Britta Hanson gave her daughter a safe word to protect her from her father Track Palin's temper.

Britta Hanson with Palin at Governor's picnic.

Courtesy of The Blast:  

Track Palin‘s ex-wife got a protective order against him to keep her and the couple’s 6-year-old daughter safe, and also created a safeword to use in case the child needed to be secretly saved from the troubled man. 

According to documents filed in Alaska by Britta Hanson, and obtained by The Blast, Hanson agreed to a secret phrase with 6-year-old Kyla that would alert her mom if she needed to be picked up from Track’s home if she felt she was in danger. 

Hanson would know there was trouble if Kyla asked her, “Mom, can you sing me a bedtime song?” Hanson says that on November 25, she went to pick Kyla up after staying the night with Track, and when she showed up he was enraged, allegedly “cussing and yelling” and “grabbed me and pushed me into the wall” when she began to record on her phone. 

She says he took their daughter and headed to the home of Sarah and Todd Palin, and she followed. 

Hanson says Kyla went to hang out with Sarah, and she confronted Track with his father, Todd. She says Track flipped out, started throwing tools and threatened to beat up Todd.

Hanson says after the November incident, Sarah, Todd, and herself agreed that she would drop Kyla off at their house in the future, and Track could spend supervised time with his daughter. 

She also says the night Track was arrested for attacking his father, she received a call from Piper Palin informing her of the situation, and locked herself inside her house with her family in fear that Track may come after them. 

She says their daughter is not safe with Track. Hanson also lists in the document that he has committed an act of domestic violence against the child, but does not give details.

Gee, I can almost hardly wait for the Palin troll to show up and start lecturing all of us about what a good guy Track is, and how all of this is a recent development.

It's not. This is who Track Palin has been for over a decade now, and unless he gets help he is going to kill somebody.

And that somebody could even be one of his own children.

As we reported before Britta DID get that restraining order and baby mama number two Jordan Loewe was granted a change in her custody agreement.

According to the Daily Mail, Todd, Sarah, and Willow have all also taken out restraining orders against Track. 

P.S. I know that some of you want me to post about Willow's engagement, but I do not consider that actual news and will not do so here on IM. Sorry.

Update: Track Palin now has a lawyer.

I'm keeping my eye on this case for any further developments, and as of yesterday Track finally has a lawyer assigned to his case.

The lawyer is one Patrick Bergt, and he does not appear to be any of the numerous lawyers that the Palins have used in the past.

Which more or less reinforces by contention that Track is not getting any help from his family at this time.

In fact it's quite possible that Bergt was assigned to the case as a public defender, though it does not specify that in the Court View documents.

Whatever the case I do not think that Track has a steady source of income, so if I were this Bergt character I would make sure to collect my fee up front.

There is a bail hearing at 1:00 today so Track may soon be out and ready to go finish Todd off by 2:00 PM.

Update: Courtesy of the Daily Mail:  

Things are quickly spiraling out of control for Track Palin following his arrest on Saturday at his parent's home in Alaska. 

Court records show that on Monday his ex-wife Britta Hanson filed a petition for a protective order against Track. 

Britta, who is the mother of Track's 6-year-old daughter Kayla, was granted a short-term order by the judge and will be back in court early next month to try and get a long-term order keeping her ex away from her and possibly their daughter. 

At the same time, Track's ex Jordan Loewe also filed an emergency motion to change the child custody agreement that is in place between the couple. 

Track and Jordan are the parents of a son Charlie, who is almost two. 

The part about Britta we report the other day, but that Jordan Loewe part I did not see at Court View.

Well even if Track manages to get out of jail today, it appears unlikely that he will spend his Christmas with any of his kids, or probably even with any of his family.

Update 2: Just as we suspected Track never finished his court ordered rehab from the 2016 incident.

Courtesy of ADN: 

Track Palin, the son of former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, opted not to finish a therapeutic court program for military veterans to address a 2016 domestic-violence arrest. 

Police arrested him last year for punching a woman in the head and threatening to fire a rifle. He was charged with fourth-degree assault, interfering with the report of a domestic-violence crime and possessing a weapon while intoxicated. 

But rather than pursuing a traditional path through the court system, Palin chose an alternative sentencing agreement through Anchorage Veterans Court, according to his attorney and the Anchorage district attorney. 

