Friday, December 25, 2015

Ho-Ho-Holy crap are we done with this Christmas thing yet?

(Just a family celebrating the conservative tradition of the showing of the firearms to ward off bad spirits and Democrats.)

I know I said earlier today that I love Christmas, and I do. Up to a point.

But right now I am all Jingle Belled the fuck out.

Sure it was fun at first. Visiting the family, opening the presents, bringing up embarrassing stories about my brother's past just to humiliate him.

All good.

But now I'm over it.

For one thing I had to drive all the way out to Palmer, where my mother and brother now live, which meant no holiday beverages. (Uncle Gryphen cannot afford a DUI on his spotless record.)

I'm not saying that drinking alcohol makes every thing better, because everybody already knows that drinking alcohol makes everything better. (Except child rearing of course, not that my father did not give it the old college try.)

Anyhow before I go all Grinch that stole Christmas and harsh everybody's mellow, let me just say that I had a lot of fun today. (You know as much fun as you can have without a drop of alcohol and your brother telling everybody that story about how you used to sing out loud to Bee Gees songs. By the way Too Much Heaven is a classic!)

I got a lot of nice gifts, gave more expensive ones to others so that I looked cool, and enjoyed my visit with my family.

Now I am back home contemplating the upcoming year.

And while I have literally no idea what is in store, I know that it will undoubtedly be a wild ride and I could not imagine a better group of people to share that experience with than all of you.

Happy Holidays! (That's right Fox News I said "Happy Holidays," bite me!)

43 comments:

  1. Anonymous4:36 PM

    Is that a parody Twitter account or real? I hope it's a joke, if not, tacky, tacky, tacky.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous5:14 PM

      It's a hilarious parody account :)

      Delete
    2. Their latest blogpost should clarify it for you nicely:
      http://www.eclectablog.com/2015/12/reminder-republicans-are-about-to-get-what-they-deserve-or-the-whole-enchilada.html

      Delete
    3. Anonymous7:35 PM

      The sight of the two little girls pointing their guns at another person makes my blood run cold, even if it's a joke.

      Delete
  2. Anonymous4:41 PM

    O/T

    There was a two alarm fire today at a mosque in Houston. I don't have a link handy but police are investigating it as possible arson. Sad.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous4:49 PM

      Those Evangelical Christian Domestic terrorists are at it again. What makes them any different than Muslim Jihadists? Oh, that's right, they don't have the courage/dedication to blow themselves up.

      Delete
    2. Anonymous7:20 PM

      4:49-- You forgot the essential difference. The Evangelicals belong to the RIGHT, TRUE religion, and the Muslims belong to the WRONG, FALSE one.

      (According to both, anyhow....the viewpoints are really pretty much interchangeable.)

      Delete
  3. Anonymous4:45 PM

    Nothing says peace on earth like kids holding automatic weapons. Christ would be so proud

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous7:18 PM

      Wouldn't He though.

      Delete
  4. Anonymous4:46 PM

    "Nobody gets too much heaven no more". Happy holidays, Gryphen.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous5:05 PM

    How on earth did the guy father so many children with such a small penis?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Happy Holidays, Gryphen; and to all of the fellow readers. It was a gift to find your website and get to know someone whose opinions, even if in some [rare] times I disagree with them, are worth reading, comment on, and display a sense of real journalism and intelligence. Happy Holidays!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous8:44 PM

      And great humor.

      Delete
  7. Anonymous5:12 PM

    I once had a cat that was a big fan of the Bee Gees, and it's true I worried about his taste. ;)

    Happy Holidays, Gryphen.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Anonymous5:13 PM

    What ever happened to "Peace on the Earth good will to men"? Jesus fucking Christ that is a scary picture,please tell me that is not real.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Maple7:24 PM

      It isn't! It's a send-up of that ridiculous Utah state senator who had her whole family dress up in red and guns.

      Delete
  9. Anonymous5:15 PM

    In that pic, there are two gun nozzles that i could track straight to a head shot.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Anonymous5:32 PM

    Each Christmas day I promise myself at least 1/2 hour where I drop the whole family thing into a black hole. Scrubbed the bathroom this year - absolute heaven.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous7:19 PM

      Are we related????

      Delete
    2. Anonymous4:29 AM

      I scrubbed the kitchen floor--it was great! Get out the cleaning supplies and get down on your hands and knees and everyone leaves you the hell alone! Fabulous freedom!

