Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Texas apologizes for Rick Perry. Well I should think so!

(H/T to Politicususa for the video.)


Well I appreciate the thought Texas, but you will have to do better than that! I mean seriously, WTF?

Rick Perry, or "Governor Good Hair" as Molly Ivins referred to him, may be perhaps the most dangerous Teabagger in the Republican party at this point in time.

He is George W. Bush with fewer functioning brain cells, Rick Santorum with even more hatred toward women, and Sarah Palin with slightly larger clitoris.

In other words he is all of the bad fixins of the Tea Party, rolled up in a spicy Texas tortilla, and molded to look like George Bush if he had his Id set free after shotgunning Dr. Jeckyl's potion.

But the slack jawed, knuckle dragging, dimwit is more than just a simple minded, anti-government, secessionist, with a chimp like face.

"How come everybody always looks at me like that when I say Evolution's not real?"
 He is an extremely aggressive campaigner, who has a reputation for grinding his opponents under the wheels of his metaphorical monster truck. and whose many failings sound like the masturbatory fantasies of today's Teabagging GOP:

Perry has flaws, huge flaws. Not the least of which is that he presided over the execution of one of his constituents, Cameron Todd Willingham, who was probably innocent. But I’m not sure that's a liability in today's Tea Party–obsessed GOP. There’s a legend in Lone Star politics that one of Perry’s Republican rivals in Texas tested the Willingham issue in a focus group. One Republican man, the story goes, squinted and said, “Well, I like that. Takes a lot of balls to execute an innocent man.” At that moment, folks say, Perry’s rival knew opposing him was fruitless.

However, besides the fact when we close our eyes and listen to him speak he sounds EXACTLY like the guy who fucked this country up in the first place, the thing that might REALLY derail Perry's run at the nomination is his much vaunted, yet completely overblown, ability to create jobs. Which is so important to his campaign that he even had it stenciled, Sarah Palin style, on his rather uninspiring bus.


Here let Paul Krugman explain it to you:

Still, does Texas job growth point the way to faster job growth in the nation as a whole? No. 

What Texas shows is that a state offering cheap labor and, less important, weak regulation can attract jobs from other states. I believe that the appropriate response to this insight is “Well, duh.” The point is that arguing from this experience that depressing wages and dismantling regulation in America as a whole would create more jobs — which is, whatever Mr. Perry may say, what Perrynomics amounts to in practice — involves a fallacy of composition: every state can’t lure jobs away from every other state. 

In fact, at a national level lower wages would almost certainly lead to fewer jobs — because they would leave working Americans even less able to cope with the overhang of debt left behind by the housing bubble, an overhang that is at the heart of our economic problem. 

So when Mr. Perry presents himself as the candidate who knows how to create jobs, don’t believe him. His prescriptions for job creation would work about as well in practice as his prayer-based attempt to end Texas’s crippling drought.

So much for that.

However will Rick Perry most likely overshadow Michele "Watch me eat a corndog" Bachmann?

Yes, he will.

Does he present a REAL challenge to the equally follicly resplendent Mitt Romney?

Yup.

Will he eventually win the GOP nomination?

Hell if I know!

That depends on just how much control the Teabagger-Borg now exerts over the Republican party.

If the rootin' tootin' Yosemite Sam faction of the party now has a death grip on the steering wheel, and is determined to "drive this bitch over a cliff," than Rick Perry is going to be standing on the debate stage next to President Obama, Thesaurus in hand, as he tries to figure out "what in the sam hill" the President just said that made him look like such a fucking imbecile.

However if the Grand Ole Party kicks the frat boys to the curb, and starts thinking with their wallets instead of their dicks, they will certainly choose Mitt Romney, who will actually be able to stand on the stage and sound reasonably competent.

I mean yeah he'll still lose, since the Evangelicals hate his Mormon Tabernacle ass and he puts audiences to sleep faster than warm milk spiked with Ambien, but at least he will not embarrass the entire party before he goes down for the count.

