Courtesy of Atlantic Wire:
Be assured, my decision was not in any way influenced by any concerns about my being reelected to Congress. I've always in the past defeated candidates who are capable, qualified, and well-funded. And I have every confidence that if I ran, I would defeat the individual who I defeated last year, who recently announced that he is once again running. And rest assured, this decision was not impacted in any way by the recent inquiries into the activities of my former presidential campaign or my former presidential staff. It was clearly understood that compliance with all rules and regulations was an absolute necessity for my presidential campaign, and I have no reason to believe that that was not the case.
Wow! That video contained a whole LOTTA crazy!
You know the possibility that her decision has nothing to do with concerns about losing MIGHT be true.
But it is MUCH more likely that the reason is because she is facing an FBI investigation and may be on her way to the clink. After all we DO have a history of Teabagger queens quitting when the FBI starts breathing down their necks.
Well I have to believe that the people of Minnesota are breathing a huge sigh of relief.
After all I remember how happy we Alaskans were when OUR village idiot was removed from office.
Locally there are rumblings to stay tuned for more enlightenment on this one. This did not come out of the blue as just two days ago her campaign ad was still running during the six o'clock news and she was at the dedication of the new bridge. Something popped and she walked. This oughta be good.
ReplyDeleteThat's a WHOLE lot of BATSHIT Crazy fembot! I had a hard time even believing this IS REAL? WTF?
DeleteROFLMAO! I just came from the Asylum and the article they have up on Crazy Eyes is down right hysterical! For those who don't want to get boo boo and pee on them (no worries...I ALWAYS wear a HazMat suit whenever I go over there!) here it is...
ReplyDelete"I don’t know what to make of this." (Okay I straight up giggled over this...the first line!)
WASHINGTON — Minnesota Rep. Michele Bachmann, a conservative firebrand and a favorite of tea party Republicans, said Wednesday she will not run for another term in the U.S. House.
Bachmann, who ran for the Republican presidential nomination last year, announced her decision in a video on her website.
“My decision was not influenced by any concerns about my being re-elected,” Bachmann said. She narrowly won a fourth term in 2012 over Democrat Jim Graves, a hotel chain founder who is running again in 2014…
Graves said he thought Bachmann had “read the tea leaves.”
This next paragraph had be laughing so hard I almost fell out of my chair!
"This is somewhat of a surprise. There have been rumors that she’s considering a run against Al Franken, but I don’t see her winning a statewide race in Minnesota. There are reports of several investigations involving the finances of her ill-conceived 2012 presidential run which may have been a factor in her decision, although she claims not. Still, she probably would have won re-election to her Congressional District had she run, regardless of Graves’ musings. She won (barely, to be sure) in 2012 with Obama at the top of the ticket, but should have had an easier time in 2014 without Obama’s campaign machine driving up Democrat turnout and an increasingly unpopular Obamacare to run against. And let’s not forget about Obama’s scandals which may further depress Democrat turnout. Maybe there’s another shoe about to drop? Who knows."
And then I read the COMMENTS!
If you wanna laugh...get thee over to the Asylum...but make sure you're properly inoculated and your funny bone is tuned up! Have fun and Godspeed! LOL!!!
I found this one particularly funny:-
Deletepalin45potus • 24 minutes ago −
I wish that Michele Bachmann was going to become a trustworthy voice for conservatism, but somehow I just see her as a zany loose cannon that the media will always be able to count on for an idiotic quote that paints conservatives as whackos.
------------------------------------
Haha, sounds just like the 'whacko' they worship on a daily basis, doesn't it?
Um, she's not any zanier or looser than all the rest of the GOP. Seriously...they all think women are worthless unless they are 'hot' and after them, and they think the poor are just lazy. Bachmann just says out loud what Boehner and McConnell believe. How come she didn't mention God and prayer and Him telling her not to run again? I thought she was God's little angel in DC?
DeleteOMG! Seriously y'all...the comments over there are fucking hilarious! All the comments sound like they are talking about BALDY! THIS comment in particular is so chock full of nuttiness that I wanted a peanut butter "sammich" after reading it!
Delete"Reynolds88 • an hour ago −
I was sorry to see Michele Bachmann choose Ed Rollins as her presidental campaign manager. After that, she was doomed in that race. I think she says the truth that the last house run (2012) was merely to save the district (and her career) but she did not rise in the house leadership. Instead the opposite happened. I think the game was very rough on her especially when her own party was taking pot shots at her at every other turn and given the migraines and so on, that can take a toll.
