Michigan woman pulls out firearm during altercation over school supplies in Wal-Mart. But don't worry, she has a valid conceal carry permit.

Courtesy of Slate:  

Back-to-school shopping can be stressful but shoppers at a Walmart in Michigan saw that stress take a violent turn after an argument over a notebook ended with a gun being drawn. It all happened on Monday afternoon as two pairs of women were shopping in the town of Novi, near Detroit. One of them reached for the last notebook on a shelf as did another woman. That invariably led to arguments about who was the rightful owner of that precious notebook and some pushing and shoving ensued. When two women, one aged 46 and the other 32, moved on to hair pulling, the mother of the 20-year-old who was involved in the altercation pulled out a loaded gun.

“She pulled out her firearm and tells them to stop attacking her daughter while pointing the gun at them,” Novi Police Detective Scott Baetens said. “It was a senseless act of violence all the way around.” Police are now working with prosecutors to try to determine whether the woman’s actions could be classified as self-defense. She had a valid concealed gun license. 

Of course the woman who pulled the gun ended up with the notebook because that is how you get what you want in America these days. Apparently.

I can't believe that police are trying to determine whether this is an act of self defense or not.

The woman introduced deadly force into a hair pulling fight.

It should ALWAYS be against the law to threaten to end a person's life over a fucking back to school notebook. Period!

Finally a protest that I can get behind 100%.

Arkansas, Tennessee, and Alabama round out the top three for Black Friday brawls.

Courtesy of WRCB: 

Arkansas and Tennessee top the list for Black Friday fights. Arkansas tops the list at number one, followed by Tennessee and Alabama. Missouri ranks in at number 5. 

Shoppers love saving money, but when it comes to Black Friday, some Midsoutherners go to extreme measures to get those hot items. Experts said there is a way to save money while staying safe.

Yes there is a way to save money and stay safe, DON'T go shopping on Black Friday. (More brawls here.)

Wait until Cyber Monday, that way you still get great deals and you can shop in your pajamas from home.

Who wouldn't rather shop in their pajamas?

Oh wait, I forgot about the Wal-Mart shoppers.

Did anybody else happen to notice that the map up above closely matches this one?

Anybody else completely unsurprised?

It's Black Friday! Everybody take cover until it blows over!

So it is Black Friday which I will celebrate in my traditional fashion, by not buying one single damn thing today.

Nice try corporate America but if you want me to participate in the shopping equivalent of the Hunger Games you're going to have to offer something a little more tantalizing than 40% off of big screen TV's. (Besides I already have a big screen TV.)

After all I'm a guy, and as a guy this is essentially my caveman like approach to shopping:

"Ugh me need clothes."

Three months later:

"Ugh me still need clothes."

Then another six months after that:

"Ugh me all out of clothes without holes, must go shopping now."

At the store:

"Ugh these clothes next to entrance. Good enough, me buy."

Later at home:

"Ugh hate all of new clothes, me still wear old tattered clothes instead. What's on TV?"

That essentially it, only sometimes it is more primitive.

So you all enjoy your day of allowing big business to manipulate you into acting like animals. I will be right here at home, eating, sleeping, and scratching myself.

You know like an animal, but one who still has money on his credit card.

Video of massive Black Friday crowd outside Urban Outfitters.

Seriously aren't we better than this?

Allowing retailers to turn us into animals fighting over table scraps is pathetic.

Here is another one from yesterday featuring fights and at least one arrest.

What it's like to be a black teenager in America.

Hey, the kid is walking around in a hoodie while being blatantly African American, what did he expect?

You know as a white guy. born and raised in Alaska, just about the whitest place on earth, I have NEVER experienced anything like this, and seeing it kind of makes my heart ache.

I think the kids handled it just right, and actually maintained a pretty positive and humorous attitude. 

I would be interested in what Publix has to say about their policies after seeing this on the internet.

Ex-Victoria's Secret model creates God inspired clothing line. I thought that was what Nuns were wearing?

Courtesy of Today:

Kylie Bisutti, a former Victoria’s Secret model who left her runway career because it conflicted with her faith, has launched a Christian line of clothing she hopes will help spread religious beliefs, particularly among today’s youth. 

“With all of the bullying that goes on nowadays, I really wanted to have clothing that focused on uplifting kids and verses that would maybe put a smile on someone’s face if they were having a bad day,” Bisutti, 23, told TODAY.com.  

