Sunday, September 20, 2015

Doritos partners with "It Gets Better" campaign and the Right Wing loses their ever loving minds.

Nice right?

No not right.

Courtesy of Right Wing Watch:

The announcement yesterday that Doritos will soon release rainbow-colored chips to support the It Gets Better Project, which works towards preventing anti-LGBT bullying, naturally drew the ire of conservative pundits like John Nolte of Breitbart, who said that Doritos is flying the “colors of anti-Christian hate and oppression.” 

But Nolte’s protests pale in comparison to a column in the right-wing American Thinker by Ed Straker, which could be confused for parody. 

Straker writes that the new chips are “the perfect gateway snack to introduce children to the joys of homosexuality,” lamenting that nowadays “it’s perceived to be cool to push a specific sexual orientation on children.” 

Calling for a boycott of Doritos and all products from its parent company, Pepsi, Straker urges conservatives to “push other companies to launch pro-heterosexual campaigns” by, for example, persuading “a hot dog maker and a hot dog bun company to do a joint effort promoting man-woman relationships.” 

At this point I am not even sure how the folks at The Onion even manage to do their job anymore? 

I mean how do you parody a group that is already a parody of themselves?

You could quite literally report what they say word for word, and at the end simply ad "just kidding" and you would be seen as a comedic genius.

68 comments:

  1. Anonymous6:27 AM

    I think it is preposterous to believe that eating rainbow Doritos will introduce children to the joys of homosexuality. That said, I have a vehemently left wing relative who has actively pressured her only child to be gay, because the relative believes her special snowflake will grow up to be so politically influential that one more gay person will really teach right wingers such as Trump, Palin et al a lesson. My relative has not succeeded, illustrating that sexuality is not a choice.

    Extremism of any form is scary.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous7:29 AM

      Obviously crazy knows no political boundaries!

      Mildred

      Delete
    2. If you do have a relative "pressuring" a child to be gay, that is because your relative is deranged, not because your relative is "left wing."

      Delete
    3. Anonymous8:19 AM

      Make no mistake Liz, my relative is quite deranged, but Mildred is correct...crazy knows no political boundaries.

      Delete
    4. Anonymous8:28 AM

      More like just plain SICK FUCK! Sexual orientation is INATE. let all our children be human children and should be themselves. PERIOD!!

      Delete
    5. Anonymous9:08 AM

      I know an extreme person who is convinced world population will be threatened because now people will chose same sex relationships because it is legal to marry now. She rants people will have blood tests and be told if they are gay or not. She also believes people will opt for homosexual relationships because marriage between a woman and a man is difficult.

      Her conclusion is legalizing gay marriage will cause the demise of the human race and Obama is to blame for turning the country in the wrong direction.

      Delete
    6. Anonymous9:23 AM

      Laura Jane Grace, Miley Cyrus and Joan Jett perform Androgynous.
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZR6mM_zfxwE

      Delete
  2. Yes, I was laughing at that crowd myself last week.

    Of course, the rainbow chips were part of a fundraiser against teen suicide, and not sold on shelves. Plus, it only lasted until they ran through all 10,000 bags, which they did rather quickly.

    But it turned into something akin to an announcement of forced sodomy.

    Nobody got upset when Doritos forced that unnatural Cool Ranch lifestyle down everyone's throat.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous8:40 AM

      As I have often thought while eating Cool Ranch Doritos, "I wish I knew how to quit you!"

      Delete
    2. Anonymous9:11 AM

      For a ten dollar donation they gave a bag of these colored chips. Why were they not outraged about the Terra vegetable chips that are different colors? They have been sold for 16 years I know of.

      Delete
  3. Anonymous6:36 AM

    Since these are only available online, and since there are already red, purple, yellow and black chips on sale in stores, what is their problem? Kids don't know gay from sunflowers. They like chips. No one is indoctrinating children int his nation but the fundies, the Quiverfull cult, the Catholics and their friendly priests, and RW gunlovers. Where is the outrage over the cute little pink guns marketed for kids? Or, right. Guns don't kill. Rainbow chips do???

    ReplyDelete
  4. You rightly say, "I mean how do you parody a group that is already a parody of themselves?"

    It's why Jon Stewart quit -- he was "Ubered" by these idiots.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous7:28 AM

    “it’s perceived to be cool to push a specific sexual orientation on children.”
    --------------------
    Only the ignorant, which is very uncool, would think such a thing.

    Mildred

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous8:32 AM

      Mmmhmm!

      Delete
  6. Olivia7:33 AM

    It is wonderful to see multinational corporations, for whom profit is the only reason to exist, catering (or pandering) to the LGBTQ community.
    However anyone feels about the production and sale of rainbow colored foods, or gay family television ads, or any of the other equality based corporate decisions that make right wing heads explode, one fact is clear; corporations obviously see that there is more money to be made going in this direction than there will be in trying to coddle right wing sensitivities. They wouldn't do it otherwise.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This bodes well for other foods that can be played with to self-promote your company.

