Here are statistics courtesy of RAINN (Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network):
About Victims
44% of victims are under age 18
80% are under age 30
Sexual Assault Numbers
Every 2 minutes, someone in the U.S. is sexually assaulted
There is an average of 207,754 victims (age 12 or older) of sexual assault each year
Reporting to Police
54% of sexual assaults are not reported to the police
97% of rapists will never spend a day in jail
About Rapists
Approximately 2/3 of assaults are committed by someone known to the victim
38% of rapists are a friend or acquaintance
It is NEVER okay for anybody to put their hands on a loved one in anger. And violence done by men to the women in their life hearkens back to a time when men viewed women as property to do with as they please.
I have spent years teaching women how to defend themselves, and I can tell you that women do not have to put up with this kind of abuse, and once empowered they rarely do.
If you know somebody who is being abused, do NOT stay silent. Their lives may depend on the actions you take on their behalf.
If you are woman in this situation get out! You are a worthwhile person deserving of love, not abuse.
And if you are a man who feels that he is demonstrating his machismo by keeping his woman in her place, YOU are what is wrong with my gender, and all you have proven is that you do not deserve to call yourself a man. And if you really want to prove your manhood I am sure their are plenty of big burly men in your area willing to give you a shot at the title.
However don't be surprised if you end up being the little "bitch" on the ground getting taught to stay in YOUR place.
Oh and by the way this is not the ONLY way that men brutalize women. They also brutalize them by taking away their reproductive rights, by making sure they always see themselves as second class citizens, and by attempting to make them forever reliant on a man.
Describing this video as disturbing doesn't come close to the horror. I can't type more because of the tears in my eyes.
ReplyDeleteDon't forget emotional and verbal abuse. When it comes from a family member, it can do just as much damage in the mind of a victim. In fact, sometimes you feel as if you have been physically abused, it hurts that much.
ReplyDeleteThank you for posting this.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for bringing this to our attention. I have a friend who is in an abusive situation but demands her friends stay silent. It makes our hearts hurt for her every day. I hate being silent as I fear one day she may not survive her abuser. Any suggestions would be very appreciated as to how to not be silent and still keep her friendship intact.
ReplyDeleteReport the abuse to the police or to other authorities. You can request anonymity.
DeleteDo NOT stay silent. What is a dead friend worth? It would be better to lose your friend if she ever found out that you reported the abuse, but you will never be able to live with the guilt of having been silent, when you could have done something, once it is too late.
PLEASE report the abuse!!!
It's awful that your friend is being abused but she is extending the cycle and unintentionally abusing you and your friendship. I suggest you tell her how much you are hurting and that you feel compelled to report her situation to the police. Let her know you value her friendship too much not to take action.
DeleteAs a mother of a daughter who was in an abusive marriage, I could never say anything nice about the man. I was very matter of fact about how horrible she was being treated, and how it was unsafe for her and her children.
DeleteI didn't realize how much it must have sounded to her that I was criticizing her for staying. My husband on the other hand (who married me long after my daughter was an adult and never raised her), simply always told her how wonderful she was, and how much happiness she deserved. He would tell her how much he admired her (in very serious, specific ways). She would be in tears hearing all the good things about herself (and I would be crying to, when I realized that was exactly what she needed to hear--not my judgement).
Provide information about resources, offer her a listening ear, offer her specific assistance that you are willing to give. Please don't say let me know if there is anything I can do, if you are not willing to do "anything". But if you are able to help her with transportation, willing to babysit, willing to let her stay with you (could put you at risk too), let her know exactly what you are willing to help with. A person cannot make a plan if they don't know what their options are.
Tell your friend that you love her.
Gryphen
ReplyDeleteYou must watch this hilarious clip of Ralph Reed interviews Lego hair . All i saw and heard was her wig , LOL , waiting to see if it would fly off.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lasnbxd_Wc4#at=12
Our local city has the dubious honor of being the incest capital of our state.
ReplyDeleteI know, from working with them, that 16-year-olds, made pregnant by their father, uncle or brother, are more often than not thrown out of their home, become homeless with a newborn infant, and have no resources other than some sort of public housing, or sharing with another teen mother in a rat-infested, run-down tenement. My major effort is to provide basics for these babies when they leave the hospital. NO ONE ELSE DOES -- warm clothing for the infant, an infant thermometer, a quilt, bottle, formula, a quide to taking care of children, as well as a book to read to the new infant -- all in a backpack that can serve as a diaper bag. These girls have nowhere to go and no where to turn.
If the option of abortion had been presented to them -- to abort their father's child, or their uncle's, you better believe they would do so. Is that evil? Or was the evil perpetrated against these teenagers worse? While theologians and fat, white politicans debate the issue, these girls need to get away from their abusers and the product of their abuse. And go on with their lives, if they can.
I could not watch the video past the moment, when he tore the dish rag out of her hands...
ReplyDeleteI would apologize for the brutality of the video but that is kind of the point.
ReplyDeleteTo elicit an emotional response and to help us to remember that though Keira Knightley is simply an actress helping to pull something from the shadows and into the light, there are millions of women around the world for which that scene is a monthly, or weekly, or even daily part of their lives.
It might hurt to watch, but imagine if it were your reality.
This picture on Twitter seems to depict the kind of pig that would do such a thing:
ReplyDeletehttps://pbs.twimg.com/media/BOljqmWCMAAVeAf.jpg:large
He's apparently demonstrating in support of some GOP-controlled state restrictive women's health or rights legislation.
(P.S. It was suggested to me in a followup Tweet that the person holding the sign might be a WOMAN. Good gawd.)
Thank You, Gryphen. I tried my best to teach my daughters that they don't need a man to define who they are, and my son the test of a true man is in how he respects and treats all women.
ReplyDeleteLove shouldn't hurt, ever.
And not a single rethuglicon within 10,000 miles gives a single sh** .. Not one... The more and worse women are battered the better for them.. More to control... More to boss around.. More to pump their chests up... The more it makes them macho...
ReplyDeletePIGS.
Oh my god, I didn't expect that. It made me sick, and frightened for women everywhere.
ReplyDeleteMy dad was a cop in the big city in the 50s thru the 80s and saw a lot. He had 5 daughters, and reminded us always that if a man raised his hand to us, we were to go home to him immediately. Any guy we dated knew my Dad would beat the crap out of him if he hurt one of his daughters. I wish every young woman had a father like mine, who would teach her that she deserved respect.
I have never met my wife's father; she lives estranged from him due to his abuse of my mother-in-law, and she currently lives with PTSD due to the abusive behavior of this man.
ReplyDeleteI try to make sure that my daughter never has to deal with this from any man, first of all by being the best father I can be, and second by providing an example of how much someone should love her with the example of how much I love her mother.
Thank you for sharing this.