Reporter Dana Milbank spent the other day following Mitt Romney around and reported on his strained attempts to connect with the little people.
Mitt Romney, the leading contender to become President Obama’s Republican opponent next year, had just finished working the room at Blake’s Creamery here when he paused for a photo with the restaurant’s owner, Ann Mirageas, and decided to tell her a joke.
“I saw the young man over there with eggs Benedict, with hollandaise sauce,” he said. “And I was going to suggest to you that you serve your eggs with hollandaise sauce in hubcaps. Because there’s no plates like chrome for the hollandaise.”
The proprietor laughed weakly. “Good luck to you,” Mirageas said.
WTF? Is this guy running for President, or is he a contestant on "The Gong Show."
And it did not get much better for Romney after that.
He talks about the weak economy with the proprietors of a feed shop, then abruptly pivots: “Okay, so what do you do about mosquito control? . . . This has been a mosquito-infested year with all the moisture. They flew away with my dog.”
At Mary Ann’s, a retro diner in Derry, N.H., the slogan on the owner’s shirt is “A blast from the past” — and the description suits Romney, too. He admires the Texaco “Fire Chief” gas pump and a jukebox (“You guys hear this music? ‘I want a caveman, I want a caveman.’ ”). Posing for a photo with his arms around the waitresses, he suddenly jumps forward, pretending somebody pinched his bottom. “Oh my goodness gracious!” he exclaims, then, “Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.” He later says the gag is “kind of fun to do.”
This last exchange, unfortunately for Romney, was caught on camera and broadcast on Hardball yesterday.
Perhaps this kind of thing plays well with the GOP base, who must still set bags of dog poop on fire on their neighbors doorstep before ringing the doorbell and running away, but this guy is looking to land a job representing ALL Americans. And some of us are not uptight humorless mannequins.
He manufactures come-on's by young, female potential constituents? Ewww.
ReplyDeleteI would love to think he IS too socially awkward to be president, but unfortunately he is probably not. He is going to be very tough to beat - as he is undoubtedly going to be the rep nominee. Obama will have his work cut out for him, beating what will certainly be seen as the "great white hope" - ugh, makes me sick to my stomach. That guy was our governor.
ReplyDeleteCharming, warm, natural, sophisticated, brilliant, kind, spontaneous, thoughtful, patient, focused -- if only there were a 2012 candidate with those attributes...oh, yeah! He's already doing the job.
ReplyDeleteWillard (yes that is his name) Romney is just swarmy.
ReplyDeleteCan you explain the joke to me about the hubcaps and the eggs and the chrome? I am totally lost.
ReplyDeleteThis is where you watch the events and feel embarrassment for the guy. I don't want that in office.
He's a good Mormon! Why is he manufacturing come-ons that might embarrass his voters? Did he feel a hard-on coming on or at least a flash of sex so he wanted to act out?
You are right. He shouldn't be the POTUS.
It's a dumb pun on there's no place like home- there's no plate like chrome.
DeleteI agree. He IS socially awkward. He can't help it, but even the tone of his voice is annoying. Doesn't inspire me in the slightest (never mind his politics).
ReplyDeleteOh my God..now that is funny!! Yes, he really does not have a clue how to talk to the little people. If you want a good laugh google Romney & the dog he took on vacation in a carrier on top of the car. YES..from Mass. to Michigan. He truly seems to have shit for brains...no common sense. Just an empty suit.
ReplyDeleteWow! Trying way too hard. Did he not learn anything in five years?
ReplyDeleteMitt, let me help you. The key to good comedy is timing.
ReplyDeleteYours is off by fifty years.
@6:42 Sorry if someone else already explained this: Home for the holidays or Chrome for the hollandaise. Yea, you probably had to be there.
ReplyDeleteEven more significant than his being "socially awkward" is his ideology, which is the same as that of the other 6 intellectual midgets who showed up at the dumbfest that is a weak excuse for a "debate." It doesn't matter who the GOP ultimately selects as their nominee. He or she will be trying to sell the same stinking pile of garbage, no matter how sane or rational he or she appears by comparison to the other candidates.
ReplyDeleteThey caught it on video? That's going to be Romney's equivalent of the Dean Scream. (Which I didn't think was so bad and I would have voted for Dean anyway. But it killed his nomination.)
ReplyDeleteWe all know, no g NO p has a chance of winning the Presidency, but there are very few legitimate contenders for the ticket. I don't understand why he's even running. He should have waited until 2016. Let Bachmann entertain the masses this go around. Why waste a viable 2016 candidate on a sure loss?
@6:41 Did you mean smarmy: revealing or marked by a smug, ingratiating, or false ernestness?. Okay, I like your new word swarmy too, kind of like warm and slimey so swarmy.
