Morality is not determined by the church you attend nor the faith you embrace. It is determined by the quality of your character and the positive impact you have on those you meet along your journey
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Heartbreaking.
Alye Pollack, Connecticut teenager, victim of bullying, crying out for help.
Someone needs to send this to every academic institution in the nation because they are most liable for bullying. a lot of Teachers just don't care about anything other than collecting their paycheck and their summer vacation. That is fact in many scenarios. It's WAY too easy to become a teacher. These days one doesn't even have to be certifed for public school if the need is there. and the union is continually fucking up things and wont stop until a politician grows balls and goes after them.
Bullying happens, it's part of life. But punishment must be present as well
Gryphen, perhaps you might like to add those nice posts where Willow used some distasteful naming calling on a kid's facebook, all because he criticized Bristol's dancing on that lame TV show.
And then there is Todd, who is very good at bullying a school teacher in Homer for holding up a sign that said "Worst Governor Ever." Then, there is the incident in the Valdez airport where Todd bullied some guy for taking the picture of his former governor who loves to pose for pictures. Or, there are the tape recorded phone calls where Todd tried to muscle people into firing a former brother in law.
Parents, teachers, and other adults need to get involved. I work for ASD and see the bullying that goes on in elementary school. Needless to say, I step in when I see it (as do others I work with), and I listen to kids when they tell me they are being hurt or called names. Kids need to know they can ask for help and will receive it. Parents need to make it a point to ask their kids how things are going at school and get involved if their child is having a problem. Likewise, if their child is the bully, they need to act on that.
Kids can be quite vicious, as many of us remember from our own childhoods. But of course now there are many other and more destructive ways for bullies to torment their victims.
Adults, get involved. Stand up for your child and other people's children as well. Talk to your kids about bullying and the right and wrong way to resolve conflicts with other kids. Empower your children. Be a safe haven your child can come to. Be your child's best advocate.
These young bullies mirror what they experience at home and become bullies too. Its very sad to see what is happening across the country. With the internet, things are more in the open than they have ever been before. I'm sure this has been going on all along, but we just didn't hear about it until kids starting putting it on their Facebook pages and on You Tube. All I can say is thank God kids are letting us know, now what are we going to do about it? How do we help our kids?
anon 9:07 - there are good and bad in every profession. I am very involved in my community's schools and I see both, but everything cannot be blamed on teachers. Parents need to take some responsibility for their children's behavior as well. I've seen where the teachers and admin try to take care of these situations and the bully's parents come in screaming that nobody's gonna tell them how to raise their kids and it's just kids being kids, etc.
Where I live, the certifications and schooling required for teachers are quite high. Education does not always equal caring and compassion. Sometimes the unions do fuck things up, but sometimes it's the politicians who do.
This, like most other things in life is not so black and white. I believe that communication has top be improved dramatically - between parents and other parents, between teachers and parents, between schools and parents and between all of those and children. We need to have higher expectations of our children (in both academics and behavior) and they need to know what those expectations are and what will happen if those expectations are not met. And those consequences need to be consistent - no matter who the kid is or who the kid's parents are.
Hey look, teabagger alert @ 9:07...blames everyone including UNIONS for bullying problems. No dipshit, bullying begins at home, with parents who allow their children to get away with murder from the time they begin to walk and talk. You blame everyone else for your failures as a parent, hounding teach your children empathy, courtesy or basic human kindness, and expect a teacher to do it for you.
Yeah anon @ 9:07, blame the teachers and the unions. That makes a lot of sense. In these instances of bullying going on it's always instructive to look below the surface to see just why the victim is being bullied. But no, it's much easier to just climb aboard the pity bus.
The saddest part of this is, people like her usually grow up to be people like Sarah Palin and have learned to hate others who don't agree with them in order to get revenge. In fact they go through life hurting others and getting their revenge. Often justified in the name of religious devotion of course.
May I suggest that we send messages to the email posted in the top right of the screen (wordsdohurt@gmail.com)in support of this beautiful child?
This brought me to tears thinking about my own children. It is truly heartbreaking-almost inconceivable- to imagine what this girl is living,DAILY, for two years.