Just for contrast, consider some of the other Republican women in the House: Marsha Blackburn, Kristi Noem, Cathy McMorris Rodgers. Each one of them is getting stronger while they each have their own strong opinions, some more moderate but they all are in the game. They are all good looking and know the political dance very well. Each one has advanced a careeer on a steady path in politics whereas, Michele Bachmann jumped too far ahead in the 2012 presidential primaries and had to pay a price. I suppose this is the price.
One of the problems MB had was that she often spoke about things in speeches using fuzzy examples that were not carefully researched. This left her open time and again to be wrong on the details and collapsed little by little her credibility. By contrast, someone like Ted Cruz has not had to back down on details since his knowledge is vast and his comments are specific and well thought out in advance.
As to the 2012 non-entry of Sarah Palin in the republican primaries, I believe Sarah Palin was not hiding her motivations and played the hand she was dealt.
Unfortunately, Romney had access to his own $250 million to win the primary but he was obviously incapable of winning the general election. Being one of those knock-em-down puppets was not the role Sarah Palin wanted and even if she did, the toll on her family (security concerns and finances especially for Bristol, Track and the other children and grandchildren) was going to be a heavy price that Mama Grizzly could not allow them to pay. Next time, (2016) there will be different variables and Sarah Palin herself, has not ruled out a run.
MB paid her own price. However, Sarah Palin has the willingness to try and persuade the electorate in 2014 to help turn the tide, especially in the Senate. I believe she is still reading Sun Tzu and not merely basking in the Phoenix sun or Wasilla lakeside. This is why I am still eager to keep donating to SarahPac. I do believe, something good is in there."
Okay this part here...."This is why I am still eager to keep donating to SarahPac. I do believe, something good is in there."
WTF!! That's some serious "Cult"tiness there!!
My favorite comment at the peepond is this one:
Delete"OLDIRON • 3 hours ago −
Yeah, my sentiments also. I may be mistaken, but isn't she credited with setting up the Tea Party Caucus ? ------ Also, even though there are some vile statements about her here ----- what does Sarah think ?"
As I've always said, they can't commit to any opinion of their own without "Granny Grizzly" telling them exactly what their opinion should be. They will continue to run around in circles until they receive orders from The Grifter.
But first, Sarah has to decide "what's in it for me?" and how she can turn Bachmann's announcement into SarahPAC donations.
Hey peeponders: I hear Aldi has a big sale on cat food this week. Better stock up!
My fav? Ted Cruz has 'vast knowledge.' Of what? The way McCarthy operated in the 50's?
DeleteShe's reading Sun Tsu??? LOL!
DeleteOnly if Sun Tsu is the name of Wasilla's Chinese restaurant, and Sarah's reading the menu!!!
Well, she's not going to run for the House but is she going to go after Al Franken's seat in the Senate?
ReplyDeleteBeaglemom
No. She'll be too busy chatting with the FBI.
DeleteSeriously, I don't think she is crazy enough to do that. She'd lose in a landslide.
DeleteShe will be missed.
ReplyDeleteCertainly Minnesota's best representative.
Has Marcus blown her cover as his beard? Has he blown someone else with a wide stance who can't dance all that well, perhaps? Faux Pas.
DeleteMost importantly, will Marcus still coordinate Shelley's wardrobe? Oh no, within a month's time, Crazy Eyes could be dressing as tacky as The Quitter does everyday. The horror. The horror.
Hey, 6:48 AM, kind of early to be hitting the bottle, isn't it?
DeleteSo, go ahead and name some other of Minnesota's representatives, wouldja pleeeze? Without googling of course.
You're joking I hope.
DeleteIf not, please seek help from a responsible adult.
Well, at least she has one fan.
DeleteBest for comedians maybe, but pretty shitty for everyone else.
DeleteShe'll be missed, alright! She's good for so many laughs! Her "accounting" of President Obama's travel expenses, her jealousy that they have a movie theater, and who can forget her abiding respect and admiration for John Wayne Gacy?
DeleteIt's hard to find so much stupid in one package!
For someone who is so confident she could win a reelection and there was no wrong doing...she up and quits....hmmm...what a crock of shit.
ReplyDeleteDoes quitting mean she won't do jail time?
Is there anyone she could cut a deal like that with?
Delete"Call off the FBI and drop the investigation and I won't run for political office after my current term is up."
Cluster-Fox needed someone to replace the Monkey Queen !!! Who better than her clone?
ReplyDeleteOh noes! What will out country do without her on the Intelligence Committee?
ReplyDeleteGood riddance to bad, crazy rubbish
Someone dug up some dirt on her. No way this attention whore would just walk away. And, she was still running ads just 2 days ago. Pretty big decision to be that spontaneous. Good riddance, although pinwheel eyes will probably just take wonky eye's place at faux.
ReplyDeleteI saw her wacko ad bragging with extreme pride about writing the newest bill to repeal Obamacare.
