Thursday, January 14, 2016

Ted Cruz picks up the coveted Duck Dynasty vote.

Courtesy of MSNBC: 

Having determined Republican White House hopeful Ted Cruz uniquely qualified to “make him a good duck gumbo,” controversial reality TV star Phil Robertson officially endorsed the Texas senator for president on Wednesday. 

“My qualifications for President of the United States are rather narrow,” said Robertson, the patriarch of A&E’s “Duck Dynasty,” in a video released by the Cruz campaign Wednesday. “Is he or she Godly, does he or she love us, can he or she do the job, and finally would they kill a duck and put him in a pot and make him a good duck gumbo?” 

“I’ve looked at the candidates,” Robertson said. “Ted Cruz is my man.”

Seeing Ted Cruz dressed head to toe in camouflage, with little red earplugs and black grease paint on his face, may be one of the most absurd images of this election cycle.

Last night Rachel Maddow called this perhaps the most effective GOP advertisement yet.

The very idea that she might be right, is deeply troubling. 


  1. Anonymous12:04 PM

    Meanwhile, "someone" is offended he got put at the kiddie table. Warning: graphic picture may be offensive to some.

    1. Anonymous12:19 PM

      How childish and how appropriate that he is being sent to the kiddie table. He should be put in a corner for a time out and then put down for a nap!

    2. Rand Paul should have dropped out months ago. He has only himself to blame.

  2. Anonymous12:10 PM

    That ad is beyond embarrassing. Raphael, what were you thinking???


    1. Anonymous12:47 PM

      ALL his ads are beyond embarrassing. The light saber and the CGI elephants?

      What is wrong with this guy?
      More troublingly, what is wrong with his supporters? They consider this ridiculous steaming pile to be pithy political discourse???

    2. Anonymous12:53 PM

      I forgot about that one. How can anyone take this guy seriously? Oh yeah...there are even more supporting tRump. Pretty scary stuff...


  3. Anonymous12:11 PM

    That ad is beyond embarrassing. Raphael, what were you thinking???


  4. Anonymous12:21 PM

    Either a. The American Taliban has chosen their candidate, or b. The Village People are touring with a new "cast".

  5. Anonymous12:32 PM

  6. Anonymous12:33 PM

    Raphael is a good fit for these zealots. He is certainly a Quack!
    Yep, he is their man.
    What a bunch of moron's.

  7. Anonymous12:35 PM

    Hey Ted.

    Not the DukKKKlukkkers! Over here, at the Goldamn Sachs no doc loan dept!

  8. Anonymous12:42 PM

    A Tea Party presidential candidate secretly financed by Wall Street?

    Who would have suspected that?



    Gun Nutterz!!!

  9. A. J. Billings12:43 PM

    Oh what a great endorsement from the guy who said adult men should marry 15 year old girls, because

    "Look, you wait 'til they get to be 20 years old, the only picking that's going to take place is your pocket. You got to marry these girls when they are about 15 or 16. They'll pick your ducks.

    Other verbal gems from one of $tupid $arah's friend are:

    "Make sure that she can cook a meal. You need to eat some meals that she cooks, check that out. Make sure she carries her Bible. That'll save you a lot of trouble down the road," he said.

    ""It seems like, to me, a vagina -- as a man -- would be more desirable than a man's anus," Robertson told GQ when opening up about topics he said he couldn't discuss on the show. "That's just me. I'm just thinking: There's more there! She's got more to offer. I mean, come on, dudes! You know what I'm saying? But hey, sin: It's not logical, my man. It's just not logical."

    Straight out of Deliverance and the 1800's backwoods of the bayous.

    1. Anonymous12:59 PM

      Sorry, those folks in Deliverance were far better looking and much smarter than crazy poppa duckf*ck

    2. Anonymous1:39 PM

      Don't forget the entire "duck thing" is a ruse, these guys are all preppy country club golfers, in real life:

  10. Anonymous12:48 PM

    The duck gumbo candidate is an undocumented candidate. The ad would play even better if it showed the slaughter of a Canada Goose. Then cooked it.

    1. And doesn't "dirty rice" go with gumbo?

  11. Anonymous1:06 PM

    It may be the most cynical ad, yet. Us v. Them. God v. Satan

  12. Anonymous1:13 PM

    So how are the Louisiana ducksters going to vote in Iowa, New Hampshire, South Carolina, Nevada ....?

  13. Anonymous1:19 PM

    I have been told Duck Dynasty is a popular reality show. Cruz may get votes from the Duck followers. My criteria for a president is not about his or her hobbies or sports.

    Putin may be intimidated by a good duck gumbo and ISIS may fold.

    1. Anonymous1:45 PM

      I, for the life of me, do not get reality shows and their "stars" being held up on the pedestal they are. This world has gone plain mad.

  14. Anonymous1:24 PM

    A,J. Billings 12:43 PM You forgot to add
    the other " PERV " Ted wants to spank
    Hillary and brags about spanking his little girls. I am going to watch an see if Ted's
    wife always keeps her arms covered to cover
    the bruises!

  15. Boscoe1:38 PM

    Wait, I thought Bin Laden was dead?