Veterans Court offers eligible service members reduced or dismissed charges in exchange for going to weekly hearings and undergoing treatment — counseling, substance abuse programs — available through the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. 

"We don't force anybody. You have an option," said Rick Allen, who coordinates the program through his position as Anchorage district attorney. "It's a major time commitment. You're going to have to do lots of rehab stuff, you're going to have to do constant (urine tests). It's a major ordeal." 

Apparently Track's excuse is that he had work commitments at some oil company. 

I seriously doubt this employment thing, but even if real since when do job responsibilities take precedent over completing a treatment program to avoid jail time?

Amid accusations of violence toward the mother of his second child Track Palin files motion to modify child support payments to the mother of his first child.

So yes according to Court View Track reopened his first child custody case and filed a motion to modify his child support.

Since it would be the rarest of rarities for a father to reopen a case to increase his child support, and this IS a Palin we are talking about, I think it is safe to assume that Track is reducing his support payments.

So is this a coincidence that the case reopened on the day that Radar Online reported that Track's parents have washed their hands of him, or is losing THAT support in fact the reason that Track can no longer meet his financial responsibilities?

Remember this comes on the heels of Britta Hanson modifying that custody agreement back in March of last year when she heard that he kicked the shit out of Jordan Loewe, his newest baby mama, in a drunken rage.

At that time Track lost overnight visits with Kyla Grace as well as a significant amount of his time during the day with her, and he has never been granted that time back.

Now I know that the Palin troll will be here spinning her bullshit about how the Palins are good parents, and that Track is some kind of special case.

However if you are even a casual Palin watcher you know that is definitely not true.

And one needs to remember that Track could have received help for his substance abuse and out of control behaviors several times along the way, but at every opportunity to get that help his mother interfered and kept him from facing the consequences for his actions.

Seriously the best thing for Track Palin right now is that he get arrested for some crime that hopefully does not leave anybody dead, and that he finally receive the counseling and substance abuse therapy that he has clearly needed since he was a teenager.

Currently this young man is a danger to himself, and to all of those around him until that happens.

Due to his recent arrest for domestic abuse Track Palin's ex-wife severely restricts the time he spends with his daughter.

Courtesy of Radar Online:  

Sarah Palin’s son, Track, is having a bad year! Two months after his domestic violence arrest, RadarOnline.com has exclusively learned that his ex-wife took him to court to cut down on his custody away of their daughter.

Britta Hanson, who married the former Governor’s son in 2011 and divorced him a year later, filed documents for custody modification in Alaska on February 6, 2016, just days after his January 18 arrest. She requested that her husband have no overnight visits and only see their daughter, Kyla Grace, 4, four days a month, according to court documents obtained exclusively by Radar.

Apparently before Track demonstrated his machismo by treating his girlfriend like a punching bag he had no set schedule supposedly to accommodate his work schedule, though for the life of me I can't think of one mention that he was even employed.

However those days are no more as the schedule Britta demanded in court, and Track signed off on back in February, essentially gives him almost no time with his child.

The first week, he has their daughter on Saturday, from 9am to 6pm, and Sunday, from 9am to 3pm. The second week, Track has Kyla Grace on Friday, from 7:30am to 7pm, and on Saturday, from 9am to 6pm. 

“Weeks three and four Father will have no visitation,” the documents state. “Father will have no overnight visitation.”

Well good for Britta.

I mean it's always unfortunate to keep a child from seeing their father, but in this case Track has proven to be an unpredictable and possibly dangerous person for Kyla to be around.

Okay let's take stock shall we?

Bristol just failed to get the custody agreement she wanted with Levi, and adding insult to injury will also not be paid the support that she demanded from the man who she once labeled a "deadbeat dad."

As if that wasn't bad enough she still has another pending custody case with Dakota that's guaranteed not to go her way either.

Track is facing jail time for punching and kicking his girlfriend, and waving around a firearm, while under the influence of alcohol.

Todd is still recovering from an almost fatal snowmachine accident, that quite likely happened while he was impaired as well.

Sarah Palin's plans to hitch her wagon to Donald Trump's star was severely hampered by the aforementioned incidents, and now it looks as if he is sabotaging his own campaign anyhow.

Really if it wasn't for Palin's upcoming Judge Judy ripoff reality show she would have not one thing going her way.

Which of course means that the show will likely NEVER happen, because let's face it the universe is not yet done punishing Sarah Palin. Nor should it be.