DeleteYou are right. Something is up.
There are a couple of things which could have caused Batchit Bachmann pack up her crazy and go home. Fact or Fiction, who knows? Just like Fox News!
Delete1. Her purse carrier Markus has been posting some of those Anthony Weener type pictures. Jabba the Hutt in the bathroom mirror. Someone recognized a purse?
2. Batchit and and her attorneys could not get the homeschooler email theft and campaign coverup lawsuit to settle. Bad news: the Heki's don't want forty pieces of silver and a non disclosure agreement to go away quietly.
3. Worse news: The Heki's told Michele they have been reading the bible and that money settlements are the devil's work. The bible says an eye for an eye and that is what they want the judge to take from Batchit Bachmanns and her staffers in a public trial!
4. About that FBI investigation...turns out there are some other things that turned up... Could be Marcus is cooperating in the hopes of a plea deal about all that stuff they found. Michele is now worried that she will be thrown under the bus by most all the congressional and campaign staffers she fired over the years.
5. Hiding in the bushes near the public restroom making her new anti gay campaign video and who comes out with a rent boy? Fabulous I say! Just Fabulous!
Who/What are the Heki's?
DeleteI'm disappointed. Jim Graves came SOOOOOOOOOO close last time. I think he would have won this time. That's one of the toughest districts for a democratic. Now I fear Jim's chances are going down the tubes through no fault of his own.
ReplyDeleteLucy
I agree. With a different, less insane candidate, it could be tougher for Jim Graves.
DeleteProbably some guy named Karl had someone give Michele a call. Karl Rove. That is who might be behind this.
DeleteWorking with people like Mitt Romney and the Bushes to kick the Tea Party and true patriotic Murricans like Michele and Sarah and the vaguely bearded one in the nuts.
I can't wait to have this plot exposed by Sarah later today. The ghostwriters probably have been told that this post will be pooped out direct from her crackberry.
I agree, this is bad news for Democrats because the best shot at picking up this seat in a very red district is Graves beating Crazy Eyes, his chances are diminished against a reasonable GOP candidate.
DeleteThere ARE no reasonable Republican candidates...they are all crazy and mean just like Shelly.
DeleteAgree. Dang. The R party here in MN is in disarray (leadership, finances, direction) but the 6th is purdy darn red.
DeleteAnd we still have to put up with her for another year and a half.
We'll see what the 3 investigations reveal.
Maybe Marcus was caught in a stall at MSP with his foot a tappin'.
ReplyDeleteWhere's Larry Craig when you need him?
DeleteWell, it won't be long before FOX has her spouting her nonsense on their airwaves. It's inevitable, unless of course she's indicted for her ethics issues.
ReplyDeleteShe'll get her own show with that kind of street cred.
DeleteIf I were Glenn Beck (or Limbaugh or Levin or fill-in-the-blank RWNJ), I'd be shakin' in my boots.
DeleteBachmann can outcrazy ALL of them, and FOX will probably be more than willing to give her a large audience and hour-long broadcast to do so.
Dust off the chalkboards! Aunt Crazyeyes is a-comin'!
She can outcrazy them, but unlike Sarah Palin, Ms. Bachmann can actually dress appropriately, and string a few words together to make a statement, however insane, about whatever topic is up for discussion.
DeleteIt is not likely that she will be gallivanting around all over the country, looking like an upright badger on meth.
You think in 2014 when her term is up she'll be any sort of relevant? Would Ailes make the same mistake twice?
Deleteand now the republicans will get someone crazy enough to cause problems, but not so crazy to marginalize like MB : (
ReplyDeleteMarcus sweetie,
ReplyDeleteI'm coming over this afternoon to help get all of the 'beard's' outfits back on the hangers and back in the closet. Pray she doesn't notice anything! Later, we'll share some corn dogs and act like nothing happened!
Love, Bruce
Rip Dump Bachmann blog. The efforts were not in vain.
ReplyDeleteI'd tell everyone to head over to the Dump Bachmann blog but it was taken down months ago. Rumors are that the blogger was threatened with lawsuits. That seems believable. From Mother Jones:
"Bradlee Dean, a longtime ally of GOP presidential candidate Rep. Michele Bachmann, runs a heavy-metal ministry in her Minnesota district that travels to public schools on the taxpayers' dime to push students to find Christ. He has performed at fundraisers for Bachmann, and Bachmann has done the same for Dean's ministry, You Can Run But You Cannot Hide International. Long a target of local bloggers in his home state, Dean has become increasingly defensive over the last few months as national organizations have taken note of his ties to Bachmann, and he strongly hinted that he was about to push back against the criticism in a big way. And now he has. On Tuesday, Dean announced he was filing a defamation suit against MSNBC host Rachel Maddow (and the network) for $50 million."
http://www.motherjones.com/mojo/2011/07/bachmann-anti-gay-ally-bradlee-dean-sues-rachel-maddow-50-million
That didn't turn out so well for hairball preacher:
http://newsbusters.org/blogs/jack-coleman/2012/11/15/judge-dismisses-christian-rockers-defamation-suit-against-rachel-maddo
I doubt that lawsuit will go anywhere...I'll be curious to see if Dr. Maddow mentions it. Her reporting is outstanding, well researched and well presented ALWAYS. She's my favorite show to watch.