      Leave it to advertising to skewer regressive thinking, to make closed minds squirm.

      Delete
  7. Anonymous7:38 AM

    "You could quite literally report what they say word for word, and at the end simply ad "just kidding" and you would be seen as a comedic genius. "

    I.e. Tina Fey (2008) on SNL (minus the "just kidding")

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous9:05 AM

      That was my absolute favorite of all. Word for word, Tina nailed her.

      Delete
  8. Anonymous7:54 AM

    Mmmm. Doritos.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous8:36 AM

      I can't eat Doritos. To my nose, they smell like baby puke. Good for Doritos for doing this.

      Delete
  9. "You could quite literally report what they say word for word,"

    Kinda like what Tina Fey did with Palin!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous9:03 AM

      Yeah, and what was Her Heinous' response? That maybe Tina Fey should pay for her kids' braces from the money she made off of it. Witch with a capital B.

      Delete
    2. Anonymous2:57 AM

      Yes, as if Sarah couldn’t pay for her own kids’ braces. That very comment summed her up for me. She will never believe she has enough money.

      Delete
  10. Maybe I should have read the previous comment, ya think!!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Anonymous7:57 AM

    "for example, persuading “a hot dog maker and a hot dog bun company to do a joint effort promoting man-woman relationships.”

    And alsotoo the railroads with their trains and tunnels and all that....and no more male conservatives eating deep fried dick-on-a-stick things at fairs....just sayin'

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous8:43 AM

      And tacos, we must not forget the tacos! The Taco Bell slogan, "Make a run for the border" has new meaning!

      Delete
    2. hauksdottir9:22 AM

      Let's not forget Larry "wide stance" Craig and HIS hot dog stuck into a potato!

      The image I remember is 404'd, but this article will do:

      https://paxarcana.wordpress.com/2007/09/14/larry-craigs-wife-puts-his-weiner-in-potato/

      Delete
  12. Anonymous8:00 AM

    Deep, deep symbolism! Let's see, I think the hot dog symbolizes the penis. Is the bun the vagina? (eye roll)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous9:14 AM

      Their energy would be better invested in reinforcing and living their beliefs at home, in choice of friends and groups they belong to. It must suck to be delusional everyone is like them trying to force their ways on them.

      Delete
    2. Anonymous6:06 PM

      The part of the human body I have heard referred to as the buns is not the vagina. Both genders have 'em.

      Delete
  13. Anonymous8:14 AM

    All I do is laugh at the Right Wing's increasing mental decrepitude and inexorable decline. 10 more years--they're done. In the mean time enjoy the popcorn :)
    ~Canuck~

    ReplyDelete
  14. Anonymous8:22 AM

    AS a straight middle aged woman I do not find colored doritos a slam against my own sexuality at all. I am beginning to think all these evangelicals have very serious sexual and gender issues within themselves.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous8:38 AM

      Their leaders ramp up the hype and wringing of hands. Live,and let live.

      Delete
    2. Anonymous8:41 AM

      Their actions. The things they say. How could they NOT have issues? They still don't get it, do they?

      Delete
    3. Anonymous9:05 AM

      AH BINGO!!!!

      Delete
    4. Anonymous9:27 AM

      I'm straight and don't find them to be a slam either. But it is not politically correct to call them "colored" Doritos these days. In the future try to refer to them as "blue", "green", etc or be more specific about their ethnicity.

      I wish this blog was As funny as Wonkette.

      Delete
    5. Anonymous9:46 AM

      I'm sure that if you ask him nicely, 9:27, Gryphen will be glad to send you a refund.

      Delete
    6. Wonkette is funny, but soulless.

      Gryphen's blog has a soul..

      I value both, but Gryphen's blog plays an essential role in keeping me sane and grounded.

      Delete
    7. Anonymous11:28 AM

      Wonkette is self-described as "Vile Little Snark Mob," and they live up to it; a great read for those like me with a dry sense of humor.

      But you're right, Liz, Gryphen's got the soul.

      Delete
    8. Anonymous2:51 PM

      I think Wonkette has a soul. And a cute babby.

      Delete
    9. Anonymous5:19 PM

      Stop fighting! You're both pretty! As a daily reader of both blogs, I say they both have soul.

      Delete
    10. Anonymous9:30 PM

      I like wonkette better cause the speech is "freer" if you know what I mean. Gryphen just pays lip service to free speech.

      Delete
    11. Anonymous12:37 AM

      No, no. Wonkette doesn't allow comments. If you don't know what I mean, you haven't been reading it very long.

      Delete
  15. Anonymous8:24 AM

    As the local hotdog vender would say" we have Big Wieners and we have little weenies". The Right wing has turned into a bunch of little weenies. *Will that be with a bun,or not? Bareback?