No Track Palin did not cut brake lines on school buses, and other misinformation about the Palins.

So several people sent me this link  

yesterday: just ask me I am happy to repeat that yes they are. I will gladly tell how Sara's son and also his Best friend who was Bristols Boyfriend at the time and their gang vandalized our bus barn in our community that had just been refurbished and given a beautiful facelift. They broke several windows, broke in stole stuff and broke windows in some of the buses as well and busted water pipes etc. They caused thousands of dollars of damage just to be asshats that was years ago but I am still angry about it. 

I will glady say how Sarah is a racist piggy oink and how Bristol was a brat when she was younger and is still a brat. 

Oh I can confirm it all and more.

So yes this is in fact one of the things that Track got into trouble over, and which his mother had swept under the rug.

However this is all he did. He did NOT cut brake lines on the buses. Despite what you might read on the internet.

And while we are at it let's clear up a few other bits of misinformation swirling around the web as well.

Track's daughter, Kyla Grace Palin, that he had with Britta, IS in fact his kid and not one of Bristol's from a previous unannounced pregnancy.

In fact one of the reasons that I first suspected she was pregnant, after that quicky wedding up at Hatcher Pass, was because Dennis Zaki happened to see her in either a Wal-Mart or Carrs in Wasilla and she was clearly pregnant. (This was well before those baby shower pictures showed up online.)

Let's see what else?

Oh.

No Bristol NEVER had mono. This was confirmed by Mercede quite a few years ago, and reconfirmed by several sources since.

It was featured in the original Daily Kos story as the reason that Bristol missed so much school in Anchorage, but so far I have been unable to determine if even that part was completely accurate.

Speaking of Bristol she did NOT name Tripp after Shailey Tripp.

He was named after the character Trip Carlyle, in one of Levi's favorite movies, Supercross.

It is just another one of those crazy coincidences that seem to occur around the Palins with alarming frequency.

And finally no Bristol has not already given birth to her newest baby bump. And yes she is indeed pregnant.

As far as I have been told the blessed event is not until some time in December.

And no I don't secretly know who the father is, and I have heard that Bristol is not telling anybody anything.

And one more thing, I NEVER said that "the truth about Trig's birth is too terrible or shocking to tell." That was attributed to some other person several years ago and for some reason I have been saddled with it despite several corrections.

Oh, and I don't have any evidence that it is accurate either.

Just a final thought for all of you to keep in mind.

People say all kinds of things on the internet, and often they are total bullshit.

Just because somebody says something with authority, and I don't bother to correct it, does not make it a factual statement.

A Palin sighting in the wild. Update!

This was taken by a friend of the blog last Friday atop a small mountain commonly referred at "The Butte" in the Mat-Su Valley.

Though it may be somewhat difficult to tell from the picture I have it on good authority that the person on the left is Bristol Palin and the one on the right is a girl whom she called "Britta." That would lead me to assume that it is Track's poor abandoned wife and that the little one in her backpack is the grandchild of Sarah Palin's that she rarely ever refers to, Kyla.

Britta in happier times.

To tell you the truth I was somewhat skeptical and kept asking if they were sure that was who it was. And that was when they sent this photograph.

And then kept talking to me as they passed right on by, climbed into it, and drove away.

So I guess we know for sure that Bristol now drives a Camry.

Just in case you are wondering why Tripp was not with them, he spent the weekend camping with his daddy and new baby sister.

So this is not explosive news by any means but it is kind of interesting as Sarah Palin sightings are virtually nonexistent in and around Wasilla and even the kids are only seen sporadically.

It really WAS really nice last Friday. In fact I also spent several hours hiking around Campbell Creek myself that day.

Update: Apparently Bristol's hiking buddy was Kandice Palma.

Hmm, I wonder why Bristol kept calling her Britta?

Activist Dan Savage denies that HIS totally gay marriage is the reason for the breakup of Track Palin's totally shotgun marriage.

Courtesy of America Blog:

Dan Savage gets married to his boyfriend right before Sarah Palin’s son get divorced from his wife. Clearly another heterosexual marriage destroyed by the homosexuals, if you ask me. Oh the humanity! 

