So finally Sarah Palin is finished licking her wounds after being excluded from all the "fun" in Cleveland, and has taken to Facebook to try and make it all about her again.

Courtesy of the "Cersei Lannister School of Mothering" graduate's Facebook page:

"Make America Safe Again" Convention - So Far, So Good . (Really? What convention is she watching?)

From 3000 miles up North, it's good to hear the GOP Convention is going well. It should strengthen faith that real hope and positive change can be on the way for the next generation. (Once again, WTF?) 
 
I hear the convention TelePrompTer was abandoned during one speech last night, harkening back to the 2008 VP Nomination speech when the GOP Convention TelePrompTer let me just let 'et rip. (Oh God, not the teleprompter lie again.) Funny, while I was just now looking up '08 media coverage of that broken TelePrompTer during my speech, it appears the lamestream media lied about the issue then, and still lies about it. The more things change, the more they stay the same with the LSM still just "making things up!" (And they wonder why they're so distrusted and despised?) Because I have a life and I ignore the media haters (Ha!), I'd been unaware all these years that reporters denied the TelePrompTer glitch ever happened. (Well of course it's a lie that she was "unaware," but the accounts saying the teleprompter was working were from eyewitnesses in the audience that night.) Silly, silly irrelevant reporters... did they really think some campaign speech writer fed the TelePrompTer my ad-libbed comments like the "Hockey Mom & Pitbull with Lipstick" joke? (Actually yes. they did.) 
 
Have a great day, America! Thinking of you under Alaska's penetrating summer sun and today's 70-degree forecast up here in God's country! (Well she got this part right, it is hotter than hell up here right now.)

 - Sarah Palin

Personally I think that Palin smeared sugar or chocolate on her lips to get Trig to kiss her like that. 

Or maybe Trig simply finished his anger management classes and can now be next to his absentee mother without trying to knock her block off.

Poor kid.

Speaking of the not so poor kids, people have been asking me if Track Palin is in jail.

No he is not.

Or whether of not he is in some inpatient substance abuse program.

Again, no.

He may be attending some outpatient therapy, as directed by the Veteran's Court, but currently from what I have been told he is free to walk among his fellow woman beaters in Wasilla. (Remember in the Mat-Su Valley one in two women are the victim of domestic abuse.)

Track's next court date is on July 25th, but I have little doubt that it is only a formality as mommy has already fixed everything so that her first born will never have to face the consequences of his actions.

If I were a member of that family I would always sleep with my door locked. Because really, it's only a matter of time. 

Cartoon of the day.

Mocking the moron.

A great way top start every morning.

Sarah Palin dredges up old attack against the President for using teleprompters, from a speech she read from a teleprompter, that was put in place JUST FOR HER! Update!

Palin's speech at CPAC yesterday was full of one liners.

And she received plenty of laughs.

She made a joke about her fake breasts:

Oh you should have seen what Todd got me for Christmas. Well, it wasn’t that exciting. It’s a metal rack, a case for hunting rifles to put on the back of a Four-Wheeler, then though, I had to get something for him to put in the gun case, right? So this go-round, he got the rifle, I got the rack.

She got big laughs over that, especially when she followed it up by going down on a Big Gulp.

Classy lady, don't you think? 

She also received a huge response when she went all "birther" at the idea of having more background checks for gun owners in order to save more innocent lives: 

And background checks, yeah, I guess to learn more about the person’s thinking and associations and intentions. More background checks? Dandy idea Mr. President – should have started with yours. 

Nothing makes the folks over at the Right Wing tent revival laugh harder than the idea of making fun of a plan to stop gun violence while simultaneously suggesting that the President is not a US citizen.Yep, that's a knee slapper.

But perhaps it was Palin's old, overused joke about the President using a teleprompter that demonstrated the bone chilling depth of her hypocrisy:

Mr President we admit it, you won. Accept it. Now step away from the teleprompter and do your job.

Seriously, does anybody even laugh at this anymore? Well they certainly did at CPAC. You betcha!

But here's the thing, THIS is what what was standing in front of Palin as she read that joke.

That's right folks, those are teleprompters directly in her line of sight.

But that's not all. According to Wonkette, those teleprompters were not there for everybody: 

But, her most ridiculous moment of all ridiculousness had to be when the jabbering hockey-momming-lip-glossing-pit-grizzley-bullying 2008 reject read an Obama-Teleprompter joke, throwing out there a tired four-year old remark to the effect, “Hey Mr. President, its time to step away from the teleprompter and do your job.” Nothing new here, just some old rotted raw meat for the crowd, like the rest of her speech, but the amazing thing was, she read her Obama teleprompter joke FROM A TELEPROMPTER. 

Yes, just before she was to take her turn with the talky-hatey thing, something very odd happened, for the first time all day. The stage crew appeared and set up … teleprompters. NO ONE had used them up to this point, they weren’t even on or near the stage for anyone else at all. Not even Michele “one L, two crazy eyes” Bachmann had used a teleprompter til then, but Sarah had to have them, because her speech was too long to have written on her hands. Talk about your choots-pah! 

