Monday, June 23, 2014

Missouri church raffles off two AR-15's in order to "get more people to follow Jesus." Because who doesn't equate the Prince of Peace with semi-automatic weaponry?

Courtesy of Freakout Nation:  

In Joplin, Missouri, a church is being criticized after raffling off two AR-15s during last week’s Father’s Day celebration in order to increase attendance and “get more people to follow Jesus.” The church is stroking guns for Jesus because we all know He carried a Glock. 

The church uploaded a video on YouTube to advertise the promotion. 

The lead pastor told the Joplin Globe “We’re just dudes,” adding, “If we can get more people to follow Jesus, I’ll give away 1,000 guns. I don’t care.”

You know one has to wonder if these idiots have EVER even read the Bible that they are supposedly preaching from. The fact that the religion supposedly inspired by the guy who said, "Put your sword back into its place; for all those who take up the sword shall perish by the sword," is now offering military style weapons in order to attract parishioners takes irony to a whole new level.

And is it just me or is this guy just about the most inarticulate pastor to ever preach from the pulpit?

He looks like some guy they recruited from their lawn maintenance crew to come in and say a few words about the Lord.

"Get your butts to church. If your late don't cry to me that you're a pansy and cannot set your alarm. Alright you're a big boy, you got big balls between your legs, your a dad right?"

You know it's almost like hearing Jesus speak directly to me.

11 comments:

  1. Anonymous2:37 PM

    hey moron America is not proud of you... you are an embarrassment to all of our sane citizens.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous4:46 PM

      RAFFLES

      Preacherman ain't GIVING shit away. You SELL tickets that pay for the guns. Aren't games of chance considered GAMBLING? AR-15s aren't exactly a cake or pie donated for a cake walk at the church carnival.

      Of course, Jesus would want one of them rifles for himself for when he goes out to eat at Chipotle's or when he has to run down to Target to get shampoo and conditioner.

      Delete
  2. Randall2:50 PM

    ...and his shirt says "DRINK UP"

    CLASSY

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous3:33 PM

    Ammosexual Second Amendmented Himself in the Head While Showing off His Gun (Video)

    ...Andrews handed the loaded gun to his friend, who at some point unloaded the gun so Andrews could show him its smooth cocking action. Andrews took the gun back and began repeatedly dry firing it — always the sign of a knowledgeable gun owner with utmost respect for his weapon.

    Andrews handed the gun back to his friend as the two walked to his vehicle to get out a second gun. Inside the vehicle, retrieving the second gun, he never noticed his co-worker re-load the first one. He took the now-loaded gun back, and set it on the passenger seat while they talked about the second one.

    As fate would have it, two more friends showed up, and the group began to chat.

    Some time later, Andrews picked the now-loaded gun up off the passenger seat. Jokingly, smiling, he pushed the tip against his temple.

    http://aattp.org/ammosexual-raymond-andrews-second-amendmented-himself-in-the-head-while-showing-off-his-gun/

    ‘I Don’t Care About Your Dead Children’

    This is a person who should not, under any circumstances, be allowed near a box of sparklers, let alone a gun. Not only does he openly state that he does not care about the repercussions of lax gun legislation, but he is willing to “turn [his] guns on the government and [people who support realistic and reasonable gun regulation].”

    http://aattp.org/despicable-gun-nut-rants-on-facebook-i-dont-care-about-your-dead-children/

    Ammosexual Firearms Trainer Promises Armed Teachers Will Have ’90 Percent’ Accuracy in Future School Shootings (Video)

    http://aattp.org/ammosexual-firearms-trainer-promises-armed-teachers-will-have-90-percent-accuracy-in-future-school-shootings-video/

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous3:46 PM

    Why Don't Physicians Talk About Guns? It's Not Only About the NRA

    he NRA decided years ago that there's no seat at the table for physicians when the committee hearing or the funding agency gets together to talk about guns. They don't even want physicians talking to their own patients about guns and they certainly don't want the Surgeon General ever to say anything about guns. But while such aggrieved nonsense may play well with the NRA faithful, particularly repeated by a putative presidential candidate, those who live in the real world know that we all need a physician when it comes time to make critical decisions about our health.

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/mike-weisser/doctors-guns-nra_b_5521961.html

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous4:36 PM

    More TeaBagger-style parenting, just like Sarah Palin's sorry ass. Big talk about family values, being "good Christian patriots", etc. They're quick to criticize and often lie about others, but they fail to walk the walk themselves. This reminds me of Huckabee's son torturing and killing the dog while Huck-a-buck was gov of AR, and fatboy gov-nuh interfering with investigation and then lying a about the whole episode.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Boscoe5:19 PM

    ...because what says trustworthy like an uncontrollable sneer and changing the rules of the game in midstream?

    I'm betting attendance fell off sharply.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Anita Winecooler7:56 PM

    "Hey, that was awesome, incredible we had a party on the patio it was awesome great....." that's where I stopped listening. "Awesome" was banned from use in our house since Moon Unit Zappa's "Valley Girls" made it popular.

    What's so awesome about a killing machine being raffled for fathers day anywhere, especially a church that doesn't pay taxes.

    It's been ages, but didn't Jesus overturn the tax collector's tables in churches? Didn't the bible say something about rendering unto Caesar his due? Let's start with that.

    Can't get any "gooder" than Jesus so Wayne LaPierre is dead wrong. Even if he had a Glock, he wouldn't know what to do with it.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Pro-Life my aching azz!

    ReplyDelete

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