Though Dan is now categorically denying that his “gay” marriage several days ago to his longtime boyfriend-in-America-husband-in-Canada Terry Miller had anything to do with splitting up the Palins (this is really from Dan, he just emailed it to John): 

“Hundreds of other same-sex couples have married in Washington state since Sunday. It’s true, of course, that every time a same-sex couple marries, a straight marriage collapses. But there’s no proof that my marriage caused the collapse of Track Palin’s marriage. It could’ve been some other couple’s marriage, or perhaps it was the collective weight of all the same-sex weddings that have been performed in Washington state since Sunday that doomed the Palins’ marriage. We are not trying to evade responsibility here—being married is all about assuming responsibility—but I feel this effort to blame us is baseless.”

While I have little doubt that all of these gay marriages will endanger hetero marriages all over the country (Because gay marriage just looks like so much more fun than boring old traditional marriage), I think Dan Savage can rest assured that HIS marriage had absolutely nothing to do with the end of this story book marriage. (And by "story book" I mean the whole thing was probably a myth.)

Instead the marriage I would blame for the end of Track's marriage is the marriage between his mother and the guy she tricked into marrying her.

Let's face it the marriage started off on the wrong foot with Sarah and Todd getting married in August 1989, and Track coming along only less than eight months later. (And I won't even go into the questions surrounding his parentage.)

Then it seems to have gone downhill fast with dozens of eye witness accounts of an uninvolved mother and a father who was off working in the oilfields almost half of ever year, who often arrived home to a house without food and piles of laundry on the floor.

The arguments that Track witnessed are legendary, and the behaviors he demonstrated in response to that turmoil is still whispered about throughout Wasilla. Essentially the kid never really stood a chance.

Apparently Palin felt that shipping him off to the military and creating a myth about his super soldier status would change him and make him more cooperative, but clearly that did not happen.

So can anybody really be surprised that THIS marriage did not survive?

Hmm, perhaps if Britta had been able to use SarahPAC funds to pay Track to stay with her she could still have the "happy" union that Sarah and Todd enjoy today. (Just thinking outside the box.)

No Mr. Savage your marriage had nothing to do with this unfortunate circumstance. In fact it could be argued that if Track had been able to grow up in the home of somebody as loving and committed as many of the gay couples getting married today, he might have turned out to be an entirely different young man altogether.

Track Palin sure has his priorities straight. Guns first, kids last.

This according to TMZ:

 Track Palin and his soon-to-be ex-wife Britta filed divorce docs which tick off who gets what. 
-- 23-year-old Track -- an Army reservist -- gets the $30,000 Wells Fargo bank account, $500 in tools, and his $1,000 gun collection. 

-- 22-year-old Britta gets her $2,500 bank account and her $4,000 in jewelry. 

According to the doc, Track rakes in $42,800 a year -- and has agreed to pay $642 a month in child support. Track and Britta have agreed to split any other child-related expenses, including medical and travel. 

Britta gets physical custody, and will share legal custody with Track. 

Jesus, what a guy.

So essentially Track gets off scott free with his cash and his toys, while Britta gets the responsibility of raising their child, some trinkets, and a piddly $2,500.00. Damn she got screwed when she got pregnant, screwed when she was forced into a Wasillabilly shotgun marriage, and screwed again in the divorce. Poor kid.

Okay does anybody have any idea how Track earns $42,800 a year as an "army reservist?"

From what I could find online he should only be making a fraction of that. I know they get more when they are on active duty overseas but it is almost impossible to find out how often, if ever, he was actually deployed.

And since we're talking about this topic, HOW in the hell does he only have to pay $642 a month with that kind of steady income while Levi had to pony up $1,750 a month when his employment was anything but steady?

Oh that's right, Track didn't hire Rex Butler to represent him.

Well anyhow all I can say is that Britta is lucky to get away from the family at such a young age when she still has years to recover mentally. Let's face it living with, or around, the Palins must be like visiting a mental hospital for the criminally deranged.

Hopefully she can raise Kyla as far away from their influence as possible.

In a surprise to absolutely NO ONE, Sarah Palin's son Track has filed for divorce. Update!

Courtesy of TMZ:  

Sarah Palin's oldest son has pulled the trigger on his marriage by filing for divorce ... TMZ has learned. Track Palin and his wife, Britta, jointly filed divorce docs in an Alaskan court. 

Under Alaska law, by filing together, they are signaling they have fully settled property and custody issues, including child support. 