ReplyDeleteCool. ;-)
The GOP has no sense of humor. They just don't understand what is funny and what is not.
ReplyDeleteThe fact of the matter is that he is not electable as president. Nobody is going to want someone who has to wear special undergarments deciding if the button should be pushed or not.
ReplyDeleteThis was the year of "The Book of Mormon" on Broadway. THAT tells who what people really think about him.
The fake pinch thing is something my husband's pervy 75 y/o grandpa would have done--that is, when he wasn't trying to cop a feel.
ReplyDeleteMittens...shame on you! Next thing you know you will be drinking coffee and skipping Family Home Evening. BAD MORMON!
No wonder he lost out to McCain in the 2008 primary
ReplyDeleteAnon @ 6:50 AM..
ReplyDeleteI still don't get it. Is it an east coast thing...?
just swarmy.
ReplyDelete6:41 AM
I think you mean smarmy
Definition of SMARMY
1
: revealing or marked by a smug, ingratiating, or false earnestness ,a tone of smarmy self-satisfaction — New Yorker
2
: of low sleazy taste or quality smarmy eroticism
— smarm·i·ly adverb
— smarm·i·ness noun
See smarmy defined for English-language learners »
Examples of SMARMY
Yes, he's a smarmy know-it-all with the personality of a hall monitor, the kind of guy everyone hides from at a Christmas party. —Bill Simmons, ESPN, 2 Aug. 2004
I believe he will look awkward in the presence of Obama. I believe Obama can beat him. But, I am not convinced he will be the candidate. Remember the dog incident? He's a Mormon, also - that hasn't been focused on recently but it will be again.
ReplyDeleteWe are a split country. Yes a guy like Romney could get a bunch of votes simply because he is not Obama. But, when put up to closer scrutiny I think he wouldn't be that compelling a candidate. He won't wear well, imo.
(As awful as it would be, a big personality like a Trump or a Christie would probably make it harder on Obama.)
I hope other members of the media follow up on Rachel Maddow's investigation into possible voter fraud by Romney who declares his residence in Massachusetts is his son's basement and has not been seen in the area for at least two years. He reportedly lives full time in California, but votes in Mass. I think the description of him as "an empty suit" is most appropriate.
ReplyDeleteThe GOP keeps floating names out there with the help of MSM - including some on MSNBC - in hopes that there will be enough positive reaction from the public so the big guys can figure out who to trash or who to support.
ReplyDeleteRomney won't make the cut. Neither will Chris Christy, Huntsman, Pawlenty, or any of the "debaters" we just saw. My guess is that Rick Perry will be who the GOP / TeaParty will hang their hat on thinking he will appeal to the Fundies, TeaPartiers and that he would pull in Texas. And for a running mate? Probably Rubio to try to rope in the Hispanic vote and deliver Florida. Just saying...
Mitt Romney is too socially awkward to be the President of the American Socially Awkward Society.
ReplyDelete@sunshine, it's a horrible joke definitely not an east coast thing no wonder you don't get it. He's saying serve the hollandaise in hubcabs (made of chrome) because
ReplyDeletethere's no place like chrome for the hollandaise which is a play on words from a line in a Christmas song
there's no place like home for the holidays
again, horrible joke, Mitt is a stiff and a phony
6:55 AM - mlaiuppa
ReplyDeleteHoward Dean really did get a raw deal on that whole scream thing. He was shouting to a crowd so that they could hear him over the noise. If he was talking at a volume that sounded good on the television mic, he would have been inaudible to everyone that was there.
Luckily, he was a terrible candidate, so we didn't miss out on much.
I actually just watched the video. THAT IS ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING. What a slimy guy. Make me sick. I would not let him touch me.
ReplyDeleteHubcaps? Can't you just see him with the Queen?
ReplyDeleteAfter the dog being put on top of his car in a crate, I imagine it was relieved to be carried away by mosquitos!! What a dork. These jokes might go over with the country club crowd, but not with average citizens. How would he feel his butt being pinched if he was wearing his "magic undies"??
ReplyDeleteI want to know how he explains being a member of a religion that has done a complete assault against gays. Prop 8 in California was funded by Mormons in Utah. Who do these people think they are to tell other states how to live? He believes in states rights? Why couldn't they choose their own destiny? If he believes in states rights, how does he explain being a Mormon?
