Saturday, June 08, 2013

It's not about the nail.

It's Not About the Nail from Jason Headley on Vimeo.

As a man who has been married twice I cannot tell you how true I find this to be.

I literally once had a conversation with my second wife during which she complained bitterly about a co-worker and how this co-worker was not doing things the way my wife, her boss, was telling her to do them. This, she felt, was undermining her authority.

As the conversation continued I suddenly realized that my wife was completely wrong and found myself on the side of her co-worker who had solved a number of problems at the workplace by ignoring my wife.

The truly unfortunate thing for me was that my wife began to pick up on subtle body language cues that I was apparently giving off which indicated that I was not on her side, though I stayed silent on the issue. This caused her to become increasingly angry at me until ultimately the whole thing somehow became my fault.

It's not about the nail.

16 comments:

  1. Thanks for the chuckle.

    All the pieces are there, but no one checked the screws? No one torqued the nuts?

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    Replies
    1. Are you suggesting there's a screw loose somewhere in that video, you naughty person? -:)

      Delete
  2. WakeUpAmerica5:33 AM

    Gryphen,
    You obviously have a limited understanding of women, what with you being a man and what not. LOL If you haven't seen Tale of Two Brains, you must. It will greatly clarify things for you. BTW, as a woman, I can vouch for the accuracy of the description of the woman's brain. You will have to vouch for the man's.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3XjUFYxSxDk

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    Replies
    1. Anonymous6:35 AM

      Bullshit. Women's and men's brains, just like their physical strength and size vary more from woman to woman - a continuum - the to be a bifurcation with men's brains. It isn't a hard and fast rule.

      Delete
    2. Anonymous11:50 AM

      Thanks for the link. That was funny!

      Delete
    3. WakeUpAmerica10:50 PM

      Anonymous @6:35
      Did you leave your sense of humor in your underwear drawer?

      Delete
  3. Anonymous6:47 AM

    I am that man! Well, even though I am a woman. I have friends and family that hate when I try to point out what might be the problem, but only after they have ranted on about something that they can't figure out.

    I know sometimes we just want a sounding board, but I do think that is a term overused. That's for when you need a good GAAAAAAAAHHHHH!! But when I have someone going on and on to me about a problem, and I can see the possibility of an answer, I just tell them.

    And they usually hate me for it. :)

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  4. Anonymous9:30 AM

    Having only read your commentary and not viewed the video, I can say from supervisory experience that understanding and praising a person's strengths never undermines another's authority; it actually helps get the job done more efficiently and happily. People used to brag about working for me because our team always did well and was on time. And I'm a woman.

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  5. Yes, it is the nail. Anyone saying it's not is using what we've always derisively referred to as "female logic."

    To further alienate women, after many decades of living I refuse to deal with women whenever possible. Why? After a while, it's not about what is, it's all about hormones and emotion. IOW, female logic.

    Anecdotal? Yes. But that has been my experience, sorry to say. I want women to be totally and completely equal in all spheres. But, in my view, they generally keep fukking it up for themselves, especially in personal relationships. That video is relevatory!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Quel embarrassment! That should been "revelatory." Late, very late, onset dyslexia?

      Delete
    2. WakeUpAmerica10:52 PM

      Wow. Just wow. You need a dose of enlightenment.

      Delete
    3. I've had quite a few decades of enlightenment. And learned from them.

      Delete
  6. It IS about the Nail, AND the sweaters, AND the fuzziness in the head, AND THE RELATIONSHIP! It's about control, communication, and that damned Nail sticking out. The dance between men and women has to do with estrogen vs testosterone and the galaxy of misunderstanding in-between. If either gender has a monumental problem with understanding the other (and, really guys, we don't understand you any better than you understand us), then live a solitary life and be done with fighting. It isn't productive and we are all guilty of yelling and throwing up our hands in utter frustration. I am the more IT and mechanically inclined in my marriage and I can't understand why my husband can't see that what he tries to fix only makes more work for me when I have to repair it. His talent is persistence and in-your-face confrontation which gets me a lot of rebates that I wouldn't have had the chudspa to get for myself. We have made it through 29 years. Like making sausage, it wasn't pretty. We both have prior experience...I am his 4th wife and he is my 2nd husband. We have used the "D" word (divorce) more than a few times but decided that we were too old to change and no one else could put up with either of us at this stage. Don't worry about the Nails in either of your respective heads. Talk, argue and then have "make-up" sex.

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  7. Anita Winecooler12:50 PM

    Clever film! What I liked was the use of "We can work it out" by Stevie Wonder at the end. Brilliant!

    Yeah, the old men are from mars women are from venus theme, the bane of man's existence!

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  8. An European Viewpoint2:43 AM

    I don't get why the commenters make a "men vs women" issue out of this post.

    What I see is a couple with a clearly delusional one (that just happens to be the wife) and a sane one (that just happens to be the husband). How comenters readily jump on this to say that it's an accurate portrait of all females is disheartening.

    Really, Gryphen's readers ? "Female logic" ? That war or women is winning, then, if females humans are believed by y'all to be a different kind of beings from male humans.

    There is absolutely no more difference between a random male and a random female than what exists between two random males or between two random females. Understanding each other is hard - it's as stupid to make it a gender issue as making it a skin-color issue or a hetero/homo issue, or a left-handed/right-handed issue.

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    Replies
    1. WakeUpAmerica7:17 AM

      So true, yet the post was an opportunity for some funny stuff. If we can't laugh at ourselves, what do we have? You are so right about communication. The English language, complex as it is, is still a poor communication tool. Body language is essential and totally lost in today's world of electronic communication. I suspect that texting is responsible for more miscommunication than anything else.

      Delete

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