I am relieved that she feels empowered enough to have made this video- it seems to portend well of her strength & future. The bullies need some serious academic consequences. I do believe that kids must be living issues at home that cause them to want to intentionally hurt others. Unfortunately, those issues are unlikely to be addressed by anyone.
Internet bullying should concern school boards as much as on campus. The communities must press the school boards to enact policies which protect kids off campus, as well- the kids remain part to the academic community even when they are not on school property.
My older brother Kurt was one of the bullies in my small town growing up in rural NJ. My dad made him a bully by poor parenting and being heavy handed with us kids. The beatings were not as bad as the verbal and emotional abuse which still have scars to this day. We were never good enough.
Kurt ended up playing pro football for a short time until his drinking and lack of common sense put him in jail. Its kind of funny how we in America make superstars of some of the most dysfunctional anti-social bullies on the planet.
Tuff kids become role models in our American schools. "GO FIGHT WIN! KILL THEM! HIT THEM! TAKE THEM OUT OF THE GAME!" , are some of the common slogans our pretty cheerleaders shout out to the fans. We even have marching bands in total support and beer pubs that surrounds most top colleges. Now we are even getting women into the waring game. The Beer and Fleecing of the American public.
America is too drunk too care about Bulling. Our schools are too dysfunctional that take pride in the kill. This is how SP was schooled in the valley.
Teachers are the problem? Where do YOU leave that thay allow just anybody to teach? And then it is all the union's fault? This is pure BS.
Bullying HAS become a part oflife in America since the days of Ronald Reagan and the Moral Minority. George W. and his buddies perfected it. Demoralizing, dehumanizing, ridicule, and Criticism are all tools used by bullies. Were use to turn "liberal" into a dirty word. GW instisting that we were either with him or against him. This idea of my way or nothing at all as is being played out in Congress at this moment. This bullying had become a way of life and it is time to stop it not only in the schools, but in our leaders.
It is my opinion that these decades of bullying and verbal abuse from the right is why the democratic party appears so spineless...they - we - are victims of abuse.
I write this as a fifth grade teacher. I'm sitting at my computer at home after a long day at school. I spent my day trying to meet the needs of 5 distinct reading levels, including special ed. students who are woefully unsupported due to staff cuts. Many of my students do poorly because their parents won't tell then to turn off the TV/video games, and they don't do their homework or study. I also spent my planning time questioning students accused of bullying, contacting their parents to inform them that suspension would be next if it doesn't stop immediately. I had to come home to cook dinner for my own kids before I head out for carpool. When I return around 7:30 PM, a bag of papers to grade awaits me on the counter. I'll try to get them done while helping my own kids with homework, etc...My paycheck is fair compensation for what I do. Could I make more in another profession? Yes. But, I wouldn't get to make a difference in the way I do now. I put my heart and soul into my job, despite the hateful comments of people such as yourself. Your comments would infuriate me if I wasn't so spent from giving it my all since 7:15 this morning. Your ignorance is shameful.
Just looking in this girl's eyes, you can see the sadness. I can only hope her parents, teachers, and other responsible adults intervene. My youngest first cousin committed suicide at 16, and I only later learned that he was being bullied due to a learning disability. He hung himself at the school, and it saddens me to think of what his life might have been. He was a gentle, loving soul, and I can only wonder what if anything his parents did to help him.
Anon 9:07 - I am a teacher, and have been for the last 23 years. My school district has a good anti-bullying program in place, and reports of bullying are taken seriously. But kids who want to bully others are smart enough not to do it in front of a teacher. It often happens in the hallway, bathroom, or student parking lot. And if the student being picked on doesn't report it, nothing can be done. Kids have also taken bullying outside of the school building. They are doing their bullying from the comfort of their homes via their computers, cell phones, and other electronic devices.
Most schools are doing all they can to protect children from being bullied. But schools and teachers can't do everything. Parents need to play a much more active role in supervising their children's activities. Parents need to teach their children that they expect them to treat all people with respect and that there will be consequences if they don't.
Parents need to start acting like parents and stop expecting teachers to raise their children for them.
Been her, in a much less enlightened time when being bullied was considered my own problem, something I "brought upon myself." Bless Alye, I hope things get better, fast.
Horrifyingly enough, one of the pop-up ads at YouTube reads, "WHAT ATTRACTS MEN, Nine mistakes women make that men find unattractive."