ReplyDeleteI wonder if it's not just a Mormon thang. One of my city editors at the newspaper where I worked as a reporter was a Mormon. He was very uptight morally, but really wanted to fit in so he'd try to joke around with us. Only his jokes were soooo groan-worthy. We'd always laugh, not because the jokes were funny but because they were so bad. He was very socially awkward, but I think Mormons are raised in such an artificial environment that it's hard for them to relate sometimes. I don't know enough about Romney's record to say whether he's got a chance, but I think he and Huntsman are a better alternative for the Republicans than the crazies like Bachmann and Cain and Gingrich. Pawlenty blew it in the debate and I don't see his campaign ever getting off the ground. The problem is that the real conservative Republicans will object to Romney and Huntman's Mormonism. I know a local teabagger who has already said she wouldn't vote for them because they "aren't Christian." The Republicans are too paranoid, judgmental and divided to even get behind a candidate that might have half a shot. Bad for them, good for us.
ReplyDelete"Palinosis" defined:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.opednews.com/articles/I-Regret-To-Inform-You-Tha-by-David-Michael-Gree-110614-539.html
My favorite socially awkward moment from 2008. At a Martin Luther King Day parade no less!
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FDwwAaVmnf4
Sad, real sad.
ReplyDeleteCan't wait to see him come to Utah and try something like that, to entertain and please any/all of the 'Goodie-Two-Shoe' Mormons!! Would probably not go over especially well.
ReplyDeleteBut, I would not be surprised if he gave it a try, just the same.
hahahaha
We should focus on Romney putting the family dog in a crate on the roof of his car and driving to Canada for a "family" vacation.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599,1638065,00.html
He's a spoiled rich brat like W with a hair stylist.
I hadn't seen much of this guy, til recently...first impression is that he's like the guy who your car salesman goes back to, to pretend to bounce your low offer, on.
ReplyDeleteIf you don't come around and get serious, he comes out of the back room and tries to play "good cop" on you, but you can tell he hasn't got a clue about you, the car, or business dealings in general.
He's the nephew of the dealership owner, is all.
Anon 6:50-- thanks!
ReplyDeleteWhen Mitt wants to tell a joke, he needs to. . . turn it off! Like a light switch! Turn it off! It's a nifty little Mormon trick! Treat those pesky feelings like a reading light!
Maybe they need to have him practice interacting with people in living room and restaurant set ups!
Aww, this is just sad. Poor guy. I feel like I am more than a little socially awkward, but I am Lil Wayne compared to Mittens. Put Romney up on a stage with Obama, and nobody under the age of 50 will vote GOP.
ReplyDeleteOuch! He'd better just forget the jokes.
ReplyDeleteChelsea Handler is half-Mormon, so there's at least one funny Mormon out there.
ReplyDeleteHas Weinergate taught male politicians nothing? This is not funny.
ReplyDeleteWillard Mitt Romney also may have committed a felony by claiming to live in his son's basement while owning homes in CA and NH. He did this to cast a vote for Scott Brown whose election could have been a voting machine miracle. I
ReplyDeleteIf nothing else we shoulds all refer to Mr. Romney as "Willard."
Another famous misfit named Willard:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Willard_%281971_film%29
It's a Mormon thing. MY best friend un high school told the same vein of lame jokes and cutsie-pie innuendo. Clean Mormon humor, but goofy.
ReplyDeleteThe real problem in this upcoming election is exactly the same as the Carter - Reagan election. Instead of Iran - Contra and making shady deals with terrorists to win the election and delay the release of the hostages, the republican corporate greedy types are delaying doing anything to help the economy including hire people in the U.S. in order to help a Republican win the White House. Different hostages; same concept.
ReplyDeleteI can't decide if Willard is a funnier name than Mitt, or the other way around.
ReplyDeleteThat has got to be one of the most uncomfortable manufactured laughs I've ever heard... But more in a creepy hey kids can you help me find my puppy kind of a way.
ReplyDeleteMittens should click his heels three times and chant: "there's no plates like chrome, there's no plates like chrome, there's no plates like chrome..."
ReplyDeleteWhat a dork.
Sad to say, he might well be the BEST that the GOP has to offer next year. He may be the biggest floater in the GOP toilet bowl, and thus their nominee, but he will NEVER get the votes of the fundagelicals who view Mormons as being ever so slightly better than cannibals.
To the Christian Dominionists, Mittens is an apostate worthy of stoning. Rather than settle for Mittens, they will vote for a third party candidate that has been anointed by God, someone like, wait for it...
Palin.
I predict that Palin will be the Party of God candidate for POTUS who will siphon off all of the fundie votes from the GOP.
This is a good thing.
As a GOP candidate, Palin would be out before the end of this year. She would be the target of all of the other GOP wannabes and she would auger in before the campaign season really heated up. However, as a third party candidate, she can ride her divisive idiocy all the way to Nov. 2012.
