Thursday, March 27, 2008

New Bible says Eve was a slut and that Goliath wasn't stoned, he was drunk.

Goliath is a celebrity binge drinker, Eve is a sex-obsessed man-eater and Noah's wife wants to kill him . . . welcome to the updated Bible.

An Anglican vicar has rewritten the most famous biblical tales because he wants to make them more "accessible" to modern readers.

I have waded through the Bible twice and I just have to applaud any attempt to make this convoluted, overwrought tome more accessible.

I can never quite fathom how such a poorly written book could possibly have helped to create such a large religious organization. No wonder the believers have to meet every Sunday and have it explained to them.

1 comment:

  1. So what was Samson? A 'roid raging vanity man obsessed with his hair? Delilah was just trying to get him back in tune with reality, but he couldn't even face himself without his mane, he'd rather be blind?

    Hey, I just don't think some literature works no matter how many re-writes it gets. I kind of enjoy torturing myself once in awhile gutting through a chapter, thinking in terms of "myths & legends". But the whole book(s)? I'd rather re-read Hemingway (and he is my most UNfavorite american author).

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