No.1 Sarah Palin
We’ll be the first to admit that Sarah Palin can be construed as sexy, especially if you’re into that whole right-wing-extremist-who-loves-to-hunt-and-just-happens-to-look-like-a-porn-star-masquerading-as-a-librarian thing. Unfortunately Palin was given the gift of speech, and every time she opens her mouth to spew anti-Obama rhetoric, she adds at least one beer on the Molson scale (a determinant of how many beers need to be consumed before one beds her). Her much-maligned speech addressing the tragedy in Arizona -- in which she foolishly evoked the derogatory term “Blood Libel” in her own defense -- was the last straw. Don’t worry, Todd; we’re sure she picks up the checks.
This might even be more devastating to her future political career than the revelations that her husband would rather pay a prostitute to get him off than to risk getting his "tiny Todd" close the glacial chasm of the Grizzled Mama.
If Palin has lost her ability to give lonely men a chubby then what dos she have left to garner support for her 2012 campaign?
I mean it looks to me like the line to replace Todd in the Wasilla witches boudoir is virtually non-existent.
Where is Brad Hanson when you need him, huh Sarah?
That's surprising to me because she really is attractive. Maybe the outside isn't just a factor here but the inside as well?
ReplyDeleteAs far as her husband's possibly infidelities, I don't see how that is a fair argument that it will hurt Palin's plan to run. What will harm her chances in the end is the way she acts.
Closet queens like Oxy-Moron and Billie Kristol anointed this so-called woman "sexy," therefore outing themselves without ever saying a word. They gave her a status that no thinking het man ever would.. Playing a role is not easy for some people...
ReplyDeleteI have followed IM from the get-go, and don't mind snark at all, but I get really frustrated when you cross over into "give a lonely guy a chubby" territory.
ReplyDeleteIt's just counterproductive. If something big is about to blow, I would hate for little things to give new readers the wrong idea about what you've been doing here and the legitimacy of your sources and views.
"...than to risk getting his "tiny Todd" close the glacial chasm of the Grizzled Mama."
ReplyDeleteDon't do that to me this early in the morning!! Gonna take hours for the keyboard to dry out from the coffee spill. Too, too funny.
Besides, Ms. Sarah always reminded me of a closet dominatrix mommy figure, rather than the sexy librarian thing. Especially in the leather get-ups she flaunts.
And I'm in no way suggesting that this is probably what attracts the average male Palinbot.
**cough**
So do we think Bristol's going to pull a Chelsea Clinton and curtly say to a woman who asked if Bill destroys Hillary's credibility: "I don't think thats any of your business"
ReplyDeleteHoly dog, Gryphen.
ReplyDeleteI woke to that photo and it scared the sleep right out of me. Sarah seems to want to nibble on a tree. . . .
Normally, I dismiss this kind of thing as sexist--except that Sarah has been using her sexuality to get over her lack of substance and a lot of goofy assed men have bought into it. But the overall tone was accurate. Smart and sane is sexy. Sarah is neither.
2011 campaign?
ReplyDeleteWell shoot. They explained why Todd sees hookers.
ReplyDeleteDid Toad vote in this? Eagerly looking forward to the full disclosure from Wasilla about the ladies that entertain Toad, and why Tripp is such a popular name these days in the Palin famly. Bristol will be embarking on her new "career" in radio soon. Does she have a branch of her "consulting firm" in Arizona now?
ReplyDeleteFirst, I love that rabid beaver picture. Second, I'm sure that her "limp and impotent" remarks had something to do with her being #1. Remarks like that don't usually play well in the man crowd. Third, where's Brad Hanson? He's on his knees fervently thanking God that he isn't married to the Witch of Wasilla.
ReplyDeleteLikely already noted by someone but just in case:
ReplyDeletehttp://lubbockonline.com/local-news/2011-01-25/palin-gets-warm-reception-lubbock-christian-fundraiser
“I believe in Sarah Palin and what she represents for America,” said Linda Hunt of San Angelo, who won free tickets for the event. “Her enthusiasm, her love for America, her honesty and her core values of representing the people and not just special interests.”
I wonder how many free tickets they gave away...
Never thought she was sexy in the first place and could never figure out why men thought so - but seems like they are wising up.
ReplyDeleteAs a side note - no reason to insult witches by calling Palin one! We're actually very nice, love nature and respect others (the complete opposite of Palin!)
Sarah Failin - down and out in Wasilly Hillibilly Haven.
