Saturday, March 01, 2008

Well I for one am totally embarrassed for America.

Americans spend nearly three hours every week grooming themselves, but less than one hour on foreplay and sexual intercourse. It’s no wonder that only 46% of us describe our love lives as exciting, or existent for that matter.


On average, Americans spend 35 minutes on foreplay and sexual intercourse each session. And since we have sex once every 4.3 days, that averages out to about 57 minutes per week – 14 minutes below the global average.

Durex also revealed that Americans are having a lot less sex than just about everyone else in the world, and when we do, less than half are fully satisfied. Great job, U.S.


Americans have sex just 85 times a year (about once every 4.3 days), well below the global average of 103 times (about once every 3.5 days), with only the Japanese (48 times), residents of Hong Kong (82 times) and Nigerians (84 times) having less sex.

I could get all defensive and list all the ways that this does not pertain to me personally. But if you are somebody who I feel needs to be convinced, then trust me, you have already been convinced.

2 comments:

  1. somtimes these "clinical" findings are just so funny.

    "Sessions"???? hmmm ... sounds like some kind of homework or patriotic duty thing.

    On the "foreplay" finding, I have to take issue with the 35-minute finding because everything that happens after one "session" and before the next "session" is technically foreplay. Until the last session, the ultimate session, the and-then-you-die session. Up until then, there is always hope for one more session, I guess.

    And finally, I think everybody LIES to these researchers anyway, so I have serious doubts about their results. People all want to feel like they are normal (or above normal) in their habits -- and in the end, I guess they are, for what is normal for them, IS normal.

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  2. 3 hours a week grooming?

    Maybe back home in Los Angeles, on the westside this is true, but we have lived in Phoenix, Austin and now New York, and I would be surprised if Americans here spend 3 minutes a week on grooming.

    Since leaving California, I have seen some of the worst teeth, freakiest hair, and unkempt eyebrows, I ever knew existed.

    Someone famous said "Beauty isn't for sissies." It's true. I'm always yanking ear and nose hair out with my tweezers whilst watching TV. Of course, other areas of the body require trimming and shaving too (I will let your imagination connect the dots.)

    Which leads me to foreplay. After 15+ years together, foreplay isn't anything we usually need to get the party started so we just jump right on in and begin. Plus, I don't have anymore energy from all that grooming. *wink*

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