That said, I am still not taking my eyes off of Rick Perry for an instant.  Just like Sarah Palin, I think he could be a very dangerous individual to have running lose across this nation, even if he does NOT get the nomination.

46 comments:

  1. Anonymous12:03 PM

    OK, so NOW the buzz is that Paul Ryan and Chris Christie are looking to make the leap...which means that Jeb Bush is probably not far behind. Good god. Was that the plan all along, to trot out the crazies and let them disintegrate, and then have the 'reasonable adult' step up to the plate?

    Well, Barack would still clean his clock, but we will be subjected to such vile and reprehensible lies, racist slurs, flawed patriotism accusations and so much more along the way with the wicked ways of the GOP, and ESPECIALLY the Southern GOP.

    We must all stand VERY strongly behind our President. With him serving another term, there will be MORE young people of voting age coming up and they are mostly very open and accepting and vote democratic predominantly, so by 2016, there will be an even BIGGER democratic base...now, who will run...Hillary...Biden...some other rising star?

    Barack Obama has served well and we need his continued calm, intelligent, mature and level-headedness to serve us fully.

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  2. Anonymous12:28 PM

    The Texas economic picture is a lie. My mom lives in a small, fairly wealthy Texas town-- and the gazillions of For Sale signs tell the story. As do the closed store fronts and teacher layoffs and big drop in tourism. I don't know what figures they're using to feed the media, but thank God, somebody is trying to correct the bad math.

    It's as if Texans are in collusion with each other to PRETEND everything is good. When I try to get my mom's friends (including business people, realtors, developers, small business owners, artists, ranchers, farmers) to tell me what's really going on, they just won't talk about it. Because talking about it would make it TRUE.

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  3. Anonymous12:29 PM

    Bachmann said, “Happy birthday. We played you a little bit of promise land when we pulled up. You can’t do better than Elvis Presley. We thought we’d celebrate his birthday as we get started to celebrating Take Our Country back tour. Because I’m here to announce in Spartanburg, South Carolina, we are going to make Barack Obama a one term president.”

    The only problem is that today isn’t Elvis Presley’s birthday. It is actually the 34th anniversary of the day he died. Presley’s birthday is listed as January 8, 1935. This is Bachmann latest in a line of celebrity related gaffes. The day she announced her campaign she confused John Wayne and serial killer John Wayne Gacy.

    These sorts of mistakes make a candidate look sloppy and bad. They feed into the popular perception that Bachmann is at best a bit of a flake. At worst, she may be mentally ill. From a practical political point of view these sorts of mistakes represent a lack of attention to detail and preparedness. These are not the mistakes of a well-oiled candidate or campaign.

    Bachmann claims to love Elvis just like she loves fiscal conservatism. Unfortunately, she seems to know very little about both. We all know Michele Bachmann loves a good conspiracy theory. Heck, her whole political career is based on pushing them. Maybe she knows something we don’t? Did she say Happy Birthday to The King on purpose?

    Does Michele Bachmann think Elvis is still alive?

    Michele Bachmann once claimed that the Census was evil and filling out the form would lead to conservatives being hauled off to internment camps, so it would surprise no one if she thought the King of Rock and Roll was alive and kicking.

    http://www.politicususa.com/en/michele-bachmann-elvis

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  4. Gryphen,
    I just want to thank you for continuing to expose the political nutjobs beyond just Sarah Palin.

    Now that it's patently obvious that her political career has crashed and burned, it's wonderful that you are expanding beyond her lunatic legacy. She was just the tip of the iceberg, and I fear that she will appear relatively tame in comparison to this new crop of dangerous "politicians".

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  5. Anonymous12:42 PM

    A while ago Perry said that anyone running for public office who already holds a public office, should resign from the first job to apply for the second. Will he resign as gov. of TexASS?? Also, too, he wanted TexASS to secede, just like Toad wants Alaska to!!

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  6. Anonymous12:45 PM

    So when Mr. Perry presents himself as the candidate who knows how to create jobs, don’t believe him. His prescriptions for job creation would work about as well in practice as his prayer-based attempt to end Texas’s crippling drought. And so the theory goes that keith fucked bristol and knocked her up. Is that about the way you got it from your friend? And that's the reason why she can't spill the beans on Sarah now?