God Inspired Fashion, the clothing line she co-founded with her aunt, includes numerous women's styles, including skinny jeans, tank tops, peasant skirts, blazers, and scarves, while the men’s collection features T-shirts and button-down tops. Clothing for children and toddlers also are available. 

Each article boasts a biblical verse or motivational phrase, such as “Trust,” “Fear God” or “The Lord is My Strength.” Bisutti said she hoped the words would inspire “someone sitting in a classroom who read the verse on the back of someone’s shirt or jacket, or intrigue them enough to ask a question about its meaning.” 

Bisutti said she developed the line after growing frustrated with her own search for Christian clothing beyond hats and T-shirts. 

“I couldn’t find blazers or stuff you can wear to a business event, or something cute for girls or guys to wear at school," she said. 

Do you know WHY this woman could not find clothing with Bible verses on them? Because that is what crazy people wear.

And if she thinks that walking around looking like a billboard advertising Christianity will keep somebody from being bullied, well I have some bad news for her.

I checked through the site by the way and found the clothing to be very modern, somewhat revealing, and not exactly designed for your usual, never miss a church potluck dinner, Christian.

Personally I find this kind of "in your face" religiosity to be very off putting, and though it may attract interested consumers along the bible Belt, I am not sure that in this day and age, with more and more young people abandoning the church, that it will find a large enough consumer base to support the company.

Besides if Ms. Bisutti, REALLY wanted to start a line inspired by God and the Bible, wouldn't THIS be more appropriate?

Honestly does she really think that the founders of Christianity would be cool with halter tops and skinny jeans?

Pretty sure that would be a stoning.

John Fugelsang obliterates Wal-Mart in a humorous, yet factually accurate, rant.

Courtesy of Current:

“Chinese-made products, the money you spend doesn’t stay in the community and the staff is so poor your taxes subsidize their health care. The Dow is at record highs and minimum wage buying power at a forty year low. Walmart – prices so nice, you pay for’em twice.” — John Fugelsang

Damn, that was good!

Betty Bowers reporting from the front line of the "War on Christmas."

Wow Betty is pretty serious about going after those who do not provide the proper respect for Christmas.

Hmm perhaps she would like to know about a certain GOP Chairman who seems to have missed the memo about the conservative approved view points on Jesus' totally made up birthday.

"Happy Holiday season?" Oh boy, is SOMEBODY about to get some Republican "clean" coal in his stocking this Christ's birthday morning!

And this is why I do NOT participate in Black Friday shopping opportunities.

You know I remember watching nature videos of army ants swarming over vegetation and unfortunate insects, and rapidly devouring them completely. That had NOTHING on this.

It's scenes like this which reminds us just how uncivilized we can become under the right circumstances.

For fucks sake they're just phones!

(Source)

Photographic evidence that even Sarah Palin reads National Enquirer stories about her family. Update!

Courtesy of TMZ:  

It's been 4 years since Katie Couric grilled Sarah Palin about where she gets her news ... and now, we finally know -- the National Enquirer. 

The former Vice Presidential candidate was hangin' out with her daughter Bristol in a Kmart in L.A. this weekend ... when she decided to check out the magazine stand. 

Palin eventually picked up the latest copy of the Enquirer ... possibly because the cover featured a photo of Bristol under the headline, "Plastic Surgery Shockers." 

I cannot imagine that too many of you are surprised by these pictures. After all Palin, and her family, live their lives as if their primary goal in life is to be written about in the National Enquirer and other gossip rags.

In fact I was told by Palin's own head of security that Palin read celebrity gossip magazines on airplanes almost exclusively, whereas other Governors he had worked for (Governors Tony Knowles and Frank Murkowski) read daily briefings and used the time to prepare for meetings and important upcoming votes. I have also heard that before she was tapped as McCain's VP the waiting room of her office was stocked with the most current issues of People and Us magazines. Apparently Palin was ALWAYS more interested in the lives of celebrities than she was in doing her job.

By the way TMZ did get one thing wrong.

They identified that Palin was at the store (Apparently purchasing toilet paper, which is weird since there have GOT to be stacks of the two Chuck's books lying around the compound just waiting for somebody to wipe their ass with them.) with Bristol, when in fact that is Willow standing next to her waiting for Palin to determine if that brand of tissue will prove too rough for her delicate dried up lady parts.