Who gives a hang "what men find attractive" when a bullied adolescent is crying out for help? My guess would be that at least as many girls bully her as boys.
And I know, I know, there's little or no control over which pop-ups appear where, but somehow someone with a heart might make a point of not placing such victim-blaming ads aimed at vulnerable people in these locations...
Bullying models exist throughout our culture. Sarah Palin is a bully, Fox News is a bully, I am beginning to consider the Republican Party as a template for bullies. The Iraq War, Gun toting morons at political events...bullish and unreasonable behavior. Damaged people damaging people, without intervention and correction it is a cycle that continually repeats itself. Anonymous @9:07 bullying does not, as you say, just happen. That is an incredibly irresponsible and ignorant statement for you to make. But then to project blame for bullying onto teachers.....in your sanctimonious and admonishing tone.....Wow. Look to parents before you dare to raise a finger or your voice against teachers. I am not a teacher, but is it not reasonable to expect that when children arrive into their classrooms that parents have instilled in them the very basic and necessary skills required to function in a more social setting. Manners, personal control, and an ability to respect themselves and others. And how about a little excitement about the prospects of learning, for added measure.
Clearly you have issues with unions, have you ever belonged to one? Which clothe are you cut from, Corporations are God, or the bull shit school of self-reliance. If you work a 5 day work week, thank the unions. If you get paid over time, thank the unions. If your children are protected by child labor laws, thank a union. If your workplace is safe and not inhospitable to human needs, thank the unions. Many middle class families have a union to thank for reasonable wages, decent pensions and reasonable medical coverage. And if you are middle class and you didn't get there with the help of a union, you still owe them thanks. If you are a business owner, thank the unions for helping to sustain a middle class that ultimately helps to sustain your business. Thank the unions for supporting and protecting middle class families across this country, because as the ranks of the impoverished swell, the true costs to our society, which no one wants to talk about, impact us all. Destroy the middle class, and America will know her second revolution, but it will be the poor against the aristocracy. Unions are not the enemy.
Psychological trauma is very painful and can destroy people. Bullycide is suicide by someone who has been the victim of bullying. The effects are the same for children in school or adults in the workplace, in relationships, and from staff or other inmates in prisons. In the United States many health care practitioners like to blame the victim of bullying rather than the bullies which pushes many over the edge. It goes along with blaming the jobless for their situation when there is nothing a worker can do to change the economy or blaming the mentally ill for their behavior. We live in a very mean society where the worst among us end up in leadership roles. What those bullied need to know is they only come after you because you have a lot of positive characteristic they are either jealous of or threatened by. They use whatever characteristic they think you will feel bad about to attack you. In other words the bullies are the really sick ones in this situation, always realize this and let your light shine all the way through their dark souls.
Bullying starts at home, with parents who abdicate their responsibilities to teachers and then criticize them, cut their pay and benefits, demean them and expect them to work miracles with the awful little creatures these parents have raised.
My heart broke while watching this video. Alye is a very brave girl for posting this on Youtube, and I hope she gets the support she totally deserves.
But my heart also broke for myself. When I was a child my family moved to a small town. At my old school, I had to deal with a small amount of teasing. But at this new school, the bullying was so vicious, so hateful. I was called horrible names. I was pushed into lockers. I had spitball thrown in my hair.
No one came to my aid. No one stood up for me. And if I tried to defend myself, I was the problem, I probably "asked for it." There was no talk of how bullying can deeply affect a child and his/her education. And back in the 70s and 80s kids were expected to totally handle things on their own. Adults were too distracted.
I left soon after HS graduation, but the scars remain deeply embedded in my psyche. At 44, I think of myself as a deeply flawed human being. It's horrible.
Can teachers be a part of the bullying problem? Sure, in some cases. However, it starts in the home. The kids who bullied me weren't be raised by the nicest people in the world. Many of their parents were vindictive, uncaring and bigoted. So the apples didn't fall far from the trees.
Someone needs to send this to every academic institution in the nation because they are most liable for bullying. a lot of Teachers just don't care about anything other than collecting their paycheck and their summer vacation. That is fact in many scenarios. It's WAY too easy to become a teacher. These days one doesn't even have to be certifed for public school if the need is there. and the union is continually fucking up things and wont stop until a politician grows balls and goes after them.
