Down the rabbit hole in Wasilla, featuring a "surprise" appearance by the Queen of Black Hearts herself.

To start this post off on a positive note I have to say that my drive to Wasilla yesterday morning was extremely beautiful.  The leaves are just now turning and the sky was a brilliant azure blue. 

If I had been heading to any other place I am sure that my spirits would have been uplifted and there would have been a song in my heart.  As it was the only tune playing in my head was this.

I was a little frustrated because originally my daughter was going to accompany me, and both film the event and serve as my connection to reality as I attempted to stay afloat in a sea of Teabuggery. (Nope, not misspelled THAT is my new term for what I experienced in Wasilla,) However she has been working at the PAC (Performing Arts Center) and they called her in to work early in the morning. I can't really expect her to give up a paying gig just to help her dear old dad retain his sanity in Wasilla, now can I?

I arrived at the Curtis Menard Memorial Sports Center about ten minutes before the "festivities" were to begin.  The place was only about half full when I arrived so I took an aisle seat so that I would be more mobile in case I needed to get up and move around during the so-called "9-11 Remembrance rally."

I looked around at the sea of pure white faces in the crowd, and noticed the rather unusual amount of flag adorned clothing.  There were American flag shirts, American flag jackets, American flag hats, and for those who could not find any American flag emblazoned clothes, there was the option of stabbing American flags directly into hats you already owned.

(Courtesy of Mudflats)

All I can say is thank goodness the event remained tasteful and was never over the top or gaudy in any way.

Teabagger truck parked in front of Sports Center

Okay well maybe a LITTLE gaudy! But come on, it's a truck!  In Wasilla!  What do you expect?

About ten minutes after the event was supposed to begin a little old lady (I believe her name was Amy Thomas) walked up to the podium, and in her best Sunday school teacher's voice, told everybody to sit down.  It was actually more of a command then a request, and people quickly complied. (Teabaggers are always waiting to be told what to do apparently.)

Then they started a slideshow of various patriotic images, with pictures of the still standing Twin Towers interspersed throughout. I saw the Statue of Liberty, numerous American flags, George Washington, military images, and a red, white, and blue apple pie. (Okay I lied about the pie.)

Then the images changed, and we were confronted with images of the towers engulfed in smoke, and images of firefighters, and people rushing away all covered in ash.  All of us have seen these images multiple times, but the people in the crowd were deathly silent as if seeing them for the very first time.  There was no music playing, and aside from a rambunctious baby, the crowd was completely still. 

Suddenly, and with no warning, there erupted the WORST bagpipe music I have ever heard!  I am fairly certain that the gentleman was struggling to play a tune that seemed vaguely familiar, but my ears kept telling my brain to make my legs get them the hell out of there, so I had significant difficulty concentrating enough to identify the "song."  (Update: I just read the program from the event and it identified the song as "Amazing Grace." I guess I will have to take their word for it.) To me it sounded like he had two cats, with ropes tied to their tails, and was repeatedly banging them together. But hey, I'm a Liberal, what do I know?

Finally the images, and the auditory torture came to a stop, and a local minister took to the stage to give the invocation. (By the way the minister, one Stan Roach, ALSO brought that uber patriotic truck displayed out front, so you can just imagine what his prayer was going to sound like.) 

We all lowered our heads and Pastor Stan began to pray.  The prayer was, how can I say this nicely, somewhat unconventional.  Pastor Stan started off venting about the "spineless, gutless, politicians in Washington" (Why does that sound so familiar?), and then went on to say that we needed to "Take back our country" and "Save America", and then I am pretty sure he ended with "amen" or "fuck Obama!" I am a little hazy on that last part..

However I DID learn, from the tenor of that prayer, that in the Valley Jesus is kind of a dick.

Next to speak was the President of Conservative Patriots Group (the chapter of the Klan that organized this event), Jennie Bettine.  She was a slim woman who referred to journalists as the "blame America media" so obviously SHE was very reasonable. (After her speech she received the first standing ovation of the event.  To my ears it sounded like a whole bunch of wet teabags slapping together, but I may have had the tiniest bit of trouble remaining non-judgemental by this point.)

Bettine was followed by Mayor Verne Rupright, who spoke about his memories of 9-11 and a bunch of other stuff that I lost interest in almost immediately. (I did talk to the mayor for a little while after the event, but I completely forgot to ask him if he is ready to meet the challenge to his re-election posed by notorious Palin-impregnator Levi Johnston.  Perhaps next time.)

The MC for this event was Right Wing radio shock jock Glenn Biegel, who seemed to express genuine disappointment that Democratic Senate candidate Scott McAdams did not show up to this event. (Okay let's not play games here,  these Teabaggers would not have endorsed McAdams if he had shown up with his body painted red, white, and blue, and with a patriotic fireworks display shooting out of his ass!)

Next up was CPG's man of the hour, Joe Miller.  He took the stage and gave a fairly reasonable sounding speech.  However if you listened to it carefully there were a few indications of his radical ideas interspersed amongst all of the politically correct platitudes. For instance he claimed that we were attacked on 9-11 NOT because of our support for Israel or our interference in Muslim countries, but simply because "we were American!" He went on to say "The enemy sees us as a free people, and that threatens them." And then later summed it all up by saying he feared that if another attack were to come during this administration that the government would use that incident to "take away more of our freedoms."  (WTF? It seems as if Miller is essentially confusing the things that George W. Bush actually DID with his paranoia about having a black man in the White House today. Talk about projecting!)