ReplyDeleteHa ha, even men find her repulsive now. Well no wonder, who would want a fried bologna sandwich 3 times a day.
She might be appealing all dressed to the nines, but that body of hers is ugly in shorts.
That was the only thing going for her. Pretty much sums it up. What are the chances that she feels the need to tweet about the SOTU tonight, esp if Michele B is giving her 1/2 cents worth?
ReplyDeleteYou notice you never see Sarah sporting any cleavage? Always those high-topped shirts or T-shirts. Never see her midriff either and very seldom her thighs. Know why?
ReplyDeleteI think it's because she's hiding all those little round bruises - from where guys keep touching her with ten-foot poles.
I wonder if Turd whispered sweet nothings in Ms. Tripp's ear? She might know all sorts of things!
ReplyDeleteCan I address the comments about Bristol addressing her father's alledged affair. NO article has come out about this. Bristol has never appeared or acted like she's angry at daddy. Quite the opposite actually. Levi said all the Palin girls are daddy's girls. Thats the onle reference to Bristol and Todd's relationship, other than when Bristol said on Greta (or maybe hannity) "ill never get over all the lies told about my mom, my siblings, my father"
ReplyDeleteThere's waaaay too much bullshit mixed in with the facts. It's hard to distinguigh because very little about the Palins has been confirmed true.
Immoral Minority is my first read every morning; your writing is terrific and your humor top tier. But the sexual comments are getting smarmy, over the line for me. I often send links to one of your posts to others., but lately haven't because my friends and family aren't comfortable with porno-visualizations. Just a comment. I'm old, love wacky humor, but not dirty talk. A generational thing. Your readers spans a spectrum, you can't please everybody.
ReplyDeleteIsnt Brad hanson still married? That would be the only relationship she couldve ended as that was her only alledged affair, even though there are many strong reasons to doubt it actually was a sexual affair, not just emotional
ReplyDeleteAnd please stop calling Bristol a whore. Just because she's sexually active with boyfriends doesnt make the interactions cheap. Before Levi she was a pretty good girl. THAT is fact
People predicted that the media would start attacking Todd and everyone associated with Sarah to bring her down. Look at what that says about them. Sarah and Todd have a good business relationship. They love their kids. I dont doubt they still love each other. I think they, like most teens who fall in love, are the victims of that circumstance. Like Bristol and Levi were. Teens who think they should marry young haven't had the chance to grow up or grow at all. Theyre too busy being rebellious little fuckers. When Levi said Bristol completely changed with the election, I say "DUH"
ReplyDeleteThat was the truest form of immaturity on his part. Levi to date still hasn't grown up or considered life alternatives to milking the Palin name for whats it's worth to him and SAdie is more lost than he is.
The comments from Palinbots are hysterical there. Everybody go comment to give the authors some support! The Bots are truly getting desperate and I can't wait for the new story to come out.
ReplyDeleteI just hope it REALLY gets covered by national news or it's just gossip.
Those poor c for peeers are delusional aren't they. They immediately dismissed it as a lie. One day just maybe they will get that they have been lied to and cheated out of their money.
Husky I agree with you. Gryphen sometimes in your attempts to be funny, it works and other times you come across as a misogynist.
ReplyDeleteI know the point you are trying to make--that some like her only for her looks, but sometimes it comes across as sexist. Not everyone who might read her know as much about her. And if you want the MSM to take these stories seriously, when you talk about her sexuality it is truly offensive to many. Shouldn't you focus more on whether she's fit for office? For those new to learning about Palin your story sounds like you are saying that because she doesn't give men a boner, her political career is over.
Think about how sexist that sounds to someone who is not as well acquainted with Sarah.
I'm sure others will disagree but I think you are forgetting how many new people are learning about who she REALLY is for the first time.
Anon 5:40.. How do you know all this? Do you know them personally? I think you are the person who goes to different blogs telling little fairy tales about how the Palins are a normal family. If you don't know them personally and are just makin stuff up to defend then, that's pretty crazy! No one here is buying your fairy tales of normalcy either.
ReplyDeleteBristol, Bristol, Bristol the Pistol as Grammy Palin calls her. Wanted to give a middle finger to America, uneducated, no husbanc yet, multiple partners, going on facebook for all the world to read and making dirty nasty comments to young kids.
ReplyDeleteOld enough to know better about being pregnant and having kids but refuses to be truthful to America and saying no sex while having multiple partners.
