I remember taking a class on childbirth back when my future permanent roommate was just a tiny belly bump and a generous. and much appreciated, swelling of her mother's breasts.
During the class we were shown a video of a vaginal childbirth and I had much the same reaction depicted in the video above. Afterward they also showed us a caesarian birth and I, a huge fan of horror films, suddenly felt faint and had the almost overwhelming desire to flee the country.
Fortunately for me the birth itself was nowhere near as traumatizing, and I managed just fine.
Of course it kind of helped that the purple slimy thing that emerged from my once upon a time favorite place was my own child and that she looked up at me with baby blue eyes that immediately stole my heart.
And it remains stolen to this day.
The anti-choicers who harangue women by telling them "it's just 9 months of your life" and "it's no big deal--just give the baby up for adoption!" ignore how very traumatic pregnancy and childbirth are on a woman's body. If you think it's awful to watch...try living it. Particularly without pain meds.
ReplyDeleteYup..I had 12 hour labors, and no meds. The second child was eleven and a half pounds, and I felt like an elephant. But his birth was actually easier than the first, and he was, and is, a delightful human being, as is my daughter.
DeleteWe saw a childbirth film in Health class in 11th grade, and I think it was better contraception than all the talk the teacher could dream up.
12 hrs? Pshaaw! 36 hours here. No drugs. I would like to see a man do even 2 hours.
DeleteIf you want to see men in labor, you're gonna love this!
Deletehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gw5ayibQ-E0
As a freshman in college, I watched a black and white childbirth video. I didn't even see it through the end, but had to flee to the restroom before I fainted and throw water on my face.
DeleteAt 61 years old, I can say that my choice to be child free was the wisest decision I ever made. I count my blessings that I never had children with my ex-husband, considering our emotional and financial stability in our 20s and 30s--and the economy and social support networks were much better then.
6:31 - I saw that and laughed so hard I cried!
DeleteNot to mention the lifelong trauma that many, if not most, girls and women experience from being separated from their newborns by agencies operating on behalf of the U.S.'s multibillion-dollar adoption industry.
DeleteSee firstmotherforum.com for more on this topic.
Sweet . . . . .
ReplyDeleteHeh heh. I remember when I was giving birth to my first child, when it finally came time to push, they started wheeling this mirror around so I could watch. I was like "no thank you!" They seemed surprised. "You don't want to watch?"
ReplyDeleteI said, "Uh, I never look down there and I'm not about to start now." :D
My baby still has his blue eyes.
Just had my first, three months ago, and I can't imagine forcing someone to go through that experience, especially a young girl. I was happy to be pregnant, but that was because I really wanted a baby. But if I DIDN'T want one? Holy shit! I would have been miserable!
ReplyDeleteIf men had the babies, there would be no population since Cain, or was Abel the first born?
ReplyDeleteBeaglemom
I also remember them wheeling the mirror so I could watch, and I did not really want to - I had been in heavy 'back labor' for 41 hours, and was simply exhausted, but somehow still had the power in me to push my baby out. It was the most painful time of my life (no meds, my choice), but it was sooooo worth it.
ReplyDeleteThe funny thing is, I work in a hospital, and whenever I walk through the FMC wing (Fetal Maternity Care), and walk by 'that' mirror, my mind always says 'that is where the babies come out of', LOL!
I delivered one of mine........per request......from my wife......she said it was the best of the four she gave birth to......I didn't realize how excited I was.....when she asked me what it was.....I said (as she tells the story)........."It's a BABY".....!
ReplyDeleteCall me old school, but after watching the birth of my first son, I was incredibly moved, but didn't want to go through watching the agony, and all the gory stuff again.
ReplyDeleteLet the midwife, sisters, aunties, and cousins help out, and tell me when the little one is ready for a visit, then come get me! :)
First of all my gaydar was going off on these dudes. I'm guessing the video was made for entertainment by some cheap reality tv comedy production.
ReplyDeleteAnd Gryphen, I am disappointed that you chose to post such a trivial take on the first most momentous life experiences we share (the second being death).
When learning of our pregnancy my beautiful young wife said to me "You helped get it in there, and your going to help get it out". No hospital, no doctor, no mid-wife, just us!
So in that way both of our children were born.
Birthing is momentous, powerful, sacred, and should not be treated as entertainment, nor its responsibilities be avoided.
To the men I suggest become informed, participate, share your child's entire life as much as possible.
To the women, remember nature has given you the blessing and strength for natural birthing.
Suggest reading "Birth Without Violence" and "Spiritual Mid-Wifery"
Whoa, whoa, whoa Captain Judgmental.
DeleteI will have you know I stuck it out to the bitter end and snipped the cord while still standing on my wobbly legs.
However to suggest that this experience is not potentially terrifying for the male participant would be an incorrect statement of fact.
Kudos to you Gryph for hanging in there for the entire beginning.
DeleteWhere exactly did I suggest "this experience is not terrifying"?
The intended gist of my reply was to recommend the father-to-be become informed and participate.
Knowledge is a good antidote to fear and enables one to mindfully engage in the present moment. Fear disables rational thinking by projecting into the future, many times brought on by lack of information.
No wonder most men don't think childbirth is no big deal when all they normally see is a cleaned up morsel of flesh in pretty little warm blankets! I agree, the initial exposure is pretty gross, but the big blue eyes are a definite bonus!
ReplyDeleteMy husband was there for each pregnancy, every test, every one of those times he felt he could be of assistance, and I appreciated every moment of it, except for the time he thought bringing a movie camera into the delivery room was a "good idea" without asking me first.
ReplyDeleteWhat amazed me every time, was the moment they heard their dad's voice, they had already known it and the bond was undeniable and instant. I think it's seeing that region of the body doing something totally different than what he'd become accustomed to that shocked him MORE than the kids being born.
AnitaW, I experienced the same thing: our boys recognized Mr. B's voice, that is. He did NOT bring in a camera, choosing to stay up next to my head, singing whatever Frank Zappa songs seemed relevant ("I'll be coming shortly, because I am a portly...").
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