    ReplyDelete
  16. Anonymous8:31 AM

    Why is it always about sex with the righties?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous9:07 AM

      Good question.

      Delete
    2. Anonymous9:07 AM

      Because EVERYTHING is about SEX, BULLYING and MONEY$$$$$$. in that order..
      It is just how each person fits in the chain.

      Delete
  17. Anonymous8:46 AM

    I have a fundie friend who swears that people are becoming gay simply to be trendy, since it is now "cool" to be gay! Seriously! I point out the bigotry and hate gays endure and argue that sexual preference is not a choice. I am determined to help her see the light.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous9:42 AM

      Maybe this friend is gay herself? Or possibly bisexual? Obviously her "straight" identification cannot be all that strong, if to her it is a choice.

      Delete
    2. Anonymous11:00 AM

      Interesting take. I don't know. She seems so repulsed by it all. Hmmmm.....

      Delete
    3. Anonymous12:06 PM

      Although I don't believe being gay is any more of a choice than being straight, what would be wrong with it if it WERE a choice? Why shouldn't you be able to choose your sexuality, if you could? To defend being gay by saying it's not a choice is essentially the same as saying that gays are stuck being gay, so don't penalize them any further.

      Delete
  18. Anonymous8:53 AM

    I could not care any less about what color Doritos are. All I care about today is that the Eagles beat the everlovin shit outta those Cowboy motherfuckers today. And I hope that soon Michael Sam will be the highest paid player in the NFL. That'll teach those right wing fundies a lesson!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous9:13 AM

      LOL! Touche.
      Too bad Sam stepped away from pro ball.

      Delete
  19. Sgt. Preston of the Yukon9:09 AM

    I wonder if those heterosexual hot dogs are circumcised.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Anonymous9:29 AM

    We've come a long way (in a very short time) from the Ellen/JC Penney kerfuffle.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Has anybody seen a pint of "I Dough, I Dough," Ben & Jerry's limited line container for their usual Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough ice cream?
    http://www.benjerry.com/values/issues-we-care-about/marriage-equality/i-dough-i-dough

    That's not even my favorite of their flavors, but I was going to buy one or two just to save the empties. I'm presuming the Food Lion in my little corner of Virginia, shins-deep in teabaggers, maybe chose not to take on the inevitable headache.

    Another thing, since I took over the family shopping and all short errands four years ago, I've noticed I can't count a random 20 license plates in my county before coming to one of those racist "Don't Tread On Me" ones.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Anonymous9:39 AM

    "Anti christian hate and oppression", lol.....they actually get their panties in a bunch over colored corn chips? God, what would they piss and moan about if they saw the picture my four year old granddaughter colored in of a brown,green,purple and blue unicorn with yellow hoofs....obviously she is worshiping the devil.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous12:07 PM

      The only way fundies know they're alive is when their panties are in a bunch.

      Delete
  23. Colored chips are an attack on you religion? What a fragile faith indeed.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Anonymous10:57 AM

    so will the ad explain why buns are 8 in a package and hot dogs are 10? cause the leftover dogs surely represent something, eh?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous4:34 PM

      Abstinence? Unless the candy isn't stiff, it ain't worth a fuck, Right Brissy???

      Delete
  25. Anonymous10:59 AM

    "You could quite literally report what they say word for word, and at the end simply ad "just kidding" and you would be seen as a comedic genius."

    I think Jon Stewart just couldn't stand doing this any more...

    ReplyDelete
  26. Anonymous2:53 PM

    “the perfect gateway snack to introduce children to the joys of homosexuality,”

    WTF????????????????

    ReplyDelete
  27. Anonymous4:31 PM

    Doritos are a "gateway" snack? The only cure are twinkies servng devil dogs. Since when is shoving a hot dog in a bun a strictly heterosexual activity? There are heterosexuals who partake in and approve of anal sex.
    The jokes just write themselves with these twisted pop tarts!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  28. I think this is great.

    Otherwise I would never eat them.

    First, there are the dyes used.

    Second, I'm sure they're all made from GMO corn and I'm trying to eliminate as much GMO and artificial ingredients from my diet as possible.

    But I am enjoying the floor show of all the conservative heads exploding.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Anonymous7:25 PM

    I'm no tinfoil hat teapster righty, but I would never purchase, or god forbid EAT, that shit. No marketing campaign is clever enough to convince me I need to buy, that shit.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Anonymous9:34 PM

    What is wrong with GMOs? That's what a nectarine is. I really don't get it.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Anonymous6:14 AM

    Anon 9:34, most people don't understand the process that farmers have used for thousands of years to select seed for the best possible crop outcome. Genetic manipulation is how we got all current foods made from grasses and flowering plants.

    ReplyDelete

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