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  7. If not Perry, who? Romneycare? No. Michele? Obviously not. Maybe Jeb Bush, as a last minute entry.

    On the other side, I wouldn't be too surprised to see Obama not seek re-election (maybe for "health" reasons), and for Hillary to be the nominee.

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  8. Anonymous12:47 PM

    Just like Palin, Perry will never be president. He is part of the teabagging racist terrorist neanderthal "Tea Party". They all belong in Federal Prison for treason.

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  9. Virginia Voter12:51 PM

    Don't know if you saw this, but a must read...

    http://www.politicususa.com/en/karl-rove-perry-bush

    Karl Rove talks about how close Rick is with George W.
    I swear to God watching Perry campaign these past couple of days is giving me nightmares about the remote possibility of another idiot cowboy Texas governor becoming president. He's Dubya on steroids. That voice , the walk, the fugly western belt and cowboy boots.....shudder.

    BTW, Sarahs 08 legacy is still being felt even here in VA. Remember Tito the Builder? He's running In the Republican primary for state senate . Can I just say fuck John McCain again?

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  10. Anonymous12:57 PM

    Politicususa has just posted another article about Perry - his connection to the porn industry.
    Pat Padrnos

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  11. Anonymous1:01 PM

    Rick Perry’s Hardcore History of Investment in Porn

    Here’s the story of how Rick Perry’s name became synonymous with “Teens with T*ts” in some circles. I’ve tried to make this safe for work, but if it’s not, blame Rick Perry, for such are the perils of reporting on good “Christians” like Mr James Richard Perry. If your employer has a problem with this, tell them to see Rick Perry; it’s his money trail we’re following.

    Perhaps when you see Rick Perry’s bouffant pompadour, you don’t immediately think “cheerleader”, but pom-pon carrier he was, albeit for Texas A & M instead of the Bush Yale pom-pons that heralded the destruction of America’s economy. But you’re all right with pom-pons on a man. To each their own. You might not be OK with the whole Lieutenant Governor to George W Bush thing. You might not be OK with Perry’s theocratic beliefs. But truthfully, when you picture the handsome, smirking Rick Perry and his Texas down home drawl, are you thinking about pornography?

    “Teens Never Say No” kind of pornography? How about “Teens with T*ts”? No? How about “Bisexual Barebacking Vol. 1” or “Big Tit Brotha Lovers 6”?

    Kinda makes you all warm and family values-ish.


    http://www.politicususa.com/en
    /rick-perry-investment-porn

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  12. Virginia Voter1:01 PM

    http://www.politicususa.com/en/rick-perry-investment-porn?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+politicususa%2FfJAl+%28Politicus+USA+%29

    Uh, oh....

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  13. Submitted w/o comment:


    http://thedailywh.at/2011/08/16/animated-gif-of-the-day-4/

    ReplyDelete
  14. Anonymous1:31 PM

    Here's Bachmann's crazy views on foreign policy:

    ...Although her chances of winning a general election seem low, it is time to review her foreign policy stances. The little that can be gleaned from her positions is self-contradictory, going back and forth between isolationism and militarism. But the militarism seems to trump other values for her, suggesting she could easily be captured by the neoconservatives.

    http://www.truthdig.com/report/item/president_bachmann_
    another_mideast_messiah_
    20110816/?ln

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  15. Anonymous1:36 PM

    O/T

    If Perry is helping Paul Ryan to make the leap. . .BRING YOUR WALLET!

    I read today(CNN political ticket?)
    that Paul Ryan is "charging"(pay-for-view politics?) $15 a person for his town-hall meetings. . .

    What a nice fiscal conservative income stream while supposedly being a representative "for the people" to answer questions and listen to concerns!

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  16. The 'rainbows and unicorns' jobs creation and great economy are a lie. Things are just as bad here as other places. I'm in Austin, and although it seemed the economy tanking took longer to get here, but it's here now, and it sure isn't going any where.