This was followed by some "patriotic" songs, the lyrics of which spoke about protecting our freedoms, taking back our country, and a possible 2nd amendment solution to government overreach. (Wait, what?)

The little old Sunday school teacher returned to the microphone and started blathering for a few minutes before it was abruptly snatched from her by CPG President Justine Bettine, who "suddenly" noticed a surprise visitor.

Can YOU guess who it was kids? 

Nope, not Jesus, try again! 

Yes you guessed it! The "totally surprising guest" was none other than Sarah "I live just down the street" Palin!

Palin walked right past my aisle seat as she sauntered up to the stage with nine year old Piper Palin (sporting her Sarah Palin look alike glasses) trailing behind like always. Sucks to be the mascot doesn't it Piper?

Sarah gave the usual patriotic speech pitched to a level that only dogs and porpoises can hear completely. (However if YOU want to try to hear it completely then click here to head on over to Mudflats where they have video of the entire fingernails on a chalkboard speech for your "enjoyment.")

Afterwards Sarah wandered amongst the little people and allowed them to bask in her royal presence for many minutes before heading out of the door with well wishers and representatives from both the domestic and foreign press following in her wake. (Her sudden appearance ABSOLUTELY dominated the event, and nothing that was said by those on stage later, as Palin was greeting well wishers in the crowd, was paid much attention to by anybody. However since I am certain they invited her they have only themselves to blame if she sucked all of the air out of the room when she arrived.)

Now let me take a moment to say a few nice things about how Sarah conducted herself at this event.  She was very approachable, and allowed numerous people to have their picture taken with her.  There was NO security staff, or handlers, with her that I could see, and she seemed quite at ease being there all on her own.  Despite some murmuring on the internet over the last few weeks she did NOT look heavy, in fact she looked a little too thin to my eyes.  She was decked out in nice clothes and appeared relatively attractive, not overly made up or plastic. 

I have no idea if she saw me, even though I was only inches away from her several different times as she worked the crowd.  But in any case she did not react to my presence or ask to have me escorted off of the premises, which was a nice change of pace for me. And other than my criticism of her voice and her regurgitation of the same old talking points I do not have much to criticize Sarah Palin about this go around.

Whew!  Okay I got THAT out of the way. And no that does not mean that I am suddenly a fan, but fair is fair.

But...I DO have a criticism as to how her arrival was treated.  Much was made of the fact that it was a COMPLETE SURPRISE. But as the readers of IM are already aware I knew about it over a week ago, and even posted on Friday that she was going to show up.  After the event I asked one of the organizers, Amy Thomas, about the "surprise" visit and she claimed that she had no idea. Which his very odd because when Sarah first takes the stage she apologizes for being late. How can you be late if NOBODY expects you? Besides if NOBODY knew she was coming then how could somebody have told ME? 

Obviously that is a lie, but I am a little confused as to why Palin felt the need to have people lie about the fact that they knew she was coming. It obviously did not work anyhow since there were press people from Canada, Luxembourg, and France, and I am certainly not convinced they all showed up to see Palin's butt boy Joe Miller. Perhaps Sarah Palin simply cannot do anything unless she gets the opportunity to tell at least ONE juicy lie about it. That might even be something she negotiates ahead of time.

Anyhow after I finished looking at the brochures for various Teabagger friendly websites and on line classes offering to teach me the "Teabagging" truth about our founding fathers, and talked to some of the foreign press, I started my fifty minute drive home to Anchorage.

I rested a bit, took my family out to eat (Thanks for all of your donations by the way.  My daughter was very impressed that our meal was paid for by supporters of IM), and then walked over to the Dena'ina Center to check out the protests.

(Let me just take a moment to clear up a misconception from my last post.  I was NEVER going to actually attend the Sarah Palin/Glenn Beck 9-11 Teabuggery event. I am sorry if I left that impression, but PAYING Glenn Beck to come to my state would have been against EVERYTHING that I believe in. So my intention was always simply to show up to see the protest and talk to a few people, both of which I did.)

When we arrived at the Dena'ina Center it was complete mayhem.  There were protesters all along the side of the Dena'ina building, holding signs and yelling comments to the crowd of people filing in to have their brains filled with that special blend of Sarah Palin and Glenn Beck bullshit. (It is worth noting that the crowd going INTO the building was blindingly white, while the crowd OUTSIDE protesting was a potpourri, of different ethnicities. Interesting no?)

Many of the signs were the same ones that had appeared earlier at the rally at the Park Strip. However there WAS one sign in particular that I know many of you wanted to see, so I took a picture with my I-Phone just for the readers of IM.

The crowd was raucous and clearly VERY unhappy that Glenn Beck was spreading his poison in our state.  Sarah herself did not fair much better with numerous signs referring to her as a "quitter", and some that referred to her as a Nazi and much worse. (Personally I am not a fan of the Nazi imagery and wish it had not been invoked.  But free speech is free speech.)

So that is my report from the yesterday's insanity, I hope that I did not keep you waiting too long.

I will provide some links to reports from other blogs as they become available.

Have a great September 12th!  Namaste my friends.

Update: Mudflats has more on the Glenn Beck/Sarah Palin protesters.

Update 2: More from Wonkette.