Seriously, is there anybody more predictable than Sarah Palin?

So yesterday I posted about Palin jumping on a Fox news story about a faux "War on Christmas" and stated that she was using it to drum up interest in her ghostwritten future bird cage liner.

I discerned this by using what I call the "No shit Sherlock Principle,"  which essentially states that every cause or news story that Palin weighs in on must benefit her in some way ("What's in it for us?" Todd Palin.)

So to assist me in proving my point Palin just had her Facebook ghostwriter post this:  

Yesterday I posted an article about how school officials in Wisconsin told their choir director to scale down the “Jesus” songs in their Christmas program. 

 So now kids can’t sing about Christ at Christmas? 

Stories like that compelled me to write my new book. Coming out in November, my book “Good Tidings and Great Joy” will address issues just like this. But I do more than just describe the problem; I tell you how to fight back against those politically correct Scrooges who seem to hate not just a beautiful holiday, but an entire faith. These solutions are interwoven with stories about our Christmas traditions, my family’s recipes, and personal photos. 

Then she goes on to tell you exactly where you can go to throw your money away on her poorly written book, on a topic that she clearly does not understand. 

I can only imagine that there will be more of these posts and attempts to pour gasoline on the "War on Christmas" meme in order to agitate the paint chip eaters and get them riled up enough to actually believe that Palin has ANY solutions for solving the non-existent problem.

Personally I am waiting to find out if there will be another book tour to accompany the publication of this book.  I find it hard to believe that Broadside books (Which of course is a conservative offshoot of Harper Collins.) would be willing to spend too much money on a book that will probably sell most of its books in bulk orders to conservative groups funded by the wealthy political puppeteers.

Considering how small the crowds were for her last book, this time around it might well be in the single digits.

In other words, I REALLY hope they have one.

It has not even hit the bookstore shelves yet and ALREADY Palin-bots are trying to give Sarah Palin's newest ghostwritten book away.

This was posted over at the Sea O'Pee yesterday: 

Donate $60 or more to SarahPAC and you will receive an autographed copy of Good Tidings and Great Joy: Protecting the Heart of Christmas. The book will ship on the October 29, 2013 publishing date and regularly thereafter.

Yes just give $60 to Sarah Palin's PAC dedicated to paying hush money, funding family vacations, and supporting her plastic surgery addiction, and we will send you yet another poorly written book on subject that she simply does not understand, which is being sold at Amazon for only $13.79.

Now THAT is a deal only a Palin fixated paint chip eater could love.

You know if I didn't know any better I might JUST think that the people over at SarahPAC were having trouble attracting donors and were desperate to bring in more money.

But that can't be, can it? I mean haven't those people been telling us for years that Palin is this incredible political force, a unique voice among conservatives, and would someday run for President and teach us all a lesson?

Yep, that's what they said alright. Gee, I wonder what went wrong?

Sarah Palin posts new pictures on her Facebook page to celebrate "living vibrantly," or to say "fuck you" to her SarahPAC donors. You decide.

Palin flashes the Hawaiian "Shaka" sign which apparently the only thing she learned during her stay on the islands for college before fleeing back to the mainland to escape all of those Asians.

"Hey Todd, remember when we used to work for a living before we realized how easy it was to scam the stupid people into giving us money for doing nothing?"

Okay now I KNOW that this is supposed to be simply some fun pictures that Palin shares with her supporters to make them feel more connected, but since it comes LITERALLY the DAY AFTER she kisses up to them and begs for more money, it seems incredibly insensitive and arrogant.

After all these pictures kind of put this statement. "I want to thank all of you who have donated your time, hard-earned money, and efforts to support SarahPAC. We have accomplished an incredible amount together over the last two election cycles" in a completely different light. (Yeah thanks for the money, we could never have had such awesome vacations without it!)

On the other hand for those in the media who have called Palin out for using her PAC as a slush fund for her family, and for paying her staff, this could not be more welcome.

Thanks Sarah! Once again you have inadvertently helped us to prove our point.

(Pictures courtesy of Cactus Annie's Facebook page.)

Update: Oh I forgot to include this one.

"See I'm still the mother of a special needs child (Stop hitting me you little shit) now send me money."

After suffering one of the worst fundraising periods ever, Sarah Palin decides to start kissing up to her few remaining supporters.

