That sucking sound you hear is Sarah Palin attaching her collagen filled lips directly onto Donald Trump's chubby ass cheek.

Well we knew that after Trump said all of those diabetic shock inducing saccharine sweet things about Palin the other day that she would be fairly swooning in response.

And sure enough today she has decided to give "The Donald" a little reach around in return.

Now you will have to forgive that fact that I refuse to post this mooseshit in its entirety, but come on, a man can only take so much.

So here are a few of the high low lights: 

What a hoot to watch pundits clutching their pearls and whimpering for smelling salts aghast over the latest “shocking” thing Donald Trump said, while The Donald ignores them and continues to soar. Silly kingmakers just don't know what to make of this. Well, we do!

Is she kidding? The pundits and press literally love this guy!

In fact I think I have seen Jon Stewart have about three Trump induced orgasms on his show these last two weeks.

The elites are shocked by Trump’s dominance, but everyday Americans aren’t. Everywhere I’ve gone this summer, including motorsport events in Detroit full of fed up Joe Six-Pack Americans, the folks I meet commiserate about wussified slates of politicians, but then unsolicited, they whisper their appreciation for Trump because he has the guts to say it like it is.

I'm sorry "wussified slates of politicians?"

Trump diagnoses our problems as incompetent leadership. Who can argue with that? How many politicians promised to secure our borders? So, why aren’t they secured? How many politicians promised to grow American jobs? So, why did they vote for Obamatrade? Is it any wonder that Americans are telling status quo politicians, “You’re fired”?

Apparently she does not realize, or refuses to realize, that Trump is exactly like those other politicians, making promises that he has no way of actually keeping, and probably would not try to keep anyway.

Trump boasts about his wealth, and average Americans cheer him on. This is the secret the chattering classes will never get. Americans don’t begrudge wealth honestly earned. We celebrate it! 

"Honestly earned?" Boy somebody has not done the reading on Trump and his "honestly earned"  wealth have they?

It’s no surprise pundits and politicos are determined to destroy a candidacy they can't control or shape with their mere words. Expect marginalization of anyone speaking well of Trump's efforts. He’s a threat to the permanent political class. Non-traditional candidates always are because when they're in touch with the people, they show their guts and just do the right thing. They go rogue - and take flak from all sides. Some of us have the scars to prove that.

Ah, there it is. The always present shift from talking about them to talking about me, me, me!

Okay well now we just have to locate the thinly veiled sexual reference.....

Itty-bitty pundits thinking it's clever to mock Americans’ opinions are finding the joke is on them. Cozy in their seat of judgment, blowing each other’s horns, protected by a glass screen.

Ah, there it is.  Boy that was even more thinly veiled than usual.

Oops here comes my favorite part.

Anticipate more battering and bashing storms around Trump. It's still very early in the game; folks are keeping their powder try with candidate support but are quite happy Donald Trump is in the race. More power to you, Donald. Here’s to “Making America Great Again”!

Did you catch that? "Keeping their powder try?"

That is the kind of mistake you can expect when you tell your ghostwriter that due to a slow down in donations to SarahPAC you are going to have to cut her pay.

You know this whole flirting back and forth thing is really starting to play havoc with my gag reflex. It's kind of like watching your perverted elderly uncle trying to get a hand job from skeletal crack whore in a back alley.