Update: Here is another picture of Willow looking just thrilled to spend time with her mother.

Are they checking my blog again?

President Obama demonstrates his disdain for Christmas by shopping for....Christmas presents?

Well clearly it must be a trick.

Just like he is subversively demonstrating his anti-business bias by pretending to support the American economy through his purchases.

I'm sure Sarah Palin, or Rush Limbaugh, could see through the facade to its deeper, anti-American agenda.

And you know what? I'm sure they will have something to say about it to.

Because that is just how much they hate this man.

Update: Courtesy of The Obama Diary.

It looks like the President ran into a couple of younger shoppers today as well.



I guess they don't realize that he is destroying their country. Or perhaps they are just too smart to waste their time watching Fox News.

"Attention Wal-Mart shoppers, you have just been pepper sprayed!" Welcome to the 2011 version of Black Friday.

"Quit being such a baby! It's a food product, essentially."

Courtesy of the Guardian:

Shoppers in the US kicked off their annual "Black Friday" orgy of consumerism amid scenes of pushing, pulling, running and – in one case – pepper-spraying their way through the doors of the nation's shops and malls. 

The annual tradition, when many stores open early with cut-price sales on the day after Thanksgiving, has become a source of controversy amid frequent scenes of near-rioting and injuries as mobs of people crowd into big-name shops. 

But few can have expected even the most determined of bargain-hunters to adopt the brutal tactics of one female shopper in a Los Angeles suburb who attacked her rivals with pepper-spray: a substance more recently associated with police brutality against Occupy Wall Street protesters. 

At least 20 people, including several children, were injured as the woman deployed her weapon. "I heard screaming and I heard yelling. Moments later my throat stung. I was coughing really bad," said Matthew Lopez, a shopper who recounted his story to the Los Angeles Times. 

The woman, whom witnesses said appeared to be defending an X-Box games console, has not been found or yet identified. Perhaps unsurprisingly, the gigantic store remained open amid the mayhem and other shoppers continued to roam the aisles filling their trolleys with goods. 

The incident occurred late on Thanksgiving evening as the Walmart – like some other stores – had pushed back its Black Friday opening to begin late on Thursday.

You know it's stories like this that make me wonder what the hell is wrong with people?

I mean here we are in the year 2011, so intellectually evolved that we have created a virtual Utopian society (For those that can afford it), and yet under the correct circumstances were are still capable of such incredibly primitive responses we might just as well still be in the back of a cave fighting over a Mastodon leg.

Personally this whole Black Friday thing is something that I avoid like the plague. I like to save money as much as anybody else but will not sacrifice my dignity by standing in the freezing cold for hours outside of a big box store, nor sacrifice my humanity by trampling my fellow human beings just to save a couple of dollars.

On Christmas day I would like to proudly stand up and tell my family members, "I may have spent more than I should have, and perhaps I did not get you the top of line gift that you asked for, but I can assure you that none of your fellow human beings were sucker punched, pepper sprayed, or tasered in the purchase of these items. "

Of course that kind of thinking may place me in the minority. But oh well, when I have I NOT been in the minority?

Yet another indication that Sarah Palin will NEVER be taken seriously agian.

S. P. Bra, named after a certain politician. It's pretty, it works hard, separates the left from the right and moves the masses. Not bad for a bra. The S. P. is our go to everyday bra. Good for hunting, boating, public speaking and basically going rogue. Softy contoured cup for modesty and shaping. Jacquard textured fabric with mesh band. Underwire. 32-36 B-D

This is an actual advertisement for a bra sold by an online company called Bounce.

Obviously there is nothing wrong with a company marketing a line of clothing with a certain type of customer in mind.  Happens all of the time

However the addition of the phrase "separates the left from the right and moves the masses" certainly makes it appear that they are poking more than a little fun at Snowdrift Snooki.

In my opinion, and people are certainly welcome to disagree with me on this, when a company selling bras feels that it is open season for mocking you, that is a pretty clear indication that nobody views you as somebody they see in a leadership position.

Gee I wonder why when the executives of this company thought of Sarah Palin it immediately took their mind to the subject of "boobs?"

Could it be because of these boobs?

Or perhaps it was these boobs?

Well at least that second set of boobs aren't completely fake. Well I guess that is not entirely true, now is it?