rugged and primal". And I stand by that sentiment.

But the truly important thing about this story is that it was a criminal act, which killed a beloved family pet, but could just as easily have badly injured or even killed somebody's child.

This Christian Kasprzyk, son of a bitch, placed a murderous device in an area where neighborhood children were playing, and it is only by happenstance that this poor dog stumbled upon it first.

A year in jail and a possible $10,000 fine just does not seem an adequate consequence for such a senseless act of violence.

Beloved family pet dies in agony. Is it time to revisit the idea of fur trapping in Alaska?

One minute a family dog named Grizzly was playing in front of the house, the next he was shrieking and thrashing wildly, a trap locked in a death grip around his head, his face distorted by the pressure and pain.

The 4-year-old Rottweiler, pet of Tony and Natalie Lazenby and loved by others in the neighborhood, died a couple of hours later, his throat crushed, the Lazenbys said.

It took four people to get the trap off the dead dog's head.

The Conibear 220 spring-loaded trap that killed the dog Wednesday is now in the hands of authorities. It's designed to kill foxes, beavers and coyotes. Dogs occasionally die in them, too, but typically while on hikes with their owners in wild places, and typically in areas open to trapping.

Now it is important to note that this animal did not die due to a simple accident.  This dog died because somebody set a trap specifically to kill it, or another dog just like him.  Traps set within city limits are strictly forbidden.

Reading the description of how this beautiful animal suffered before it died will tear at the heart of anybody with even an ounce of humanity.  Nothing should have to suffer like this in its final minutes of life.

Which brings me to yet another example of something Alaskan that I find personally repugnant.

I am not a Vegan or PETA member but I am a human. And as a intellectual, compassionate being I feel a certain connection to the creatures that I share this planet with.  I simply do not like to see anything suffer, and my own personal code of ethics dictate that I not injure or kill anything that does not pose a significant danger to myself or my loved ones.

Trapping in Alaska has a long and honored history.  We even have a parade and a week long celebration in its honor called the Fur Rondy. (Short for Fur Rendezvous) In the early days of Alaska's history trapping was much respected way of life, and for many settlers and natives the only way they could support themselves and their families during the harsh Alaskan winters.

However as technologies improved and other employment opportunities emerged, trapping was relegated to mere pastime for most Caucasians though it is still considered a necessary subsistence activity for Alaska natives.

My point is that in 2008 fur trapping is not something that the vast majority of Alaskans need to participate in to survive, and if it is done simply as a "sport" then it needs to come to an end. Hunters can brag about following a moose for many miles through swampy underbrush and finally getting that clean shot which ends its life abruptly and relatively painlessly.  But trappers certainly can make no such claims.  They know that the creatures who fall prey to their snares or traps suffer mightily in their final moments, and simply do not care. 

And if it is not something that is needed for survival then it is simply killing for the sake of killing. And it is done in the most brutal fashion imaginable.

I recognize that in nature predators devour prey, and that death in the wild is always brutal and filled with pain and fear.  I accept that reality.  I also understand that human beings are nothing more then self aware animals.  However if we are to really live up to our fullest potential it seems to me that we should endeavor to cause as little harm as possible to other living things and to find the most humane methods imaginable to harvest our food.  Trapping is in no way humane.  The animal caught in the snare or trap suffers horribly before it breathes its last.  To my mind, in an enlightened world,  that is indefensible.