The most terrible lie ever told.

A few months back somebody accused me of being angry at Jesus, and that was why I was an Atheist. Of course that was so ridiculous, mostly because I have little faith that the Jesus of the Bible actually existed, that I did not bother to respond.

However that started me remembering back to the time when I was the MOST angry about religion.

It was when I was quite young and still working through my understanding of religion and what the purpose of the whole thing might be. As you might imagine from a child's perspective, my first thought was that it was a trick that parents played on their children.

It was also the beginning of my introduction to critical thinking. And it must be noted that all of this took place at a time in my life when I had little difficulty accepting the possibility that ESP, UFO's, and ghosts actually existed. In fact, to be fair, I sort of hoped that they did.

Now I was never told anything about Hell by my mother, and only learned about it when I started to question the existence of God.

Remember I was only seven years old, and in order to frighten me back into obedience I was told that those who "choose" not to believe in God and Heaven will forever be punished by pitchfork wielding demons, while hellfire burned the flesh from my bones for all eternity.  (Nobody bothered to explain how my soul, no longer encumbered with my earthly body, could have "flesh" to burn, but then again none of this seemed to be too carefully thought out.)

I pondered this information as I received it, but my follow up questions as to the location of Hell (And for that matter Heaven), were either ignored or rebuffed.

I remember devouring books about oil drilling and Volcanology assuming that if ANYBODY would stumble onto the entrance to Hell surely they would be the first.

But nothing was ever mentioned. Which to my young mind was insane. Why WOULDN'T we be looking for such and incredible place?

It did not take me too very long to determine that this place of eternal torture was a fantastical tale with no basis in reality. And with that realization came my first experience with rage.

I was to deal with my bad temper often in my life, but I did not usually get so angry that I could not be reasoned with or talked down, but this was one of those times.

How DARE they use such a horrible lie to bully children into submission! How dare they insert such terrifying imagery into our dreams! How dare they make us fear that the deaths of our loved ones will see them punished for all eternity, and perhaps worst yet, that WE may we forced to live forever while being separated from those we love but who failed to earn God's grace.

As if such a place as that could ever be called "Heaven."

What could be the excuse I wondered? Do the adults not know any better? Or do they know, and yet feel they have the right to lie to us because we are children? Or are they in fact as deluded as children themselves, and no longer worthy of my admiration and trust?

I fretted about this for months, refusing to go near a church or to talk to anybody about religion.

I remember being kept in from the playground because I frightened the other children with my talk about the possibility that there was no God.

"What is wrong with you young man? Have you lost your senses? Do you not fear God's wrath?"

"No, I don't. Is that why I must be kept indoors?"

I learned over time to stop talking about my thoughts on the playground. I learned in time to hide my anger from the adults. But I never learned in time to stop exercising my critical thinking skills, and I never again took anything on faith.

Sometimes I still get asked how I could have such disdain for religion, but the answer is quite simple. No idea which, to be successful, must be implanted in the minds of the young or ignorant, is worthy of my respect. Especially when it withers and dies so quickly when exposed to the light of reason.

As you can imagine I had a somewhat lonely childhood, as I was often isolated from others with only books for company. (Nobody wants their precious child to play with the neighborhood Satanist after all.) But ultimately I was rewarded when more and more started to openly express their animus toward religion and began to take great pride in their humanistic nature.

It is not so lonely anymore, and in fact I find that this newer generation is even further ahead of the curve than was I. And perhaps most gratifying of all is that when THEY have questions there are places that are ready and willing to answer them and help them through their journey.

THAT gives me great hope for the future.