This girl needs an education and social skills badly but continues to grift the public while dressing like a 13 year old.
You love Bristol so much, well then tell her to get an education and a real job and quit polluting my tv screen and the radio.
So let's do the math:
ReplyDeletesubtract the Christians who take issue with her lifestyle, parenting and general non-Christian language and actions;
subtract the hunters and gun-fans she lost after that laughable fiasco on SPAK
subtract the educated who are offended by her stupidity
subtract the moderates (or really, anyone left of extreme nutty far right)
subtract the smart backroom pros who don't want to see her grab the party's primary and lose the general for them
and now subtract the horny old white guys?
She's got nuthin' - just the dregs of the unreasoning, uneducated, and/or zealot nut cases
I'm good with that
and now we're subtracting the
Maybe the "alcohol" wore off and they finally figured out she's not the "sexy librarian"; instead, she turned out to be a cold-hearted witch.
ReplyDeleteAnon 5:37 - "just because she (Bristol) is sexually active with boyfriends doesn't mean the interactions are cheap."!! Are you serious? What are they, meaningful?
ReplyDeleteShe, & her leather-clad mama are out
there touting Christian values, & Bristol is a spokesperson for abstinence, remember? She collects $$$
from Candies for (suppossedly) NOT
sleeping around. And, sorry, but her
reputation was anything but pristine before before she took up with Levy.
Her parents have failed their children & still try to pretend they're the Waltons. Take the blinders off. Not to mention Bristol
& her sister's foul mouths. They're
one big circus tent about to be blown over.
Sharon TN
A female point of view here. Sarah is in a no win situation. If there is indisputable evidence that Todd had sex with a HOOKER, and she stays with him, she is going to seem very weak. Women will be grossed out by the fact that Sarah forgave and stayed with Todd after he had sex with a prostitute. A husband having sex with a prostitute exposes a wife to all manner of STD's. He could be exposing her to AIDS. Who could forgive that?? Plus, it's humiliating for the wife - worse than if it was an affair. I don't know one woman who would stay with a husband who had sex with prostitutes. Will the citizens of the U.S. elect a woman president whose husband slept with hookers and looked the other way. I don't think so. Weak with zero self-esteem are not qualities people look for in a president. If Todd was having a love affair with a friend, then Sarah could be seen as a victim, but also as weak. Being a victim is not a good role for President. If Sarah does the right thing and divorces Todd, she will never be elected president. No way are the citizens of the United States ready to elect a DIVORCED SINGLE MOTHER as president. We are too conservative at this point in time.
ReplyDeleteanon @ 5:28 - read the GQ? feature on Todd. It has some interaction there between the Toad and the frog princesses.
ReplyDelete" Anonymous said...
ReplyDeleteIsnt Brad hanson... emotional
And please stop calling Bristol a whore. Just because she's sexually active with boyfriends doesnt make the interactions cheap. Before Levi she was a pretty good girl. THAT is fact
5:37 AM"
Stop calling Bristol a whore? Sarah that u? Or is this Grandma Palin or Grandma Heath? Is there a better word for girls like Bristol? The only difference between girls like Bristol and girls her daddy sees is just a matter of location. Bristol got a little money and cleaned up, but she is no rocket scientist. Like I said she just changed location. Bristol has nothing to offer society, just going along for the ride and the teabagging supporters of her mother gave her a lift.
anon @ 5:37
ReplyDeletehahahahaha
She was a sophomore going to prom with a senior (photos).
Reality (which Bristol is too stoopid or too interested in the $ to admit, although she did let it slip on Greta, once) yes teens will experiment. Good thing we have modern birth control- which she is now urging others not to use by implication. Too bad we don't have a way to hold her responsible for all the unwanted pregnancies she'll cause.
The alternative, is that she was a big time tease. Which sure stops working when the tease chunks up.
Husky and you other prudes - GROW UP. Sex is a part of life. And frankly, Gryphen is being very family friendly and creative with his euphemisms what was that? a chubby, tiny Todd, glacial gorge (would have sed crevass for consistency there Gryph. Good humor writing.
ReplyDeleteGryphen is not being crass or crude.
If you want false modesty and sanitized writing - I suggest you find some.....literature at your level - Run, Spot, Run.
if that picture came with sound effects Sister Sarah would say " hee haw hee haw". Makes me giggle every time
ReplyDelete5:53 - The difference you don't seem to grasp, is that sis a large part of what $carah depended on and consciously played on to attract voters.