    Anyone who has a brain in Texas knows Perry's an idiot. It's just frustrating that he snows people over all the damn time.

    There was a fire at our governor's mansion while it was being renovated a few years ago. The guy who did it, who was caught on security camera, has yet to be caught, and us tax payers paid for the governor and his family to RENT a mansion in the country for what I believe was over a year. $10K a month. Sarah Palin even visited and did a few interviews from the home, as well.

    Just needed to get that off my chest....

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  17. Sigh. I'm already trying to decide which of my dolls looks like Michelle. Now I need a Perry doll too. These nuts are creating too much work for me. The unpaid kind.

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  18. Anonymous1:52 PM

    Okay, I have to say I am completely embarrassed Gryphen, that we kept electing this dodo as governor or our state. But just so you know, he never got the scrutiny here that he's about to get from the national press. When he won again in the fall he didn't do interviews with major papers and refused to debate. He knew he could get away with that in Texas, and he knows how to win.

    Even Republicans don't really like him here, but the state is simply not ready to elect a Democratic governor. In a few years things could change in Texas though-- Houston was the first city to elect an openly gay (democratic) mayor and Dallas and Austin are democratic cities.

    Perry knows how to win over conservative voters, like the majority of Texans are, so he is the man to beat in the primaries. He will not be able to win the general election though.

    For the next two years, Texas is going to be dragged through the mud, and we do deserve it after GWB and now Perry. But please do have mercy on us, Gryphen. You know how it felt when your state gave us the mentally deranged grifter.

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  19. Anonymous1:57 PM

    Perry is another tea potty nut. He has 2 faces - one is "charming" but get to know the other "face" - not so charming for sure!

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  20. OT Gryphen, but I was checking into the Christie/rape kit issue and discovered the likely reason for the hold-up. In addition to covering the cost of collecting forensic evidence, the bill also covers the cost of pregnancy tests and emergency contraception. Bingo!

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  21. Thank you G - that was fabulous! hahaha

    Now check this one out - it's Kathy Griffin telling the story of her conversation with Michelle Bachmann when she asked if she was born a bigot...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fzxN8pQUNLk

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  22. Why not tell us how you REALLY feel about Rick Perry, Gryph?

    P.S., Everything you said about him is true - but it's far, far, far from everything that COULD be said about him. Hopefully Rove's statement that Perry is just like George Bush will sink him with the teabaggers.

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  23. Anonymous2:20 PM

    For those of us from Texas who don't support Rick Perry, the constant blog bashing of Texas is a bit hard to take. Every single state has idiot politicians--every single one.

    Bash Perry--but to put everyone from Texas in his boat is wrong. He is disgusting to many.

    Some of us tried to get the word out months ago about Perry and nobody paid attention. Many of us who live in Texas do so for reasons other than the politicians. We are from Texas--not TexASS just like those from Alaska are from Alaska and not Al-ASS-ka but there are asses in all states.

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  24. Anonymous2:24 PM

    These vids are all I can think of when I see Perry.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VyqzPu5pX6U

    and

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GI-0HbNOZkI


    Is it too much wish for life to mirror fiction?

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  25. Anonymous2:39 PM

    A lot of interesting information about Rick Perry will start coming out as he becomes more politically active in national (as opposed to Texas) politics. Jim Hightower on Randi Rhodes show today said it best:

    The higher up the tree the monkey climbs, the more we see the ugliest part of him!

    ~Pogo

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  26. Beldar "La Do Da" Conehead2:59 PM

    Only the right wingers can answer the question: "How does this country recover from 8 years of damage done by the despicable George W. Bush?" with "Well... how about Dick Perry? He's simular to Bush but with less imtelligemce and more extreem religulous views."

    Are there rumors afoot that a mentally handicapped high-rise apartment building doorman in a large urban center named Jerome Wisniewski is preparing to throw his sweat-stained cap into the ring for the GOP presidential nomination under the slogan "Honestly, Just Not That Smart"?