DeleteBachmann's fall
ReplyDeleteRep. Michele Bachmann (R-Minn.) — the tea-party firebrand facing investigations and a daunting reelection race — abruptly announced on Wednesday morning that she will not seek reelection to a fifth term.
Her move marked a spectacular fall for a congresswoman with a bull’s eye on her back every congressional cycle: Less than two years ago, she won the Iowa straw poll and was briefly regarded as a serious contender for the GOP presidential nomination.
http://www.politico.com/story/2013/05/michele-bachmann-retiring-91978.html?hp=t1_3
"briefly?" Yeah, for about the entire run of the Iowa caucus, and only because she paid people to come and vote for her.
DeleteIt was the homeschoolers that won her the straw pool.
DeleteHer campaign used a really good email list to...
Gryphen, you've made some very disturbing comments over time against the unfettered sales, distribution, ownership and use of firearms in America. However, as media outreach director for The Conservative American Cannoneers Association (CACA), I would like to ask for your support for our upcoming 2014 campaign to have breech and muzzle loading cannon, up to 15 tons in weight and 21 feet in length, included in 2nd Amendment protections just like relatively harmless handguns and assault rifles enjoy.
ReplyDeleteIn addition, as documented in Fodder, our monthly magazine and WeHaveCannonBalls.com. our website, we're raising money for member Dick Wadd's legal defense in a campaign we're calling CannonAid. We're hoping to get Ted Nugent to sing We Are The World for a promotional video.
As you may already be aware from lame stream media reports, this Dick Wadd was arrested for accidentally discharging his gorgeous 15ft long cast brass 17th Century brigantine-mounted replica cannon and destroying a nearby convenience store with a 350 pound cast iron projectile filled with 150 pounds of high explosives.
The operative word here is "ACCIDENT" and this Dick Wadd has already apologized profusely once to "anyone, anywhere who was offended by anything that happened on that day". What more do these liberals want from this Dick Wadd? BLOOD? It's not as if anyone was killed in the store. And the people still in the hospital are almost all reported to be in 'fair' or better condition. What a bunch of whiny babies!
Ensuring this Dick Wadd's defense and exoneration on misdemeanor charges of 'discharging a cannon in a residential neighborhood not zoned for artillery use' is really a win-win situation for everyone! If they force this Dick Wadd to pay the $35 fine AND promise not to fire the cannon again until the Fourth of July, the terrorists win!
The slogan for this campaign is, predictably: "UNTIL CANNON FIRE IS FREE FOR ALL, WE ARE ALL DICK WADDS"
Thanks for your support!
lol!
DeleteI love Beldar!
DeleteLOL.
DeleteDick Wadd's lead counsel is renowned attorney, P. Nessed.
Oh Dear! One of your best so far!
DeleteDaily Kos has a piece in archive that reminds me of Beldar (If that's his real name, I have my doubts!)
ww2012/10/23/1148830/-Dear-Lord-what-about-the-Cannonballs#w.dailykos.com/story/
While Bachmann may hope to convey a sense of confidence, the truth is her career was in serious jeopardy. In recent elections, the right-wing Minnesotan eked out narrow victories -- she very nearly lost last November -- and recent polling suggested Bachmann would struggle to keep her seat in 2014. Quitting will save her the trouble of losing.
ReplyDeleteWhat's more, Bachmann, the leader of Congress' "Tea Party Caucus," is currently under investigation by the FBI, the Office of Congressional Ethics, the Federal Elections Commission, and an ethics panel in Iowa for a variety of alleged misdeeds. If the congresswoman's bizarre ideology and erratic behavior weren't enough to push voters away, her ongoing scandals made her career prospects that much worse.
As for coming to terms with her political career, which included a failed presidential campaign in 2012, it's honestly hard to know where to start. Few politicians of this generation have been as ridiculous as Michele Bachmann. If there were a Hall of Fame for cringe-worthy members of Congress who could only be described as cover-your-eyes embarrassing, Bachmann would be a first-ballot inductee.
http://maddowblog.msnbc.com/_news/2013/05/29/18582692-michele-bachmann-to-exit-stage-right
Guess who's about to replace the queen of the nitwits on the burned-out-attention-whoring circuit? This is going to be pretty funny, cause the quitter now has some real competition.