ReplyDeleteThe same thing said about Hillary or Michelle Obama, or Olympia Snowe, or even Kay Hutchison (from what I know of her) would be offensive because they NEVER played that card.
With $carah, from the winks to the shoes to the vulgar derogatory emasculating sexual comments it was all about the sex appeal. So focusing on it now is ...$carah's comeuppance.
Well, I've been reading IM daily for a very long time, & I don't mind the snark. I enjoy it, actually.
ReplyDeleteI'm not a guy, but if I were, I wouldn't be interested in Sarah. Her nasty, shrill voice & the rat's nest atop her head would send me running as far away as possible.
As far a 2012, I don't think Sarah, & I'm very sure, Todd could never pass the vetting for security clearances.
Would you trust either of them with our state's secrets? Seriously! Especially Todd, who was a member of a group wanting to secede?
Anyway, the novelty of Sarah has grown old.
Denise (Michigan)
Sarah Palin is destined to go down as an embarrassing footnote in history, a laughing stock, and a running joke.
ReplyDeleteShe will be recalled as the poster child for Americans who lost their minds, their sensibilities and their taste (!!) as the result of trying economic and political times.
As the country recovers we will want to distance ourselves from everything that reminds us of this about of temporary insanity.
She has set the stage for her own personal apocolypse!
Anon 6:33- Prude? No- You're missing the point. I'm suggesting, rationally, that Gryphen and anyone else can pile on Sarah right now without even NEEDING to do what Palins do all the time, which is to hit below the belt.
ReplyDeleteBy questioning my reading ability, you're creating a false comparison between what I would consider "ill-timed crudity" and reading level/intelligence. I think many of us are on the same side here, and want Palin taken down. Right?
Anon 6:33 am, are you a man?? I'm guessing so.
ReplyDeleteThe comments don't have anything to do with sense of humor. I'm not offended because I've read IM for 2 plus years and follow Palin. But people new to the blog don't.
With so many important stories coming out soon, I think people are just worried that a blog that uses so much sexual language can't be taken seriously. I think the people commenting aren't prudes, I think they are feeling somewhat protective of Gryphen. We want Sarah OUT of politics! If the stories that are coming out are dismissed as tabloid garbage, that's a problem.
Having said all this, it's Gryphens blog and he can say what he wants. All the people who commented seem to be long time readers so they have a right to give their opinion then Gryph can decide. If it were my blog and I got 1 or 2 comments, I would blow it off. With more than that, I'd seriously think about what they are saying. Just saying!
Time for her Wasilla mayor strategy!
ReplyDeleteI think the sexual name calling is disgusting, and it makes you look petty, small and misogynistic. I've called you out on it before and I will again. This is no way for the father of a daughter to speak about women. I am a progressive woman who is against all forms of violence against women, including this sort of verbal sexual attack.
ReplyDeleteSharon TN,
ReplyDeleteI second that. I'm a 56 grandma. If my daughter had shacked up with 3 different guys (with a child no less!!) in a span of 6 months, I would have kicked her behind! I didn't have to worry though. I raised her to respect herself.
If someone doesn't want to be called a HO, they shouldn't act like one.
And for those who are so offended by Gryphen's humor.....then don't read it. See, now isn't that a simple solution?
Ohiovoter
I don't doubt this is the single piece of worse news SP has seen in a long time.
ReplyDeleteShe has slid by her whole life on being crowned "Miss Wasilla" and being able to charm whoever was in power into letting her have her way (before kicking them to the curb once their usefulness was over).
This is a serious blow. The closer she approaches menopause, the less power she will have to sway her bots.
(P.S. This is exactly the opposite of most women. With menopause many woman start to feel they have more power, not over others, but more power and say over their OWN life.)
She's no longer pretty because people have gotten to know her - she is onery, vindictive, has been proven to be a constant liar and has proven to be unethical by our Alaska Legislature.
ReplyDeleteI cannot imagine living inside her body or brain...she is one evil person and has reflected aging considerably during just the past two years.
7:29 You went overboard on your response. Obviously you don't know Palin as well as many others.
ReplyDeletePalin has used sex to get her places throughout her life and her looks and appeal are quickly fading. She has aged considerably and her inner spirit is not attractive - making her physcially unattractive. Simple as that!