Can't you just see the debate in October of 2012? There on the dais is President Obama, Mittens, and of course, beady eyed Palin hopped up on a case of Red Bull. Mittens will be pretending that Palin or the president grabbed his ass, and Palin will be literally vibrating, with her eyes spinning counter-clockwise from all of the stimulants coursing through her veins, scared shitless that she will fuck up their names, referring instead to the Romulan or Alabama.
Mittens will plod on, wooden dork that he is, making lame ass jokes that in response will elicit minimal nervous laughter from some.
Palin will be spouting incomprehensible shit about how she's "ringin' bells, shootin' guns, and warnin' the other two candidates that I won't allow the Democrats to tax America's tea, or put tacks in our tea, or play tee-ball with tacks, or whatever unAmerican stuff they want us REAL Americans in REAL America to do, and also. And I'm a REAL Christian and not a Muslin or a Mammon."
Meanwhile, President Obama will be trying hard not to laugh out loud at his erstwhile opponents and wonder by what twist of fate he had been gifted with such feckless clods as rivals.
I think I'll start planning my Obama Inauguration Party 2012 now.
Don't worry, as soon as the Mormon church realizes that the gays have money, they will decide that gays can be Morman and will embrace them. Much as they did the African continent in 1978.
ReplyDeleteGiven what he did to Seamus, he really doesn't need to be making dog jokes.
ReplyDeleteYep, dorks are tedious but they far surpass mean, hateful bigots. I am in no way a supporter of Mitt, but at least the (awful) prospect of him as POTUS doesn't get me totally crazy. However, I, for one, plan to do all I can and donate as much as I can to guarantee that Barack Obama remains in the White House. Never has such a good and decent man been so reviled and disrespected. Why? Three guesses!!!
ReplyDeleteI've said it before -- Mitt Romney is basically Michael Scott from "The Office" come to life and given a campaign war chest. As Milbank points out, like Scott, Romney has hilarious struggles trying to connect with people:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/06/15/mitt-romney-unemployment_n_877431.html
And in MN the "I'm a mormon" ads continue to run unabated. Down home, mixed ethnicity, just like you and me. Sort of like if the Jonestown folk had run ads. "We don't wear tin foil hats". But they do drink the kool-aid (although my son tells me Kool-aid gets a bad rap since they actually used some cheap substitute
ReplyDeleteAnd the pretending to have your ass grabbed by on of two attractive young women? WTH is he thinking? I would LOVE to see him try that with QE. He'd be hauled off to the Tower of London, maybe he can find Sara there if she tries to crash the RR ceremony to get a photo op with Maggie
The dog story reminds me way too much of Vacation. That at least was intentional comedy
Nice, Gasman! (9:06)
ReplyDeleteI'm not going to read through the comments before I post this because I can't wait to see how many people thought the same thing...
ReplyDeleteGeorge McFly!!!
Remember that only Romney is ahead of the Tundra Turd in the GOP polls. If Romney drops by the wayside, look what's left!
ReplyDeleteI expect they will insert a dark horse late in the game, like Jeb Bush, Christie, or Rick Perry, none of which are good for the country. Remember, Obama is NOT a shoe in if the depression deepens. It WILL deepen if the GOP has it's way.
Hahaha. He's a funny guy. His joke reminds me of the time I went to Kennebunkport with my fraternity chums and we drank martinis on the deep, wide porch of my grand-dad's mansion, all the while shouting and whistling at the just-out-of-reach young misses who stayed stubbornly on the beach.
ReplyDeleteAh, to be young again. And relevant.
Gryphen
ReplyDeleteI know this is off topic for this post, but I thought you might be able to use it in another post.
This email at Aug.29 2008 is proof positive that Sarah let people write op-eds for her that she put her name on.
http://projects.nytimes.com/pa...
Here is the link for the magazine http://tinyurl.com/4yrmmnr
A man named Mark Kelsey wrote it for her. He worked in the Office of Economic Development
I have to admit I've started working the "fake pinch on the bottom" gag into my repertoire and I've gotten a pretty good reaction to it from my victims. Out of the 25 times I tried it today, I'd say 5 people laughed hysterically, 3 gave me dirty looks and 13 called me a douchebag, an asshole or a fuckwad. That's way better results than I get from the squirting fake flower, the can of springy snakes, the joy buzzer and the whoopie cushion I usually employ. And NOW maybe instead of "douchebag" they'll call me Mister President!
ReplyDeleteOh, btw, Romney's a douche.
I was so bored, I actually googled "Santorum" just for laughs.
ReplyDeleteSocially Awkward is putting it kindly, the man lives in his son's unfinished basement, that clip kind of explains why.
He reportedly lives full time in California, but votes in Mass.
ReplyDelete**
he spends summers in NH at the 5 house family compound on Lake Winnipesaukee. The homes are in his wife's name.