ReplyDeleteBullying happens, it's part of life. But punishment must be present as well
ot
ReplyDeletehttp://www.salon.com/news/politics/war_room/2011/03/31/alaska_sharia_geller/index.html
That was powerful. Poetic. Riveting. That young lady has talent.
ReplyDeleteGryphen, perhaps you might like to add those nice posts where Willow used some distasteful naming calling on a kid's facebook, all because he criticized Bristol's dancing on that lame TV show.
ReplyDeleteAnd then there is Todd, who is very good at bullying a school teacher in Homer for holding up a sign that said "Worst Governor Ever." Then, there is the incident in the Valdez airport where Todd bullied some guy for taking the picture of his former governor who loves to pose for pictures. Or, there are the tape recorded phone calls where Todd tried to muscle people into firing a former brother in law.
Parents, teachers, and other adults need to get involved. I work for ASD and see the bullying that goes on in elementary school. Needless to say, I step in when I see it (as do others I work with), and I listen to kids when they tell me they are being hurt or called names. Kids need to know they can ask for help and will receive it. Parents need to make it a point to ask their kids how things are going at school and get involved if their child is having a problem. Likewise, if their child is the bully, they need to act on that.
ReplyDeleteKids can be quite vicious, as many of us remember from our own childhoods. But of course now there are many other and more destructive ways for bullies to torment their victims.
Adults, get involved. Stand up for your child and other people's children as well. Talk to your kids about bullying and the right and wrong way to resolve conflicts with other kids. Empower your children. Be a safe haven your child can come to. Be your child's best advocate.
These young bullies mirror what they experience at home and become bullies too. Its very sad to see what is happening across the country. With the internet, things are more in the open than they have ever been before. I'm sure this has been going on all along, but we just didn't hear about it until kids starting putting it on their Facebook pages and on You Tube. All I can say is thank God kids are letting us know, now what are we going to do about it? How do we help our kids?
ReplyDeleteanon 9:07 - there are good and bad in every profession. I am very involved in my community's schools and I see both, but everything cannot be blamed on teachers. Parents need to take some responsibility for their children's behavior as well. I've seen where the teachers and admin try to take care of these situations and the bully's parents come in screaming that nobody's gonna tell them how to raise their kids and it's just kids being kids, etc.
ReplyDeleteWhere I live, the certifications and schooling required for teachers are quite high. Education does not always equal caring and compassion. Sometimes the unions do fuck things up, but sometimes it's the politicians who do.
This, like most other things in life is not so black and white. I believe that communication has top be improved dramatically - between parents and other parents, between teachers and parents, between schools and parents and between all of those and children. We need to have higher expectations of our children (in both academics and behavior) and they need to know what those expectations are and what will happen if those expectations are not met. And those consequences need to be consistent - no matter who the kid is or who the kid's parents are.
Hey look, teabagger alert @ 9:07...blames everyone including UNIONS for bullying problems. No dipshit, bullying begins at home, with parents who allow their children to get away with murder from the time they begin to walk and talk. You blame everyone else for your failures as a parent, hounding teach your children empathy, courtesy or basic human kindness, and expect a teacher to do it for you.
ReplyDeleteYou make me sick.
anon@ 9:07 Where do you live? In my state you need a masters degree to become a teacher. That is not "way too easy".
ReplyDeleteYeah anon @ 9:07, blame the teachers and the unions. That makes a lot of sense. In these instances of bullying going on it's always instructive to look below the surface to see just why the victim is being bullied. But no, it's much easier to just climb aboard the pity bus.
ReplyDeleteThe saddest part of this is, people like her usually grow up to be people like Sarah Palin and have learned to hate others who don't agree with them in order to get revenge. In fact they go through life hurting others and getting their revenge. Often justified in the name of religious devotion of course.
May I suggest that we send messages to the email posted in the top right of the screen (wordsdohurt@gmail.com)in support of this beautiful child?
ReplyDeleteThis brought me to tears thinking about my own children. It is truly heartbreaking-almost inconceivable- to imagine what this girl is living,DAILY, for two years.
I am relieved that she feels empowered enough to have made this video- it seems to portend well of her strength & future. The bullies need some serious academic consequences. I do believe that kids must be living issues at home that cause them to want to intentionally hurt others. Unfortunately, those issues are unlikely to be addressed by anyone.