CPAC crew installs teleprompters right before Palin's speech.

Okay so get this. The most hypocritical woman on the planet, ACTUALLY had teleprompters installed JUST so that she could slam the President of the United States for using teleprompters.

You know due to the fact that some people consider me something of an expert on Sarah Palin I have been asked more than a few times just how low she is willing to go?

After seeing this, I think you all can see that that question quite literally has no answer.

Update: Okay seriously Sea O'Pee?

 I have never been more insulted as an American in my life.

Rick Santorum says "it should be illegal to read off of teleprompters." However turning our country into a theocracy he's perfectly okay with.

Courtesy of TPM:

 "See, I always believed that when you run for president of the United States, it should be illegal to read off a teleprompter. Because all you're doing is reading someone else's words to people."

You know the reasoning behind this is that Santorum has swallowed the Republican attack on Obama as somebody who cannot speak well without a teleprompter, even though the evidence does not exactly back that up.

Let me tell you what will be the worst day in Rick Santorum's life if he were to get the GOP nomination. That would be the day he had to face off in a debate with the brilliant President Obama without benefit, for EITHER of them, of preparation, teleprompters, or crib notes.

I guarantee that by the end of that debate Santorum would be reduced to a disgusting frothy mixture.

And you can take THAT to the bank!

You know it really damages President Obama's credibility that he constantly uses a teleprompter. I mean it is not like EVERYBODY uses a teleprompter. Right?

What am I thinking?

Clearly THESE people are using the teleprompter in a very pro-American, pro-Capitalist  manner. Unlike the President who always uses it like a sneaky Socialist.

Busted! Sarah Palin is caught using dreaded teleprompter in her home studio!

From the delightful Sarah Jones over at Politicususa.com:

So anyway, last week while watching “Sarah Palin’s Alaska”, I could have sworn I saw a teleprompter on her home studio camera, but I didn’t care enough to do a screen grab. After all, there are so many lies to deconstruct and so little time. But then last night, as I was watching the latest episode (which I must confess is now a fun distraction from her tweets), she was showing us her studio in the house she built next door to her home on Lake Lucille. Sarah and Todd were making a show of how it was just the two of them putting on her little show. And while she made cute and Todd told her her hair was above his pay grade, I saw the evil socialist machine staring me down, clear as day. So clear that I could read the logo. Yes, a teleprompter.

Who makes Ms Palin’s teleprompter? Autoscript. The number one selling teleprompter. The gold standard in teleprompters. The elite, if you will, of teleprompters. The farthest cry from the “poor man’s teleprompter” as you can get.

Oh am I loving this!

Look I am not even going to bore you with my take on this story.

I am simply going to urge you all to click the link and head on over to Politicususa and read what "the other Sarah" had to say about this delightful revelation.

And while you are there please take a moment to give her a nice word or two for a job very well done.

Gee I wonder how the Grizzled Mama will feel about her hypocrisy being exposed like this?

Jesus Todd! Why didn't you tell me the teleprompter was in the flippin' shot?

Hey is she reading off of what I THINK she is reading off of?

Watch CBS News Videos Online

Busted!

The first impressions of Palin's show "Real American Stories" are coming in. It turns out Americans ARE heroes, but Palin is a dud.

LA Times:
As a host, Palin brings little besides her name and all that it has come to mean. Despite her time on the campaign trail and in front of often-unfriendly cameras, Palin still has an eyes-locked-on-the-teleprompter stiffness. (What?  She used the dreaded teleprompter? I can hear little Teabagger heads all over the REAL America exploding at the very thought!)

Certainly there’s nothing wrong with having a show devoted to inspiring people, as the daytime talk shows have known for years. But it’s hard not to see Palin, who, after abdicating her own governorship is hardly an icon of stick-to-itiveness, as using this platform, and these people, to further the idea that she has a special relationship with “real Americans.” Which makes anyone who finds her less than enchanting at best a heartless cynic and, at worst, a traitor. (Ouch! That has to sting!)

The Washington Post:

The debut on the Fox News Channel of Sarah Palin's "Real American Stories" Thursday night turned out to be like one of those shows that's on when nothing's on and yet there is air to fill -- like infotainment you sometimes see on empty channels in hotel rooms, or the stuff that's playing on the little TV screen at the gas pump nearest the rental-car center. What are we watching exactly? (A commercial? News?)

Just for fun.

HuffPO has a blow up of the writing on Sarah's hand!

It looks like she wrote the words "Energy", "Tax" and "Lift American Spirits".

Okay which one of you ret...oops...idiots said it was only an "ink stain"?

Oh an please click the title and visit Hufington Post so that Stefan Sirucek does not get upset that I "borrowed" his picture.




By the way I think Sarah is kind of pissed that we caught her looking at her "hand held teleprompter".

Either that or she is giving herself the angriest self breast exam I have ever seen.