ReplyDeleteI just reviewed comments made about Michelle and she is truly disliked horribly across the nation.
ReplyDeleteA liar, fraud, married to a gay (that she won't admit to), did a horrid job in Congress and on and on. Kinda reminds me of what I suspect Sarah Palin would run into should she try to run for Congress from either Alaska or AZ. Cracks me up even thinking about it!!!
Both women - not representatives of the American people and especially women!
Did Marcus get caught hot dogging the wrong set of buns?
ReplyDeleteAs I believe James Carville said: Republicans are glad. Dems are sad.
ReplyDeleteHe should know - look who he married!
DeleteI was a liberal mole at Fox News: From Bill O’Reilly to Roger Ailes, here’s all the inside dope
ReplyDeletehttp://www.salon.com/2013/05/29/i_was_a_liberal_mole_at_fox_news_from_bill_oreilly_to_roger_ailes_heres_all_the_inside_dope/
In all her years in Congress, Michelle Bachmann has sposoned a grand total of ZERO pieces of legislation that have actually become law. Zero. Some impact.
ReplyDeletehttp://thomas.loc.gov/home/LegislativeData.php?&n=BSS&c=113
That is amazing!!! Makes me sick - look at the money she was getting for no work, no bills of her own passed, etc. What a friggin' fraud.
DeleteReminds me of Sarah Palin!
Michele Bachmann: A Fact Checker’s dream "Bachmann is not just fast and loose with the facts; she is consistently and unapologetically so. No other lawmaker earned as high a percentage of Four-Pinocchio ratings as Bachmann"
ReplyDeletehttp://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/fact-checker/post/michele-bachmann-a-fact-checkers-dream/2013/05/29/1481a6b8-c85e-11e2-9245-773c0123c027_blog.html?tid=rssfeed
Michele Bachmann's file on PolitiFact
http://politifact.com/personalities/michele-bachmann/
According to Sarah Palin, knowing that the end of your term is coming makes you a "lame duck." (It does for Bachmann; didn't for Palin, who could have run for re-election.)
ReplyDeleteBy Palin's lights, however, Michele Bachmann should resign immediately, since a "lame duck" is, well, lame. This has nothing to do with the lamestream media, which Palin also loves to talk about.
"Lame" seems to be a recurring theme in Palin's world.
Palin and Bachmann could be sisters...liars, frauds w/no common sense!
DeleteMichelle Bachmann actually launched her re-election campaign 2 weeks ago, buying $85k in TV airtime and releasing a promotional video about her accomplishments...basically none of the reasons she cited in her decision last night are credible
ReplyDeletehttp://www.politico.com/story/2013/05/michele-bachmann-launches-tv-ads-17-months-before-election-91510.html
Bachmann should immediately be removed from the House Intelligence Committee.
ReplyDeleteIt was oxymoronic to appoint her to begin with, but she could very well sow mischief for the next months and when she's out of office if she's given continued access to classified information.
I so agree with you on this. What can we do? Who do we notify? I don't understand how she ever got on that committee in the first place. She's an idiot!
DeleteBachmann Retirement Ignites Flame War on Facebook
ReplyDeleteMichele Bachmann’s plan to give up her seat at the end of her fourth — and now final — term sparked a battle of words on the Minnesota Republican’s comment-laden Facebook page.
The tea party favorite succeeded, for once, in bringing together the far right and the far left — albeit only so they could viciously tear each other
http://hoh.rollcall.com/bachmann-retirement-ignites-flame-war-on-facebook/
I had to go over there to peruse, and I'll say "one" thing in her favor. Opposing views are allowed be her admin(s) which is WAY more than can be said for you-know-who.
DeleteWhat will they do without the MN Cuckoo?
ReplyDeleteTranslating Michele Bachmann’s Resignation Speech
ReplyDeleteMy good friends, after a great deal of thought and deliberation, I have decided next year I will not seek a fifth Congressional term to represent the wonderful people of the Sixth District of Minnesota. After serious consideration, I am confident that this is the right decision.
---After reading my poll numbers and having to endure multiple interviews with the FBI, I’ve decided that this job actually requires work, so I’m quitting.
However, the law limits anyone from serving as President of the United States for more than eight years. And in my opionion, well, eight years is also long enough for an individual to serve as a representative for a specific congressional district.
---To make myself feel better about leaving in disgrace, I’m going to pretend Congress is a club I don’t want to be in anyway, starting by disparaging those who managed to hang in longer than I did.