Internet bullying should concern school boards as much as on campus. The communities must press the school boards to enact policies which protect kids off campus, as well- the kids remain part to the academic community even when they are not on school property.
My older brother Kurt was one of the bullies in my small town growing up in rural NJ. My dad made him a bully by poor parenting and being heavy handed with us kids. The beatings were not as bad as the verbal and emotional abuse which still have scars to this day. We were never good enough.
ReplyDeleteKurt ended up playing pro football for a short time until his drinking and lack of common sense put him in jail. Its kind of funny how we in America make superstars of some of the most dysfunctional anti-social bullies on the planet.
Tuff kids become role models in our American schools. "GO FIGHT WIN! KILL THEM! HIT THEM! TAKE THEM OUT OF THE GAME!" , are some of the common slogans our pretty cheerleaders shout out to the fans. We even have marching bands in total support and beer pubs that surrounds most top colleges. Now we are even getting women into the waring game. The Beer and Fleecing of the American public.
America is too drunk too care about Bulling. Our schools are too dysfunctional that take pride in the kill. This is how SP was schooled in the valley.
Teachers are the problem? Where do YOU leave that thay allow just anybody to teach? And then it is all the union's fault? This is pure BS.
ReplyDeleteBullying HAS become a part oflife in America since the days of Ronald Reagan and the Moral Minority. George W. and his buddies perfected it. Demoralizing, dehumanizing, ridicule, and Criticism are all tools used by bullies. Were use to turn "liberal" into a dirty word. GW instisting that we were either with him or against him. This idea of my way or nothing at all as is being played out in Congress at this moment. This bullying had become a way of life and it is time to stop it not only in the schools, but in our leaders.
It is my opinion that these decades of bullying and verbal abuse from the right is why the democratic party appears so spineless...they - we - are victims of abuse.
Anon 9:07 AM...
ReplyDeleteI write this as a fifth grade teacher. I'm sitting at my computer at home after a long day at school. I spent my day trying to meet the needs of 5 distinct reading levels, including special ed. students who are woefully unsupported due to staff cuts. Many of my students do poorly because their parents won't tell then to turn off the TV/video games, and they don't do their homework or study. I also spent my planning time questioning students accused of bullying, contacting their parents to inform them that suspension would be next if it doesn't stop immediately. I had to come home to cook dinner for my own kids before I head out for carpool. When I return around 7:30 PM, a bag of papers to grade awaits me on the counter. I'll try to get them done while helping my own kids with homework, etc...My paycheck is fair compensation for what I do. Could I make more in another profession? Yes. But, I wouldn't get to make a difference in the way I do now. I put my heart and soul into my job, despite the hateful comments of people such as yourself.
Your comments would infuriate me if I wasn't so spent from giving it my all since 7:15 this morning. Your ignorance is shameful.
FireHorse66 -that's a great suggestion.
ReplyDeleteJust looking in this girl's eyes, you can see the sadness. I can only hope her parents, teachers, and other responsible adults intervene. My youngest first cousin committed suicide at 16, and I only later learned that he was being bullied due to a learning disability. He hung himself at the school, and it saddens me to think of what his life might have been. He was a gentle, loving soul, and I can only wonder what if anything his parents did to help him.
ReplyDeleteAnon 9:07 - I am a teacher, and have been for the last 23 years. My school district has a good anti-bullying program in place, and reports of bullying are taken seriously. But kids who want to bully others are smart enough not to do it in front of a teacher. It often happens in the hallway, bathroom, or student parking lot. And if the student being picked on doesn't report it, nothing can be done. Kids have also taken bullying outside of the school building. They are doing their bullying from the comfort of their homes via their computers, cell phones, and other electronic devices.
ReplyDeleteMost schools are doing all they can to protect children from being bullied. But schools and teachers can't do everything. Parents need to play a much more active role in supervising their children's activities. Parents need to teach their children that they expect them to treat all people with respect and that there will be consequences if they don't.
Parents need to start acting like parents and stop expecting teachers to raise their children for them.
Been her, in a much less enlightened time when being bullied was considered my own problem, something I "brought upon myself." Bless Alye, I hope things get better, fast.