As a mother of two with a dry sense of humor, I had not even heard of a chubby until today. I thought the creative reference was hilarious and appropriate seeing as though sexuality was the marketing theme and taking full advantage from being a woman was her shield of protection for her entire campaign. SP, herself, would call it satire. I call it "play with fire, you will get burned".
ReplyDelete6:22 You need to think or guess why Toad bought sex? Me thinks it is because sister Sarah is one cold fish and if she talks to him like she has referred to other men (during the past two years) - limp dicks, etc. - no wonder he went elsewhere.
ReplyDeleteShe's one tart - ugly inside and out!
3:00 No, Bristol will give them the finger and tell them to go to hell - we've already seen (read) and heard her do both! Not much class to that family!
ReplyDelete5:40 Levi is a good young man and is not living off the Palins. I'll wager he wishes he'd never gotten involved w/any of them. I know I wouldn't want to have lived his life during the past couple of years with Sarah, Todd and Bristol!
ReplyDeleteCannot imagine how horrible it was - he being young and having so much to learn about life.
Drop the period after the abbreviation of "number" and yo u get... Sarah is No 1. Seems fitting indeed.
ReplyDeleteThat porcine expression and BDSM outfit of hers says it all.
ReplyDeleteIt cracks me up when some say it "cheapens" the site to talk about what the palins and her nutty klan talk about all the time.
ReplyDeleteG said this is for the ones who would vote for her based on her delusional self-image of her being some sort of sex symbol. It's not like he made the shit up.
She isn't a serious candidate as far as her being intelligent, savvy, gentlewoman,etc enough to be any elected official. She is the one who thought she was some sort of beauty queen, parading her flat ass around and looking like a kookball.
She is a joke and should be treated as such.
Also I never saw the sexiness or the beauty that she and her sick followers brag about all the time.
Misogynist? I dunno. Mean? So what.
ReplyDeleteIf you don't like-
Just scroll on by then.
There is something to remember about the chubby squad.
Her horny male vote gets its info on Hot-R-Knot from the stall walls.
That is the survey result that will reveal the truth.
Troll central here today. Funny, whenever you post something about Palin's looks, the bots go nuts. That is the only thing that they really like her for. If she looked like Janet Reno, we wouldn't be here right now.
ReplyDeleteLook bots, there is more to being desirable than tons of makeup, bumpits and tight skirts. Some men actually like to talk to women. At least any man I would like to be around.
7:29
ReplyDeleteProgressive woman my ass.
To the trolls who think that the Toad's trysts won't be a factor in Palin's chance to run, I say bullshit. I believe that when it comes out that $arah DID have an extra maritial affair with Brad (the Hanson's did get a divorce), and that Toad may know that Track probably isn't his, and $arah's abortion ( that "wite out" story is ridiculous) was to hide another pregnancy, will.
ReplyDeleteBut, the funniest trolls are the ones who say that Bristol isn't a whore. You're right. She has graduated to being a prostitute since she gets paid to screw around now while preaching abstinence.
Why are trolls so threatened by the repulsion some have for Palin? She is emasculating.
ReplyDeleteAnother great photo of sister Sarah!!!
ReplyDelete...and yet, the Gristly Mama has the sole power to make it all go away with one unambiguous declaration:
ReplyDelete"I hereby state, and mean all that I say, that I never have been and never will be a candidate for President; that if nominated by either party, I should peremptorily decline; and even if unanimously elected I should decline to serve."
Scarah, with the almighty Zeus as my witness: if you promise to sit down and shut up, I promise to never ever ever never say another mean word about you or your entire white trash clan. You'll always be awful but you'll quickly fade from public awareness once your greed-fueled political charade is mercifully ended.
It's not your unique brand of incendiary, know-nothing, talking points-only politics that we despise, it's the unprecedented (un-presidented??? not since Bush, anyways...) arrogance that someone as unrelentingly inadequate as you would callously waste precious opportunities for meaningful public discourse in such troubled times just for personal financial gain. At least the equally inadequate Shrub did it for sinister political constituents who were, in turn, in it for personal financial gain!
You quit your elected position in Alaska claiming you couldn't stand the scrutiny and pressure from your vast legions of detractors. From here on out, the scrutiny and pressure is going to get a lot more intense...
"Before Levi she was a pretty good girl. THAT is fact"
ReplyDeletecan't help yourself, can ya'..... Bristol is as she always was. She is a party girl that likes her booze, drugs and sex. She may or may not know who the father is - she has an option of choosing.