    If true, it appears that Wisniewski's already clashing with Perry's lawyers who claim that slogan was actually written for the Perry campaign.

    Anyway, am I alone in wishing Perry would stay out of politics and work on reuniting with Journey on new material and a possible tour?

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  27. Anonymous3:08 PM

    Being from NJ - I pray that Christie just up and goes away - but I do NOT wish him the rest of the states and I don't want him any where near the White House

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  28. Anonymous3:13 PM

    Job creation? I taught school in Texas, and layoffs were plenty in Austin where Perry resides. Many consider Perry a do-nothing, blustery governor, who's been mighty lucky.

    The bigger frustration was that it's illegal for teachers, police, and firemen to unionize in Texas. There are loopholes that made it possible for me to be loaded with 45 kids per class!!I had my salary whacked $9000 one year without a meeting or courtesy of advanced notice. And my colleagues who were equally affected didn't do anything about it. It was more important to be polite -- no protest at all.

    Texas has a very top-down kind of mentality, and people are quite passive, contrary to popular belief. The way schools are funded has been declared illegal by the courts, and still it's allowed. The legislature meets infrequently, so little is accomplished. Special interests dominate the sessions because the legislators aren't up-to-speed on the issues. I loved it when the democrats went out-of- state to protest the disgusting redistricting lines drawn to protect Republican seats. I was so happy that Tom DeLay was taken to task.

    When President Lyndon Johnson did what was right for the country in signing civil rights legislation (rather than protecting his own hide), he said then that democrats would be losing the south for a generation. Sadly, it's been longer than that and the damage extensive!

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  29. Journey is doing just fine without Perry - they are touring and have put out two new albums of new material with their new lead singer, Arnel Pineda from the Philippines. See Wikipedia for more info.

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  30. Anonymous3:37 PM

    Oh you have NO IDEA. The things that go on here would SCARE you and make Palin look like a Junior Leaguer with just a little to much time on her hands. Would love to enlighten you but my family is aging now, we are to old to move. I am a native Texan. My family name is on the monument at the Alamo.

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  31. Anonymous3:46 PM

    Ann Richards must be rolling in her grave.

    Damm I miss that lady.

    I can hear her now saying
    'Poor Ricky, he can’t help it. He was born with a foot in his mouth.'

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  32. Anonymous4:26 PM

    Mr. 'job-creator' creates jobs alright - BELOW-MINIMUM-WAGE jobs!

    My daughter just recently was looking into a waitressing gig during her venue to get her MBA, and the going wage was $1.25/hr (YES: ONE DOLLAR + TWENTY-FIVE CENTS/hr!). They were supposed to make up the difference in tips - which was virtually IMPOSSIBLE at that joint...

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  33. FEDUP!!!4:55 PM

    Top 10 Things Texas Gov. Rick Perry Doesn’t Want You To Know About Him:

    http://thinkprogress.org/politics/2011/06/10/241830/top-10-thing-texas-gov-rick-perry/

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  34. Anonymous5:49 PM

    I never judge a state or country because of who's in office, didn't do it with Alaska, didn't do it with Jersey, didn't do it with Iraq, Iran, etc. etc. etc.

    It's like a family with a madman as a father, and you never judge people by their relatives and never judge a state because some idiot got elected into office.

    I think Perry is a greater threat than Palin and Bachman. We've got to keep a close eye on this weasel, there's tons of dirt on him that he can't pray away nor explain. Malia Litman's blog is full of some great info on Perry.

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  35. Anonymous6:04 PM

    While those of us who follow politics are aware of Perry's radical right-ring ideas, he seems intent on a whirlwind campaign to let everyone know just what a nutjob he is in the shortest amount of time possible.

    Just in the last few days:
    1. Says the federal government should have absolutely no role in education and does not believe that Texas should comply with any of the conditions associated with the tons of federal education funds he's happy to grab with his grubby little hands.

    2. Wants the President to declare a moratorium on ALL federal regulations (environmental, financial, industrial, security-related, etc) and would love to completely abolish the EPA.