"Hey y'all, still love me? Then prove it by sending a check."

This was posted over at the Sea O'Pea this morning: 

I want to thank all of you who have donated your time, hard-earned money, and efforts to support SarahPAC. We have accomplished an incredible amount together over the last two election cycles, and we somehow did it without the help of the "wise" sages from Washington’s permanent political class. In fact, we bucked them every step of the way and achieved incredible tangible results. (Yep with your help the Teabaggers have all but broken the Republican party. Way to go!)


Your support has given us a platform to articulate a commonsense conservative message to counter those who only go along to get along with an invasive and corrupt big government. (In other words "Those who want to actually do the job that their constituents sent them to Washington to do.") And most important, your donations have allowed us to highlight, support, and elect great conservatives (By "elect great conservatives" does she mean Jason Smith of Missouri, who was the ONLY candidate to receive financial support from SarahPAC this time around?) who are leading the charge daily to save our country. (And by "save" she means "flush it down the toilet.")


Together, we’ve achieved many victories, and I look forward to even more in next year’s elections, as we will continue to hold both parties accountable. 

Thank you again for your continued support, (Please don't stop sending me money!) and don’t let the critics or the media get you down when they try to intimidate (inform) you. They wouldn’t be making such a fuss about SarahPAC supporters if they weren’t aware of how much you have accomplished and how important your support is to changing D.C. (Oh yeah, without that $5000 to Jason Smith, Washington would be a MUCH different place.)


Just remember – if we weren’t making great strides in breaking up their mighty establishment, they wouldn’t waste time attacking us. (Well I had a few minutes, so I thought why not?)


With an Alaskan heart,

 That was followed by her signature via autopen.

A couple of things.

First I think this is one of the VERY rare times that Palin personally had a message ghostwritten for her to encourage the paint chip eaters to keep sending her money. You can essentially smell the desperation emanating from this missive, which makes sense now that Palin is wasting more money than SarahPAC is bringing in.)

Second it should be noted that this plea for money comes on the heels of a money bomb set up by the P-tards just a few days ago, which only serves to underline just how desperate Snowdrift Snooki is to keep the morons stuffing cash into her virtual g-string.

And finally I think she needs to do away with that "Alaskan heart" bullshit.

We now know for a fact that if this idiot has a heart, and the jury is still out on that, it is an Arizonian heart, NOT an Alaskan heart.

Try signing off with THAT next time Cactus Annie.  See how much spare change you attract then.

Apparently Congressman Darrell Issa works for Rush Limbaugh.

"What am I supposed to do here Rush?"

Courtesy of Politico:  

Rush Limbaugh on Wednesday charged that House Oversight Committee Chairman Darrell Issa went soft on IRS official Lois Lerner. 

“Issa basically let her get away with it,” the conservative talk show host said, according to a transcript. “She’s gone. He looked clueless, like didn’t know what was going on, didn’t know how to deal with this.” 

Limbaugh’s comments came after the House Oversight Committee held hearings concerning reports that the IRS had targeted conservative groups with extra scrutiny. Lerner, the director of the IRS division in question, tapped her Fifth Amendment rights to not incriminate herself at the hearing, declining to answer further questions after asserting that she had done nothing wrong in an opening statement. Later on Wednesday, Issa said Lerner will be called before the committee again, telling POLITICO that the Fifth Amendment doesn’t hold after she gave a statement. 

“When I asked her her questions from the very beginning, I did so so she could assert her rights prior to any statement,” Issa (R-Calif.) said. “She chose not to do so — so she waived.”

NO, she DIDN'T waive anything! As Lawrence O'Donnell had pointed out on his show last night her initial statements do not negate her ability to plead the fifth.

And what is more the Congress, which is bulging at the seams with politicians who have law degrees, undoubtedly KNOW THAT!

So WHY is Issa threatening to bring Lerner back?

Because the average conservative is too stupid to understand the law, and they get their information from this asshole:

After IRS official Lois Lerner pleaded the Fifth Amendment during Wednesday afternoon’s House committee hearings on the agency’s intentional targeting of conservative groups, Rush Limbaugh took to bashing the woman as someone “filled with rage” who he can easily envision as a sadomasochist. 