Be assured, my decision was not in any way influenced by any concerns about my being re-elected to Congress. I’ve always in the past defeated candidates that were capable, qualified and well-funded. And I have every confidence that if I ran, I would again defeat the individual that I defeated last year, who recently announced that he is once again running.
---And rest assured, this decision was not impacted in any way by the recent inquiries into the activities of my former presidential campaign, or my former presidential staff. It was clearly understood that compliance with all rules and regulations was an absolute necessity for my presdiential campaign, and I have no reason to believe that that was not the case.
---I think you’re dumb enough to believe that someone who ran for President last year suddenly had a change of heart about being a professional politician. I’m hoping that my reputation for being “crazy” will convince you that I’m indifferent to the relentless phone calls I’m getting from the Republican Party leaders begging me to step down so as not to lose an otherwise secure seat to a Democrat.
And even when it means resisting the policy positions of many in my own political party, I’ve always strived to be first and foremost a public servant and do what is best for the people and never acquiesce to being a political servant.
---Even when people were laughing at me, I never budged an inch from spouting John Bircher-levels of right wing nonsense.
Feel confident, over the next 18 months, I will continue to work 100-hour weeks
---Broken down: 10 hours doing work, 10 hours going on TV to be a freak show, and 80 hours fussing over paranoid fantasies of the Muslims/gays/feminists/college professors lurking in the bushes, waiting for me to let down my guard so they can drink my blood.
And I will continue to work vehemently and robustly to fight back against what most in the other party want to do, to transform our country into becoming, which would be a nation that our founders would hardly even recognize today.
---They wouldn’t recognize this mutant America, where women can vote and slavery is banned, that differs so from the nation they built.
I proudly have, and I promise you I will continue, to fight to protect innocent human life, traditional marriage, family values, religious liberty and academic excellence
Plus my eight years is plenty to get me a nice pension plus free cadillac health care for the rest of my life. No point in putting in any more time.
DeleteWell done, thanks.
Deletedowl
Bachmann and Palin sharing a prison cell, bumping uglies, fighting over canteen. The best reality show ever. Butch Sarah's catch phrase could be, "What's in it for us?"
ReplyDeleteChained Heat Flash.
Deletehttp://www.guardian.co.uk/tv-and-radio/tvandradioblog/video/2013/may/29/mark-gatiss-crawford-psychobitches-video
DeleteBlah, blah, blah . . . adopted babies for publicity purposes. . .
ReplyDelete---I’ll make a handful of speeches that continue to affirm people’s suspicion that I think married couples should have sex through a hole in a sheet.
I’ve called out the Muslim jihad terrorists for who they are, and for the evil that they perpetrate upon our people.
---No one would have noticed that Boston bombing if I hadn’t said something.
I’ve identified at the outset of the so-called Arab Spring, this adminsitration’s foriegn policy blunders and how those blunders have contributed into turning the Middle East into a devastating, evil, jihadist earthquake.
---You don’t really need to understand foreign policy so long as you accept that whatever Obama does must be wrong.
I’ve also demanded, consistently, a balanced budget and fiscal responsibility, that this be a preeminent government requirement, so as to avoid the dangers of a future, a financial calamity for our children and the ultimate risk of the destruction of our entire economic system.
---I hope that my uber-white district will continue to believe it’s better to burn this country to the ground than share it fairly with people who aren’t exactly like them, and won’t hold my behavior against whatever crazed but untested wingnut they run in my stead.
My core of conviction on these principal issues and more will continue, in a steadfast manner, during the remainder of my term and beyond.
---I promise at least a few more floor speeches that will make you marvel at their stupidity.
Unfortunately, today I am even more concerned about our country’s future than I have ever been in the past. On so many issues, we’re clearly on the wrong track.
---Please vote for whoever the Republicans run, or else you might end up with a gay, Latino boss one day.
But looking forward, after the completion of my term, my future is full, it is limitless, and my passions for America will remain. And I want you to be assured that there is no future option or opportunity, be it directly in the political arena or otherwise, that I won’t be giving serious consideration if it can help save and protect our great nation for future generations.
---Dear Fox News: If you give me a multi-million dollar contract, I won’t squander it like Sarah Palin did.
I fully anticipate the mainstream liberal media to put a detrimental spin on my decision not to seek a fifth term. Since I was first elected to Congress many years ago, they always seem to attempt to find a dishonest way to disparage me.
---Usually by quoting me directly, without comment.
To my many good friends and supporters, I will continue fight for public policy that is first and foremost in the best interest of the citizens of the United States at large.