ReplyDeleteHorrifyingly enough, one of the pop-up ads at YouTube reads, "WHAT ATTRACTS MEN, Nine mistakes women make that men find unattractive."
Who gives a hang "what men find attractive" when a bullied adolescent is crying out for help? My guess would be that at least as many girls bully her as boys.
And I know, I know, there's little or no control over which pop-ups appear where, but somehow someone with a heart might make a point of not placing such victim-blaming ads aimed at vulnerable people in these locations...
Bullying models exist throughout our culture. Sarah Palin is a bully, Fox News is a bully, I am beginning to consider the Republican Party as a template for bullies. The Iraq War, Gun toting morons at political events...bullish and unreasonable behavior. Damaged people damaging people, without intervention and correction it is a cycle that continually repeats itself. Anonymous @9:07 bullying does not, as you say, just happen. That is an incredibly irresponsible and ignorant statement for you to make. But then to project blame for bullying onto teachers.....in your sanctimonious and admonishing tone.....Wow. Look to parents before you dare to raise a finger or your voice against teachers. I am not a teacher, but is it not reasonable to expect that when children arrive into their classrooms that parents have instilled in them the very basic and necessary skills required to function in a more social setting. Manners, personal control, and an ability to respect themselves and others. And how about a little excitement about the prospects of learning, for added measure.
ReplyDeleteClearly you have issues with unions, have you ever belonged to one? Which clothe are you cut from, Corporations are God, or the bull shit school of self-reliance.
If you work a 5 day work week, thank the unions. If you get paid over time, thank the unions. If your children are protected by child labor laws, thank a union. If your workplace is safe and not inhospitable to human needs, thank the unions. Many middle class families have a union to thank for reasonable wages, decent pensions and reasonable medical coverage. And if you are middle class and you didn't get there with the help of a union, you still owe them thanks. If you are a business owner, thank the unions for helping to sustain a middle class that ultimately helps to sustain your business. Thank the unions for supporting and protecting middle class families across this country, because as the ranks of the impoverished swell, the true costs to our society, which no one wants to talk about, impact us all. Destroy the middle class, and America will know her second revolution, but it will be the poor against the aristocracy. Unions are not the enemy.
Sioux Sue
Psychological trauma is very painful and can destroy people. Bullycide is suicide by someone who has been the victim of bullying. The effects are the same for children in school or adults in the workplace, in relationships, and from staff or other inmates in prisons. In the United States many health care practitioners like to blame the victim of bullying rather than the bullies which pushes many over the edge. It goes along with blaming the jobless for their situation when there is nothing a worker can do to change the economy or blaming the mentally ill for their behavior. We live in a very mean society where the worst among us end up in leadership roles. What those bullied need to know is they only come after you because you have a lot of positive characteristic they are either jealous of or threatened by. They use whatever characteristic they think you will feel bad about to attack you. In other words the bullies are the really sick ones in this situation, always realize this and let your light shine all the way through their dark souls.
ReplyDelete@ anon 9:07
ReplyDeleteBullying starts at home, with parents who abdicate their responsibilities to teachers and then criticize them, cut their pay and benefits, demean them and expect them to work miracles with the awful little creatures these parents have raised.
My heart broke while watching this video. Alye is a very brave girl for posting this on Youtube, and I hope she gets the support she totally deserves.
ReplyDeleteBut my heart also broke for myself. When I was a child my family moved to a small town. At my old school, I had to deal with a small amount of teasing. But at this new school, the bullying was so vicious, so hateful. I was called horrible names. I was pushed into lockers. I had spitball thrown in my hair.
No one came to my aid. No one stood up for me. And if I tried to defend myself, I was the problem, I probably "asked for it." There was no talk of how bullying can deeply affect a child and his/her education. And back in the 70s and 80s kids were expected to totally handle things on their own. Adults were too distracted.
I left soon after HS graduation, but the scars remain deeply embedded in my psyche. At 44, I think of myself as a deeply flawed human being. It's horrible.
Can teachers be a part of the bullying problem? Sure, in some cases. However, it starts in the home. The kids who bullied me weren't be raised by the nicest people in the world. Many of their parents were vindictive, uncaring and bigoted. So the apples didn't fall far from the trees.
This video has now gone viral. Awesome news!
ReplyDelete