“I can see her with whips and chains. This is not a happy woman. This is a woman that is running around filled with rage. And they all are, folks. They’re angry all the time. They’re never satisfied. And no matter what they get, it’s never enough, they always want more. They exist in a permanent state of being enraged.”

I am assuming that this "they" who Limbaugh keeps referring to are either liberals or women, or perhaps a combination of the two. Either way it indicates an incredible amount of prejudice and lack of intelligence. And yet THIS is the go to guy when Republicans politicians need advice on what to do.

So Issa, terrified of upsetting millions of paint chip eaters, is going to call  Lois Lerner back in front of the committee.

Gee I wonder how she will respond?

Can you say "Waste of government time and resources?" I knew that you could.

Tea Party group tries to draft Sarah Palin to run for the Senate seat from Alaska. Boy somebody is a slow learner aren't they?

Courtesy of US News: 

"Do the words 'Senator Sarah Palin' excite you?" 

(Should I answer that?)

That's the opening line of a recent email by The Tea Party Leadership Fund, which is trying to draft the former Alaska governor and past Fox News commentator to run for the Senate in 2014. The fund argues Palin has a clear path to victory in part due to recent polling showing incumbent Sen. Mark Begich, a Democrat, with less than 50 percent of the vote. 

But, it being a draft, the group hasn't talked with Palin about whether or not she's interested. And Palin – whose PAC didn't respond to request for comment from Whispers – is believed to be currently residing in Arizona, not Alaska. The fund's Niger Innis says the interest of Tea Party members in a Palin run, however, is clear. 

"We didn't know that [the draft] was going to catch fire to the degree that it has. And what that tells us is that this is just the beginning," he says. "It's gone viral." 

But not all Tea Party groups are enthused about drafting Palin without first gauging her interest. 

"I absolutely love her and I think she's a breath of fresh air," Amy Kremer, head of Tea Party Express, tells Whispers. "But until she says that she's going to put her name in... we're not going to go out there and advocate for her to get in the race."

You know you would think that after Sarah Palin strung these poor dipshits along for almost four years they would finally come to realize that she does NOT want a job in politics.

She wants to be given money for doing as little as possible, NOT have to work for a living!

So they can draft away to their heart's content, but Palin will do NOTHING but shake her flabby money maker at them until their credit cards are maxed out and then suddenly decide that she has too many "family responsibilities" to return to politics now.

But I know ONE person who would be thrilled to see Palin make a run for the Senate seat, and that's Mark Begich. Right now our lone Democratic Senator's poll numbers are in the shitter, but run Palin against him and suddenly we are talking landslide.

Just a friendly note to the Teabaggers, Alaskans flat out HATE Sarah Palin! So if you really think that recruiting her will mean one more GOP vote in the Senate, then YOU, my paint chip eating friends, have not been paying attention, now have you?

Jon Huntsman compares the Republican party to China. Well there goes THAT political career!

From Buzzfeed:

Huntsman, the former Utah governor and once President Barack Obama's Ambassador to China, expressed disappointment that the Republican Party disinvited him from a Florida fundraiser in March after he publicly called for a third party. 

"This is what they do in China on party matters, they punish you, if you talk off script," he said. 

Huntsman said he regrets his decision to oppose a 10-to-1 spending cuts to tax increase deal to cut the deficit at the Iowa debate lamenting: “if you can only do certain things over again in life.” 

"What went through my head was if I veer at all from my pledge not to raise any taxes…then I’m going to have to do a lot of explaining," he explained. "What was going through my mind was 'don't I just want to get through this?'" 

That decision, Huntsman said, "has caused me a lot of heartburn.” Huntsman jokingly blamed his failed candidacy in part on his wife, Mary Kaye, who told him she'd leave him if he abandoned his principles. 

“She said if you pandered, if you sign any of those damn pledges, I’ll leave you,” Huntsman recounted. 

"So I had to say I believe in science — and people on stage look at you quizzically as though you're was an oddball," Huntsman said, explaining why he was "toast" in Iowa.

You know Huntsman was the ONE nominee that the Obama administration feared, because they knew that in the general election he would be able to attract the moderates and that he could wage a campaign that would make the President's reelection an uphill battle.

Of course they didn't need to worry, since the Republican party of today could not being themselves to actually nominate a candidate that had the credential to do the job.