  16. Anonymous1:50 PM

    Ayatollah Robertson

  17. Anonymous1:57 PM

    OT - "In a crude and politically pointless Facebook rant, former half-term Alaska Governor and failed VP candidate Sarah Palin argued President Obama’s successful diplomatic inquiry with Iran that lead to the immediate release of ten sailors somehow equates to “bending over for Iran.”

    1. Anonymous2:07 PM

      Did she think we should declare war in 24 hours?

    2. Anonymous2:24 PM

      Missing from Palin’s tirade is the fact that engaging in diplomatic relations with Iran resulted in the release of the sailors in under 24 hours. It additionally helped to avoid a standoff similar to the one the UK and Iran face off in nearly a decade ago under similar circumstances. Most importantly, Palin doesn’t appear to care about the lives of the sailors so much as the opportunity to “bomb bomb bomb Iran…”

      Ignoring those glaring problems, Palin suffers from the disease running rampant through conservative America: war fever. Why seek peaceful solutions when you can beat the war drum and pump cash into the coffers of power political donors in the private industry that would benefit from yet another extended conflict?

      Why worry about the sons and daughters we’d be shipping off to Iran to die in a needless conflict? After all, those beating the war drum in the GOP typically never served in the military themselves nor will their children.

      Finally, and most poignantly, who is Palin to call for war when it was American sailors who encroached into Iran’s sovereign waters? Isn’t this the same woman who wouldn’t miss a beat calling for war if Iran did the same in American water space? (Especially near an American naval base…)

      Engaging in diplomatic relations after American soldiers accidentally intruded into another nation’s sovereign territory is neither “bending over” nor is it an appropriate way to maintain national sovereignty on the international stage; it’s just the opposite actually.

      It’s called hegemony, not sovereignty.

  18. Anonymous1:58 PM

    Since Sarah is getting the cold treatment from all the politicians, will we hear her praise and congratulate the duckie and of course Nicky for her rebuttal for Obamas speech, No she won't. If her name is not there, she will not say anything. Even the losers are upping her.

  19. You sure this isn't on Onion ad spoof? SO hard to tell these days. We used to laugh at comedians and expect intelligence from politicians, and now... no wonder Jon Stewart quit: his job of political satire was getting way too easy.

  20. Anonymous2:26 PM

    Planned Parenthood has dropped a bomb on CMP and those in the Republican Party who conspired with them produce and distribute illegal videos attacking the health care provider.

    Here is how Planned Parenthood described the lawsuit that was filed in California:

    The civil lawsuit that Planned Parenthood filed today in California charges anti-abortion activists with an elaborate, illegal conspiracy — one they created in order to falsely accuse Planned Parenthood of wrongdoing and ultimately block patients’ access to safe, legal abortion.

    The California-based CMP broke so many laws to manufacture their smear campaign that we couldn’t sue them for just one thing. Here are the highlights:

    The lawsuit is against known anti-abortion extremists, including Daleiden, Troy Newman, Albin Rhomberg, and Sandra Merritt, as well as the front organizations they created to commit their crimes: CMP and BioMax.

    The lawsuit charges that CMP, its leaders, and other co-conspirators:

    – Violated the Racketeer Influence and Corrupt Organizations (RICO) Act;
    – Violated the federal eavesdropping statute;
    – Engaged in wire fraud, mail fraud, invasion of privacy, illegal secret recording, and trespassing; and
    – Used a complex criminal enterprise to defraud Planned Parenthood and prevent it from providing health care.

    The lawsuit asks for restitution of compensatory and punitive damages and triple damages for violation of the RICO Act, as well as attorney’s fees.

  21. Anonymous2:46 PM

    Duck Commander looks like the Devil. Or a chimney sweep. Do they still have chimney sweeps? No? Then, he is the Devil for sure.

    1. Anonymous3:38 PM

      In that screen cap before I hit play, the streak on his nose looks like a small penis.

  22. Anita Winecooler4:02 PM

    Next.... the Cruz Duggar ad. The idiots are licking this up like milk! Candace Cameron BURRE was on the View and she was yakking in disjointed evangelical phrases, she didn't meet them, but they're nice, wholesome, Christian people..... ad nauseum. The looks on Whoopi and Joy's faces were priceless. BURRE asked why and they said "We met them, they were on THIS show once" To which, Burre, in her best drywall imitation, said "Oh, I see..." as W and J shook their heads no and rolled their eyes.

  23. Anonymous5:04 PM

    These GOP ads look like sketches from a bad episode of Saturday Night Live.

    It is so embarrassing to think that the world is watching this freak show and believing that these are the best candidates we could come up with.

  24. Anonymous12:10 PM

    Griffin. I need to correct your headline. He picked up the coveted DICK award.

  25. Anonymous8:16 PM

    When that show first aired, I'm ashamed to admit that I watched it, and was pretty amused by it. Then I found out they were a bunch of right wing khaki wearing rich swamp people, wearing costumes and pretending to be wealthy simpletons. Not amused any more. Now A&E is airing another fake swamp people show, because one of the fake offspring and his wife are adopting a kid. Good luck, little swamp kid. Grampa is a freakin' lunatic.


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