As for custody, the now ex-couple has a 1-year-old daughter, Kyla. One interesting point ... Track and Britta had to watch a 48-minute video about the impact of a failed marriage on the child. 

Okay let's see, married in May 2011, and divorced by December 2012. And they said it would never last.

Gotta love those Palin family values.

But hey, at least this one got married.  So that's something!

Well so much for the familial bliss that the Palins tried to paint with this photograph.

Just like Track to refuse to pal along with the Palin family myth making machine.

Update: According to Radar Online, Britta is not exactly broken up over the news:

"I'm fine with it," Britta told Radar about the end of her short-lived marriage. "We just filed the papers so we aren't divorced yet. I'm not sure how long it will take to get the divorced finalized.

It sounds like Britta is glad to out of the marriage, and away from that family.  Hmm I wonder if SHE would like to write a book?

20/20 to broadcast a behind the scenes look at Dancing with the Stars, which will also examine the amazing weight loss experienced by its contestants. ALL of its contestants?

Click image to see video

"It's impossible NOT to lose weight."

Really?

You know I get a lot of flack from the Palin-bots when I assert that Bristol was more than likely pregnant while she appeared on DWTS, but to my mind it is the ONLY possible explanation.

Here is a recent picture of Bristol showing her at her current weight.

Are we to believe that today she does MORE exercise than she did on DWTS? You heard them say in the tape that "you can't go to the gym and get this. You can't run on a treadmill and get the same exercise you get from dancing."

Yet by the end of Bristol's time on the show she came away looking like this.

Bristol Palin November 23, 2010. After coming in third on DWTS.

Now I have mentioned before that I was once a personal trainer, and I can tell you once again that this is an absolute impossibility. And Bristol's contention that she was a high school athlete who was used to MUCH more rigorous exercise than what she was exposed to on DWTS is ridiculous on its face.

But here's the thing that REALLY bothers me about this.

The Palin family has done something like this multiple times now, and they seem to ALWAYS get away with it!

From Sarah's fake pregnancy.

To whatever the hell THIS was at the Republican convention in 2008.

To the dancing with the stars debacle.

Sarah Palin and her "golden child" have pulled off these pregnancy scams right under the noses of the American people while almost DARING the media to call them out on it.

But due to the fact that it is a subject which seems to tread in an area of great discomfort, NOBODY has ever seriously confronted either one in an interview about what should seem pretty obvious to just about anybody who has been paying attention, which is that the Palin women either go out of their way to pretend their ARE pregnant, go out of their way to pretend they are MORE pregnant, or go out of their way to pretend they are NOT pregnant!

In fact it almost seems that having a regular pregnancy in the Palin household is against family tradition. (Isn't that right Britta?)

Personally I feel this is part of some bizarre need of Sarah's to manipulate the truth, that she somehow manages to force her family members to imitate, either by example or, more likely, through manipulation and threats.

The first "pregnancy," (Sarah's) was most likely the result of a crisis situation, but what has happened since seems like a systemic expression of some family pathology.

What are your thoughts?

At least ONE of Kyla Grace Palin's grandmothers loves her.

The good grandmother, Elizabeth Hanson, is the one on the left.

Courtesy of Radar Online:

In an exclusive interview with RadarOnline.com, Britta Hanson’s mother Elizabeth expressed her delight over her first grandchild. 

“Kyla Grace is great. She’s beautiful,” the proud first-time grandmother said. “I’m very happy,” she gushed about the new baby. 

Her daughter Britta, 21, gave birth to Kyla Grace on Saturday, August 6 just three months after marrying Track Palin, 22, Sarah and Todd Palin’s oldest child. 

“I love my daughter and my son-in-law very much,” Hanson told RadarOnline.com about the overjoyed new parents. 

Elizabeth Hanson spoke briefly about her family’s relationship with the Palins. “They’re their own people; we’ve known each other for a long time.”

Well I am glad that at least SOMEBODY in this screwed up family knows how to honestly share their feelings about this precious child.  Good for you Mrs. Hanson!

It looks like Kyra will have access to at least some sane family members. You know Tripp could have had that too if Bristol and Sarah weren't such...well you know.

(H/T to Joe McGinniss.)

Welcome to the world Kyla Grace Palin! Update!

Mommy-to-be, Britta Palin, surrounded by Kayla's gifts from the baby shower.

This from the blog of Joe McGinniss:

Sarah Palin’s son Track and his new wife Britta became the proud parents of a baby girl, Kyla Grace Palin, last night.