I have to say that I really like the idea that his wife told him that if he signed any of those ridiculous GOP pledges that she would leave him. Can anybody imagine Ann Romney telling her husband that he was pandering too much? Nope, not me either.

I guess I can admit now that it's all over that I really liked Jon Huntsman.  He had balls, and he did not act like an imbecile to gain the support of the paint chip eaters, and Civil War reenactors that seem to run the Republican party these days.

He had something else going for him as well...hmm now what was it?

Oh well it'll come to me.

Sarah Palin destroys myth that she is an "energy expert" and wishes the most painful punishment imaginable for Roger Ailes.

Today Palin gave an interview to Andrew Breitbart's rapidly deteriorating website Big Government.

I am not going to go line by line because essentially it is the same old crap on a new cracker.

However there was a question that Palin answered SO incorrectly that it should remove ANY doubt in rational people's minds that she does not know her skinny ass from a hole in the ground, when it comes to oil production and its effect on gas prices in America.

BNN: "Obama claims that his domestic energy policies do not affect prices at the pump because oil is bought and sold on the world market, which determines the prices. True?"

Gov (Half term quitter) Palin: " False. Totally false. What determines the price of oil is “supply and demand.” If you increase the supply, you will see downward pressure on the prices at the pump, just as we’ve seen with natural gas. We know from past evidence that even the news of more areas being opened for future drilling has an immediate effect on the price of oil as the markets respond to the news of a future surplus."

No THAT is completely and demonstrably false. And it illustrates perfectly why Palin is the LAST person on the planet that anybody should go to for information concerning energy policies in this country.

Here is the truth from the Detroit Free Press:  

A statistical analysis of 36 years of monthly, inflation-adjusted gasoline prices and U.S. domestic oil production by the Associated Press shows no statistical correlation between how much oil comes out of U.S. wells and the price at the pump. 

Political rhetoric about the blame over gas prices and the power to change them -- whether Republican claims now or Democrats' charges four years ago -- is not supported by cold, hard figures. And that's especially true about oil drilling in the U.S. More oil production in the U.S. does not mean consistently lower prices at the pump. 

Sometimes prices increase as American drilling ramps up. That's what has happened in the past three years. Since February 2009, U.S. oil production has increased 15% when seasonally adjusted. Prices in those three years went from $2.07 per gallon to $3.58. It was a case of drilling more and paying much more.

This not a case of there being a difference of opinion between the Left and the Right in this country, this is a case of one side getting their information from research and statistics, and the other getting their information from ideological morons who are funded by people like the Koch brothers to purposefully spread misinformation.

Later in the same interview Palin was  asked about these remarks made yesterday by the President of Fox News Roger Ailes:

During the Q&A with two student journalists following his remarks, Ailes took on Gingrich head on. He said Newt was simply angling for a job at CNN. And he attacked the notion that he had hired any of the GOP politicians to help their political prospects, coming as close as he's ever gotten to confirming my earlier reporting that he believed Palin was "an idiot. "Sarah Palin had no chance to be President," Ailes said. "The one I didn't hire was Romney. I thought he had a chance [to win] ... I hired people I thought would get ratings."

In response Palin suggests that perhaps the worst punishment imaginable should be visited upon Ailes. Forcing him to watch that horribly mythological monstrosity "The Undefeated!"

Interesting. I haven’t heard all of his remarks, but I wonder if he is aware that the same thing was said about me when I ran for city council, mayor, and eventually governor. No doubt many people who are told they can’t do something will work that much harder, and they succeed. Maybe you guys should send him a copy of Steve Bannon’s “The Undefeated.” The theme of Steve’s film isn’t about me, but about the idea of not letting others dictate one’s path in life and never giving up when you’re fighting for something precious like our exceptional nation and our children’s futures. So, would you send a copy of “The Undefeated” to him?

I seriously dislike Roger Ailes, and I would gleefully devour a bucket of buttered popcorn while watching him get waterboarded for hours upon hours, but even I would never condemn the man to sitting through the vomit inducing cinematic beatification of possibly the most ignorant politician to ever be plucked out of the wilds of Wasilla. THAT would just be cruel.

Besides in this case Ailes is obviously correct. Palin had NO shot at the Presidency, and only the MOST brain damaged paint chip eaters in the country could ever imagine that she would.  Which worked out perfectly for Ailes because brain damaged paint chip eaters make up the vast majority of his audience.