Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Far be it for me to tell anybody what to put on their sign, but is THIS really the best way to increase church attendance?


  1. The only thing that could have made this better would be to have "Jesus is coming" underneath that phrase.

  2. Anonymous2:20 AM

    Loved the cracked windshield that this picture was taken through..let me guess...Mississippi?

  3. London Bridges2:48 AM

    The next Sarah Palin ....


  4. otto katz4:06 AM

    Somebody better get their windshield fixed!

  5. WakeUpAmerica4:34 AM

    Holy crap! Is that your windshield, Gryphen? I hope it wasn't your head that cracked it.

  6. Anonymous5:06 AM

    If Jesus tried to enter me, I'd use Florida's Stand Your Ground Law to get him to step off!

  7. Anonymous5:07 AM

    Sounds like a typical come-on from a holy roller to a vulnerable parishioner.

  8. Anonymous5:17 AM

    I always had a feeling jesus was a perv

  9. Anonymous6:07 AM

    I think such churches know full well what they say - another way to abuse women - verbally if not physically.

    1. Anonymous9:32 AM

      why is it about women?

      I *HOPE* that the sign originally said something like:


      and the letters were stolen by some kids...

    2. Anonymous2:00 PM

      And then the kids centered the YOU?

    3. Anonymous9:33 PM

      Why not?

  10. Anonymous6:08 AM


  11. Anonymous6:10 AM

    OK, now I have the scene from The Exorcist movie, with Linda Blair and the crucifix , "Let Jesus fuck you, let jesus fuck you" stuck in my head.

    1. Anonymous7:14 AM

      Given what some so-called "Christians" have to say about the world, one would imagine that yes, many of them had indeed been fucked by Jesus.

    2. Anonymous9:32 AM



    3. Anonymous11:18 PM

      You can replace it with this, which is a little less nasty:


      "Given the sexualized imagery of St. Teresa's written account of the experience,[10] some critics have seen in the statue a depiction of physical orgasm; in particular, the body posture and facial expression of St. Teresa have caused some to assign her experience as one of climactic moment.[11] Jacques Lacan, for example, whilst discussing the female orgasm, said that "you only have to go and look at Bernini's statue in Rome to understand immediately that she's coming, there is no doubt about it." ("Encore," Sem. XX: 70-71) However, this sexual reading of the sculpture is not merely a modern, post-Christian, desacralizing view of Bernini's work: the sexual charge of the statue was noticed and condemned by at least one of Bernini's contemporaries (identity unknown), remarking that Bernini had "dragged that most pure Virgin down to the ground," while "transforming her into a Venus who was not only prostrate, but prostituted as well."[12] In his oration on Teresa's transverberation, Bernini's scholarly contemporary and friend, Agostino Mascardi, acknowledges in condemnatory fashion that there were those in his own day who indeed projected the sexual filth of their own profane imaginations unto the saint's mystical experience.[13]"

  12. Funny - I heard this coming from behind a fence when I was in Los Angeles: "Fuck me, Jesus! Fuck me!"

  13. Anonymous7:38 AM

    Gives a whole new meaning to the word “communion,” doesn’t it?

  14. This sign fits right in with the Bill Maher 'Stupid State in the Union" award trophy.. It's an award that depicts a person bending over and jamming their own head up their own a**.... PERFECT !!!

  15. Anonymous9:21 AM

    Gryphen, you might enjoy this:


  16. Anonymous9:35 AM

    Maybe it said:

    Let Jesus enter You(r Heart)

    and someone stole the letters?

  17. Anonymous9:39 AM

    From the movie, "Practical Magic":

    "She keeps going through all these guys!"

    "What she needs is a guy who will go through her".

    Or, something like that.

    It wasn't about getting the Great Beef Jerky, since she was already getting it every which way (and then some!);

    it was about finding someone who could touch your heart and your soul.

    kind of like, Jesus...

    But, yeah, no. This is SUPER FUN to CONSTANTLY bring up stuff that gets people to call Jesus a "perv" and such.

    Thanks, G!

  18. Anonymous9:43 AM


    You are an atheist, so you don't believe in God.

    Do you believe that Jesus existed?

    If not, I encourage you to do a lot more research and study, because it has been proven.

    If so, then do you believe that Jesus was COMPLETELY BAT SHIT INSANE?

    Because, let's face it ~ you Can't Have It Both Ways.

    Jesus said he was the Son of God. No other way to slice that.


    either you believe that Jesus was the Son of God (who doesn't exist, according to you),

    or you believe that Jesus was completely INSANE?

    I am terribly curious what you think; I hope you reply.


    Sarah Vs. Sarah

  19. Anonymous9:52 AM

    Totally O/T but did you read that Jan Brewer's PAC spent $2500 buying her crapbook, "Scorpions for Breakfast" on Amazon!


    And the Buffet rule was blocked. fuckers.

  20. Anonymous10:56 AM

    I am continually astounded by the ungrammatical, poorly spelled and comedic signs outside the fundy churches in Alaska. Go figure.

  21. Anita Winecooler5:47 PM

    Gtyphen, I love these sign posts! It always brings out answers much like this one:

    It can't possibly mean what is says, so it must have said something else and some kids stole some letters.

    It Originally Said "Pants half-off", and some kids stole letters from another sign and added them to it.

    That's my story, it covers all bases, and follows logic and the Bible. (except for the part that says "Thou shalt not steal letters or steal letters from another sign and add them to another sign, especially electrified signs"

    Because they didn't have electricity in Biblical Times. Burning Bushes, yeah, but Electricity no.

    Well, technically they did have lightening, which is a form of electricity.

    1. Anonymous9:39 PM

      I said I hoped that is what it originally said, because, quite frankly, it's clearer.

      But the message is obvious;

      Except to those with the mentality of a child.

      "covers logic and the Bible"?

      It IS logical, and the Bible was never mentioned.

    2. Anita Winecooler5:35 PM

      And I said:

      "Gtyphen, I love these sign posts! It always brings out answers much like this one:"

      The key operative words were "much" and "like". And the rest is basically what these posts usually get.

      I didn't mention you, whichever "Anonymous" you are.

      Where's your outrage or response to those who offended YOUR Jesus using foul, vile language?

      Oh, I suppose they have the "mentality of an Adult"


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