---Seriously, Roger Ailes: I released this statement as a video as a reminder of how photogenic I am. I’ll settle for $2 million a year.
http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2013/05/29/translating-michele-bachmanns-resignation-speech/
Whoa! Something VERY BIG must be coming down the pike that Shelley found out about and she's pre-emptively getting a message out. She ran for president not more than a few months ago. That is NOT someone who wants to 'retire' from politics. She's been running ads for her seat in Minnesota for awhile now. She's been trying to jump on the IRS 'scandal' train.
ReplyDeleteNope, this woman is in very big trouble, and she's been essentially told by the higher ups in the party to step aside fast, so that the entire GOP House doesn't take the hit that is coming. They've gotten the results of the investigation that somebody leaked, and they're moving fast to avoid the fallout. Just watch.
Her goose is cooked and it came from the top of the heap of power brokers in the House. They're dodging a REAL scandal because that will take attention away from the faux scandals they're trying to gin up. The press will focus on the GOP rather than on the Dems and they can't afford that.
Yep, that makes a lot of sense, it's how they do it, get in front of a scam or scandal and try to spin it to their benefit. Those grifters sure do have a routine, don't they? But you're right, this must be HUGE for her to step down. I hope it shuts her up permanently.
DeleteAnother knee slapper from the asylum:
ReplyDeletevirginiagentleman1> palin45potus•2 hours ago−
Good morning my friend!
I got quite a chuckle out of Bachmann backing away from running again! A 'mini-me' Palin she is not! lol!
You're going suffering irreparable brain damage if you keep subjecting yourself to that stuff.
DeleteWonder if Baldy will take to her Twatter and sing Shelley's praises as a fellow conservative female?
ReplyDeleteShe can't afford the competition, since Michele, as FUCKING LOONY as she is, is a very attractive, very well presented, stylish (although we KNOW where that comes from, eh Mr. Closeted Bachmann?) person. Unlike some we know, she is professionally dressed, takes care of her personal hygiene (ie hair is washed and styled well and NOT a filthy wig, clothes are stain free, age appropriate).
She does remain a nasty piece of work inside that pretty package, which leads me to believe that she will leave politics and end up somewhere on the evangelic preachering circuit...or FOX...unless she's headed for prison.
One flew "into" the Cuckoo's Nest.
ReplyDeleteSchlafly advises Republicans: Ignore Hispanics and ‘reach out to… white voters’
ReplyDeleteConservative activist Phyllis Schlafly says Republicans are making a mistake by trying to court Hispanics with comprehensive immigration reform legislation.
“I think that’s a great myth because the Hispanics who come in like this are going to vote Democrat,” Schlafly told the Focus Today radio program in a clip obtained by Right Wing Watch on Wednesday. “And there is not the slightest bit of evidence they are going to vote Republican.”
“And the people the Republicans should reach out to are the white votes — the white voters who didn’t vote in the last election, and there are millions of them,” she advised.
Schlafly added that the Republican establishment had given the party a “series of losers” with the nominations of former Sen. Bob Dole, Sen. John McCain and former Gov. Mitt Romney.
“The propagandists are leading us down the wrong path,” the activist remarked. “There’s not any evidence at all that these Hispanics coming in from Mexico will vote Republican.”
Last month, Schlafly told Republicans that they would be committing “suicide” if they enacted immigration reform.
Watch this video from Focus Today, uploaded May 29, 2013.
http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2013/05/29/schlafly-advises-republicans-ignore-hispanics-and-reach-out-to-white-voters/
Maybe Shelly really is planning to move to Oregon.
ReplyDeleteThe minute you turn the heat up on all of these tough talking, warrior shouting, God fearing, so-called patriots, they turn tail and QUIT. Tea Party my ass. More like Tea Pussies.
ReplyDeleteThe media has taken the same excuse that they crafted for Sarah Palin, that she was an undisciplined conservative star who flamed out, and glued it on to Michele Bachmann. The problem is that in Bachmann’s case it doesn’t fit. It isn’t a surprise that Rep. Bachmann would deny everything surrounding the ethics investigations in her video. That is exactly what she is supposed to do. She is not going to admit that she is quitting because of allegations of misuse of funds, theft, and money laundering, among other crimes.
ReplyDeleteMichele Bachmann didn’t choose to quit on a whim. She quit as a preemptive strike to stop this scandal from either costing her the election next year, or bringing her down later.
The media has chosen to ignore the real evidence in the Bachmann scandal, while turning Republican edited Benghazi emails into national news. The media has been the Republican Party’s obedient lapdog when it comes to chasing bogus Obama scandals, but they have no interest in scandal that swallowed up a national Republican.
The double standard is obvious.
It doesn’t matter to the media that Republicans are mostly lying about the Obama scandals. The media could care less that Bachmann lied throughout her “retirement” video. They aren’t even bothering to ask why Bachmann chose to quit via a YouTube video instead of a press conference. (The answer is that Bachmann didn’t want to have to answer any media questions about the ethics scandal.)