I learned last summer that Joe has EXCELLENT sources, so if he says that this baby was born last night, you can bet that his information is correct.

Okay let's see, Track and Britta got married in May, and this wonderful bundle of joy is born in August, which is approximately three months later. WTF?

How is it that these Palin women have the fastest human gestation on the planet? Do ALL women in Wasilla get pregnant and give birth in only two or three months, or is that only the people in this family?

By the way here is the official announcement from Sarah Palin.

Update: Well it looks like Radar Online found somebody close to the family to confirm Joe's tip:


A source close to the family confirmed the arrival of the little girl to the young parents who were married just three months ago in May.

Just for the record let me say that I never had any doubt that McGinniss had the straight poop. He made a lot of good friends in Wasilla during his stay and he hears all kinds of things.  As you will all learn for yourselves when his book comes out in September.

The latest Palin family pregnancy makes it to Real Time.

Courtesy of Medaite:

“Sarah Palin in the news this week– became a grandmother again, or for the first time, who knows?” he joked, likely a reference to the conspiracy theories surrounding the birth of her fifth son Trig, though if alluding to that, this would be Palin’s “third” grandchild, so the joke didn’t exactly make sense. He clarified that the child was not Bristol’s, and then added exasperatedly, “do they not have condoms up there? When they say ‘don’t retreat, reload,’ they are not fucking around.” And, as no Palin bashing is complete without an intellect joke, he concluded, “If Bristol Palin really wanted to teach her family about abstinence, maybe the place to put that information wasn’t a book.”

By the way it is has been a week since I first reported that Britta was pregnant, and so far NOTHING from the Palin camp. It kind of makes you wonder if they really thought NOBODY was ever going to figure this out or not?

Wow, it looks like Track Palin's wife made out like a bandit at her baby shower!

For any of those who are STILL not convinced that Britta is pregnant.

It looks like Sarah's next grandchild is going to be extremely cute, if his parents are any indication.

Once again I wish them nothing but good luck.

Remember how everybody just assumed that Track Palin married his girlfriend because she was pregnant? As it turns out everybody is pretty damn smart.

So to bring you up to speed on May 19, I wrote a post about Track and long time girlfriend Britta Hanson tying the knot up at Hatcher Pass.

My assumption at the time (and the assumption of every other rational person with at least two brain cells they can rub together), was that based on the history the Palins have with marriage and pregnancies, Britta was undoubtedly "in the family way."  However nobody was absolutely positive such was the case.

About two weeks later I received a tip that Britta was indeed pregnant and that fellow students in her nursing classes were all talking about it, and the family was afraid it would soon come out. Then not much later I received yet ANOTHER tip saying that Britta was definitely with child and was avoiding certain casual friends so that the word would not get around and embarrass the families.

Yet it was still all hearsay and I did not feel it was enough to say definitively that the quickie marriage was due to the impending birth of yet another baby into the Palin family.

That is it WAS all hearsay until I received this picture in my email inbox of Britta opening up gifts at her.....wait for it.....baby shower. (Apparently the shower took place just a couple of days ago at the Palin compound in Wasilla.)

So based on the tips mentioned above, and this photographic evidence, I think we can safely move this story out of the rumor category, and into the "no shit" category.

So what have we learned here today kiddies?

Number One: That there is a 90% probability that any rumor you hear about the Palin clan will turn out to be true. (Even the crazy ones.)

Number Two: That Bristol is the world's WORST abstinence spokesperson since she could not even convince her own brother's girlfriend not to have premarital sex. ("Stop! Stop it right now, Track! Dammit I'm telling Mom!")

Number Three: That the Palins simply DO NOT get married unless there is a fetus and a loaded shotgun involved. Sarah's mother, Sally Heath, was pregnant when SHE got married, so was Sarah, and then Bristol (Who did not even bother to get married.), and now Britta.  Apparently it's a family tradition.

Not that there is anything wrong with that of course. Well that is unless your future mother-in-law is constantly pimping herself out as a family values fundamentalist Christian savior of America, and your husband's sister is a famous abstinence spokesperson. But whose crazy ass family does that descr....oh yeah, almost forgot!

Well anyhow I wish both Track and Britta nothing but good luck with the new addition to their family.

Based on what we know of the rest of the family, you're going to need it.