      Delete
  11. Anonymous5:37 PM

    The Bee Gees?! Bet you're thanking that God you don't believe in that there were no cellphone cameras or widespread Internet usage back then. I am 53 and know not a day goes by that I'm not grateful. Lol!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Anonymous5:39 PM

    Gryphen,
    Happy Holidays !
    You are a good man.
    Don't change.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous6:04 PM

      Darn straight he is!

      Delete
  13. Anonymous5:51 PM

    Gryph, that is the most introspective and personal and frankly emotional post from you ever. I hope you feel all the love we feel for you and all the effort you provide to bring down the worst example of a human ever. While most Alaskans are so afraid of the plains you stand stalwart alone as our only true link to the greatest scandal in recent political history. Peace, love and happiness. Grasshopper.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Anonymous5:53 PM

    Happy Holidays to you too! No Achohol...oh dear!!!!
    I'm north of Boston and I walked the beach barefoot!
    Santa brought spring for Christmas! I love it!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Anonymous6:00 PM

    Happy Holidays Gryphen! I've enjoyed your blog since 2007. Keep up the great work.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Anonymous6:05 PM

    Happy Festivus, Gryphen!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Anonymous6:15 PM

    Merry Holidays to you and yours. Gave my sweet Momma local honey with the comb. And gave my time. Best Christmas ever. Really, really grateful that I have more than enough stuff and delighted not to want more. Re gifting my favorite things to those I love.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year to you, Gryphen!

    ReplyDelete
  19. Anonymous6:59 PM

    Happy Holidays and a Happy New Year to you and yours, Uncle Gryphen!

    Happy Holidays and Happy New Year to all the IMers on here also, too!

    ReplyDelete
  20. Anonymous7:23 PM

    To borrow from Inigo Montoya: Peace on Earth. You keep using those words. I don't think they mean what you think they mean.

    RAinNC

    ReplyDelete
  21. Anonymous7:28 PM

    What's next is election year. It's an opportunity to make all these lunatics STFU. Get involved!

    ReplyDelete
  22. Anonymous8:36 PM

    What would we do without IM? Looking forward to great discussions on the political uncertainties this new year may bring.

    And of course the Palin saga will no doubt offer more discourse.

    Love your Christmas stories, G. Am feeling a sort of fatigue setting in, and like Clark Griswold would say, "I did it".

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What would we do without IM? Wasted less time checking in for the iceberg that was promised to sink Sarah Palin.

      Delete
  23. Happy Holidays to you too, Gryphen! Thank you for maintaining a little island of sanity while we're all on this wild ride.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Anonymous9:15 PM

    Merry Christmas Gryphen! and to all the Immoral Minority posters!A place to vent where sanity still reigns and Palins are shown for the low class hucksters they are, and pray to dog the majority sees this.

    Thank you. And have a happy New Year too!

    ReplyDelete
  25. It's the endless song, and you all know it will never be done.

    Whether you are all religious or all sciency, rest assured, the song goes on, one way or another.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Anonymous12:00 AM

    Gryph, you had a great Christmas, now have an even greater New Year! Love ya, guy!!

    ReplyDelete
  27. Anonymous1:09 AM

    Dearest Gryph,Thank you for being our voice when we can't find the words. Thank you for your strengths in not giving up. Looking forward to an interesting 2016!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hear-hear. And Happy Whatever! -- it works for the New Year's salutation as well.
      Whatever happens, we'll go through it together.
      Thanks for all you do, Gryph.

      Delete
  28. Anonymous10:46 AM

    That would be the perfect card for the Heaths and Palins to do.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Happy new year. Your dedication is appreciated.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Anita Winecooler4:08 PM

    Thanks, Gryphen, and whatever everyone celebrates, enjoy your time with the family. As annoying as it can be at times, if it makes one person happy or comforted, it's worth all the tongue biting and ribbing. I'm always reminded of mis- interpreting the italian word for potatoes (patane) for the italian word for "bad woman/prostitute) (potane) when I visited at thirteen. Every year it comes up, and the same people laugh hysterically.
    That photo, even as parody, is a reflection of today's mostly GOP propaganda. Unfortunately, it's "normal" for some folks.
    Good Health, good fortune and the time to enjoy it to you and your readers.

    ReplyDelete

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It just goes directly to their thighs.