    3. Thinks Ben Bernanke's ideas are 'treasonous' and says they would "would treat him pretty ugly down in Texas".

    4. Thinks Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid are "unconstitutional Ponzi schemes" and wants the states to take over SS (allowing some states to opt out altogether).

    5. Questions President Obama's patriotism and implies that the troops are not professional enough to be able to follow orders if they don't agree with his politics.

    6. Thinks poor people and seniors don't pay enough taxes.

    7. Thinks the 17th ammendment should be abolished and senators chosen by politicians instead of by election.

    For someone who is being hailed as the rising star, Perry seems to be hell bent on trying for a record for the shortest time between Presidential front runner status and campaign implosion.

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  36. Anonymous7:00 PM

    Planet of the apes: while George W. Bush looked like a Chimp. This uy looks like an ape...or ape man...or ... no I will not insult Neanderdal...so lets just leave it as ape.

    That and the man has no neck.

    DOn't even get me started on his poor wife! Don't give me "she"s just shy" BS that woman looks totally taumatized. Laura Bush always looked like a deer in the headlights, but this woman appears scared shitless.

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  37. Anonymous7:09 PM

    Looks like both Wisconsin Democrates have won their recall elections....unless some Wisonsin Republican shows up with a personal laptop full of "mystery" votes.

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  38. Anonymous7:13 PM

    Ryan, Christie, Bush_3 - go for it. WHy not? THe more options the greater the chance of getting a winner. :)

    THat means Jeb Bush....it would make Mamma Bush happy to extend her dynasty.

    Christie will never make it. He sactually upported a Muslim,

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  39. Anonymous8:06 PM

    He's frightening.

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  40. Anonymous8:40 PM

    Oh....so Evangelicals all hate Mormons? Since when? (Last I knew Mormons had quite a bit in common with Evangelicals.)

    I'd like to see the info on that.

    This Perry fellow isn't going to make it far. There has been so much drama around him already. Mitt is going to look mighty good to the GOP in a few weeks.

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  41. "Rick Perry is going to be standing on the debate stage next to President Obama, Thesaurus in hand...."

    I doubt it, Gryph. I suspect Perry thinks a thesaurus is one of those extinct dinosaurs that didn't make it to the ark.

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  42. Anonymous1:55 AM

    Anonymous @ 12:45 said:

    And so the theory goes that keith fucked bristol and knocked her up. Is that about the way you got it from your friend? And that's the reason why she can't spill the beans on Sarah now?
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    I've been thinking that myself. It explains why Levi made a perfect choice to be the "father"- - his genetics would be a match. Also too, Keith's been MIA since Levi was presented as the fiance. hmmm...

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  43. Anonymous4:30 AM

    Freddy at 12:46 pm. You really want another Bush? I'm looking forward to working to re-elect President Obama and to voting for him.

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  44. Beldar Bonzo Conehead7:10 AM

    "But the slack jawed, knuckle dragging, dimwit is more than just a simple minded, anti-government, secessionist, with a chimp like face."

    C'mon, Gryphen!!! That's VERY insulting language to use about the man who may very well become the next President of the United States of America! Of course, maybe it could help explain his penchant for throwing feces at people, so, what the hell, you might be on to something....

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  45. Anonymous8:39 AM

    Rick perry is gay. I read he was currently involved with one of his young chefs. Hopefully someone will spill the beans on him and destroy his chances at becoming the nominee. He is dangerous and there are plenty of people down here who want him out of office. He and his poicies have been truly detrimental especially to the neediest of people. he will take America down. Check out a You tube video detailing Rick Perry's homosexuality and the Bohemian Grove. Very interesting and folks where there's smoke there is fire. Its the hypocrisy of damning others and doing the same thing that bugs me.

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  46. Anonymous8:43 AM

    I wish everyone would quit putting Texans down. We're not all stupid conturds down here. I actively campaigned for Bill White and it broke my heart he lost. I met him, he was and is a good man and would have been a much, much better governor. It was a very low turnout election and to all the dummies that didn't vote against Perry, its your fault he got in once again.

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