Every summer somebody guilts me into taking them camping, and every time I spend the entire trip wishing I was back home in my warm bed.
Summer is here again, so I know what's coming.
Now don't get me wrong, when I was younger I went camping all of the damn time.
I even spent the night on a mountain top with no tent or sleeping bag for protection.
Hell I once slept in a damn tree!
But come on, do you have any idea how much my mortgage payment is? Why would I spend all of that money and then to sleep under a swarm of mosquitoes, only to wake up with my clothes soaking wet from a surprise rainfall.
And then I have to spend the next several days trying to work the kink out of my lower back, while answering the hundreds of e-mails that arrived while I was gone.
I live only a few minutes away from great hiking trails, plenty of fishing streams, and more nature than many people see in a lifetime. And all of it is only a handful of minutes away from my very own bathroom and internet.
Now if I can only convince everybody else.
I'm with you. Early in our marriage, my wife and I took a trip to Yosemite with an eye to 'roughing it' in the motel located next to Camp Curry on the valley floor. No room at the inn, as it turned out, plus the building was surrounded by idling buses that had brought in the Trailways tourists.
ReplyDeleteWe noticed a large hotel, The Ahwahnee, and asked at the desk if they had a room available. No, they were booked solid, but in 15 minutes it'd be 6pm and if anyone with a reservation failed to show up, they'd release the room to us. Shortly after we signed up and were given the key, that person DID show up. Too late. Ever since, we've said our idea of camping is a room at The Ahwahnee. Totally awesome.
We just get old enough to prefer real beds and real chairs and roughing it loses its appeal, like staying up all night did. Give your tent away, Gryphen.
ReplyDeleteI'm with you Gryphen. Nature is lovely. I walk in it. I look at lovely flowers and walk trails---then I take my tired ass back to a warm shelter where I won't bump into the many black bears who have taken to patrolling the suburbs here. They aren't aggressive--but they are bears.
ReplyDeleteBravo to anyone who wants to sleep under the stars. I want to sleep under air conditioning.
Still I think you're doomed to camp, Gryphen. You need to find more agoraphobic friends.
I like the spending time outdoors part, but I buy a vehicle which has a front seat that folds flat. I fold the other seats flat, place a piece of plywood between the flat-folded front and back seats, toss in a mattress and sleep in my vehicle which stays dry in the rain. I put up a gazebo for sun and rain shelter during the day. I skip the hot, wet, mosquito filled tent. Works great as long as I am "camping" near my car. Vehicle is a little more bear proof, too. Blankets or sleeping bags stay dry, too. Best of both worlds when I am away from home.
ReplyDeleteThats too funny....reminds me of my X husband. I always enjoyed camping trips, esp to Delaware Water Gap for canoeing. In our 20's the main idea was to drink alot and have fun all night around the campfire. Then we all got married, had kids and it was still fun...just different. At the time my X was an over the road trucker and considered his entire life a camping trip...so he never would go. I can only imagine how awesome it would be sleeping under the stars where you live...a bit more dangerous though. Its and "age" thing..we like our comforts now.
ReplyDeleteHi! Off topic, but just came across this April 28, 2014 post on The Washington Post website. "Sarah Palin soldiers on as a diminished figure in the Republican Party" http://j.mp/1k36YLp
ReplyDeleteWas that before or after her husband came on to a male WAPO reporter?
DeleteNever tried it. My Dad thoroughly ingrained in us that camping was OK as long as there's a tiled bath with toilet connected to a sewer adjoining the sleeping area.
ReplyDeleteI love camping! I grew up camping, took my kids camping. My husband and I quit camping after our kids left home. About 8 years ago, we rediscovered it. At age 57, it's one if my favorite things to do! I have also rediscovered my love of hiking and go at least 2-3 times a week. I recommend both activities!
ReplyDeleteAmen. I know that the preponderance of evidence says we've evolved from a common ancestor, and I have no issue w/that. BUT, unlike that common ancestor, I relish warmth, a soft bed, a hot shower, and freedom from insect and rodent bites. Others can have at it. Not my bag.
ReplyDeleteI have camped all over the US. Loved it! However, I don't think I will be spending any more time tossing and turning on the ground trying to burrow my way into a comfortable position so I might get a half hour of sleep ever again. Now I dream of an RV or even a pop-up or even a recycled school bus. I like warm water to bathe in these days too.lol Funny how one's priorities change a little when you get older.
ReplyDeleteYou didn't have to convince me. I already preferred my own bed and sitting in my easy chair rather than sitting on a tree stump.
ReplyDeleteI love to camp!! I camp in luxury. I plan great "foil" meals, no hot dog on a stick! Nothing like a hearty breakfast then pack some sandwiches and explore for the afternoon. Back at camp throw on my foil dinner. Then have a few drinks by the fire along with a little guitar and singing. When it's time for bed I crawl into my cozy tent with a double loft mattress (got one last year and it's awesome, I can swing my legs over and stand because it sits so high of the ground). Gave my son our old queen. We all sleep like babies. Nothing like snuggling with your honey in your cozy bed looking at the stars. Yea!
ReplyDeleteWant to get a teardrop or pop up when our son's grown so we can travel anytime, anywhere and not be tied down to school vacation schedule. We joke how that will be our retirement home--a camper.
Foil dinners?! My convection oven in my RV works just fine :)
DeleteSissypants!
ReplyDeleteLOL
I'm with you Gryphen,
ReplyDeleteGone are the days of tent( most of the time without a tent) camping. Gone are my days of winter camping( yes people there is such a thing) and teaching winter survival. Today is a new day and age where my 45 ft custom motorcoach has ALL the amenities at hand, including the nicest king size mattress available :). Hiking is fine, hunting is fine, I am just no longer dealing with SLEEPING in the outdoors I love so much.
When you're old enough and smart enough you come to appreciate the real definition of 'vacation' is 'the suspension of exertion.'
ReplyDeleteThe best grade of fun is the kind that overtakes you when you weren't planning anything.
I think this is why people who criticize Alaskans are secretly jealous. Sarah literally had one of the most idyllic and wonderful childhoods, in a beautiful place.Sure, we all fished and camped like she and her family did. But fishing in Kansas is not fishing in Alaska.
ReplyDeleteSo when you read some hate piece about Alaskans, desperately trying to being ugliness to beautiful lives there, think about what the hater secretly covets and what the victim has had all her (their) life.
Camping got real old, real fast for my husband and I. We used to go every summer to the Poconos, Delaware Water Gap and Jim Thorpe. He still takes camping trips from time to time, loves fly fishing and this thing called "tire flipping" but I'm happy under my own roof, sleeping in my own bed, making s'mores in the fireplace.
ReplyDeleteWe still do a lot of hiking, mostly day trips. It's great exercise, it grounds me and it wears out our dogs excess energy.
Camping (in a camping lot) is a cheap summer alternative to hotels in my country. It's not about nature, it's about making traveling and visiting places affordable.
ReplyDelete"Wild" camping is strictly forbidden in my country, since most of the wild campers are people who think they're special and above the rules - and that's the worst litterers. We don't have much unadulterated nature around, so legislation tries to preserve what's left of it from the common assholes.