...Princess Crazy Eyes is most likely splitting because the heat is getting too hot, but the media is too busy chasing down what Obama knew about Benghazi to bother with something as small as a Republican member of Congress quitting while allegations of felonious activity swirl around her.
The greatest irony of all is that roughly two weeks ago Bachmann stood before the national media and called for Obama to be impeached, only to find herself chased from office by her own or her staff’s illegal activities.
http://www.politicususa.com/mainstream-media-admit-ethics-scandal-forced-michele-bachmann-quit.html
Stinks of a plea deal to me. Similar to Palin's quit to stay out of jail ploy.
ReplyDeleteI agree.
DeleteWonkette
ReplyDeleteTIPS
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May 29, 2013
THE WAY WE WERE 9:52 am May 29, 2013
Weep Weep Wonket For Your Fallen Hero Michele Bachmann
by Rebecca Schoenkopf
It takes a big woman to admit both her poor electoral chances and the investigation into all her crimes, in the first minute and a half of her speech announcing her upcoming retirement, or else it takes an amateurish speechwriter who isn’t really aware of stuff like “not bringing up poor electoral chances and the investigation into all her crimes in the first minute and a half of a retirement speech.” Six of one, and cetera!
Anyway, here is our greatest pal, Michele Bachmann, announcing that her upcoming retirement has nothing whatsoever to do with her poor electoral chances or the investigation into all her crimes. Then she says a lot more stuff, we were not listening, as the air started going all wavy around us, and suddenly we were slo-motioning in flashback, remembering the time we picked her a flower, and the time we smeared frosting on each other’s noses, and the time we sang into hairbrushes in our jamas, and all the other good times we had.
Remember when Michele Bachmann said God would make Obama repeal Obamacare? WHO WILL MAKE GOD MAKE OBAMA REPEAL OBAMACARE NOW?
http://wonkette.com/517967/weep-weep-wonket-for-your-fallen-hero-michele-bachmann#more-517967
Is Shelly sporting a black eye in that video?
ReplyDeleteRebecca is Goddess.
ReplyDeleteGotta love our Andy Borowitz.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/borowitzreport/2013/05/congress-average-iq-expected-to-rise-in-2014.html?mbid=nl_Borowitz%20(130)
Bwa ha ha!
DeleteNailed it.
Andy Borowitz is about a funny as a botched episiotomy.
ReplyDeleteYou apparently have the sense of humor of a squashed spider. So sad for you.
DeleteMinnesotans do this to losers: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NPQP-9OpCqk
ReplyDeleteNa Na Na Na
Na Na Na Na
Hey Hey Hey
Goodbye
ReplyDeleteIn a word: bullshit. The Office of Congressional Ethics investigation into her presidential campaign that was first disclosed by The Daily Beast is due to release its initial report soon. If it looked like Bachmann would be vindicated, she would have persisted in running for a congressional seat that had been gerrymandered to increase of her chances of representing a state that looks primed to easily reelect Al Franken to the Senate. This decision smacks of lawyer’s counsel—get out now before the boom comes down, and perhaps people will listen to your final signoff.
There is, inevitably, a rambling quality to an eight-and-a-half-minute monologue. This is Bachmann's hostage video to reality. The staff decision to back her vocal track with faint Springsteenesque music was a tell—the video would have seemed ever odder without it. Bachmann was at turns defensive and defiant and bucket-list ticking, talking about her excitement at taking a plane to London to attend Margaret Thatcher’s funeral, her co-sponsorship of the 37th attempt to overturn Obamacare (“which passed in the House”), and her philosophically contradictory commitment to bring federal tax dollars to her district to build a regional airport and rebuild a bridge. Note to Bachmann: you didn’t build that.
...She degraded national debate, consistently chose fearmongering over facts, and exhibited every impulse of the demagogue and the ideologue. If she ever bothered to do her homework, she could have been dangerous. Instead Bachmann will stand as a sad cautionary tale, a curious footnote used to explain the reality-show auditions of the 2012 GOP presidential primaries, now all part of her reel tape as she attempts to get what she always really wanted: a Fox News contract.
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2013/05/29/michele-bachmann-is-done-her-hostage-video-to-reality.html
Whatever the real reason, I say "Hooray!!"
ReplyDeleteMaybe Marcus came out of the closet!
ReplyDeleteShe is probably running for a higher office. It's scary!
ReplyDeleteOh, I'm sure Swiss Miss and Marcus are wearing lederhosen , yodelling, and sharing a celebratory corn dog while her lawyer pens a plea deal.
ReplyDeleteShelly's going to sing like a canary. Run Sarah, Run!!