Top Ten Technical Difficulties during Bush's Iraq Videoconference.

10. Too much background noise in Green Zone: IEDs going off in Baghdad.

9. Too much background noise at White House: Protesting Latinos and gays hopping mad.

8. By time Iraqi Cabinet introduced by conference operator, governing coalition’s just a myth.

7. By time Bush’s Cabinet introduced by conference operator, half have taken the Fifth.

6. During answer from Prime Minister al-Maliki, screen freezes and then goes blank.

5. During answer from leader of free world, he freezes and then goes blank.

4. Sound and video problems on Iraqi end: constant echo and picture grainy.

3. Only sound problems on U.S. end: Bush constantly echoes Cheney.

2. Delay in satellite transmission creates problem for al-Maliki: By time he utters progress is made, violent attacks up 10%.

1. Delay in satellite transmission creates problem for Bush: By time he utters progress is made, poll numbers down 10%.

(Hat tip to The Satirical Political Report)