Ted Cruz defines the word hypocrisy.

FOX NEWS HOST TO @tedcruz: You cool working with alleged child molester Roy Moore if he's elected?

CRUZ: Sure, no problem, that's up to the voters.

FOX NEWS HOST: And what about alleged groper Al Franken?

CRUZ: Now that's a very serious problem. I'm extremely concerned. pic.twitter.com/1QzMq0Hud5

— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) November 30, 2017

When it comes to the allegations against Roy Moore Cruz is all "let the voters decide," but when it comes to the far less egregious allegations against Democrat Al Franken it is suddenly "These allegations are serious and they keep coming up everyday."

It is like he has absolutely no irony meter.

I swear when I saw this yesterday I swore it had to be fake. But nope, it's not. Update!

.@realDonaldTrump calling Frederica Wilson “whacky” is putting it mildly. The woman is a buffoon. Look at her. https://t.co/GlpIyCTAqY pic.twitter.com/ov3gFCtmjC

— David A. Clarke, Jr. (@SheriffClarke) October 20, 2017

Yeah, just look at her.

Who in their right mind would walk around wearing a ridiculous cowboy hat like that?

P.S. Just in case somebody teaches Clarke what irony is before this posts, here is a screenshot.

Update: And here comes the Twitler-in-Chief to pour more gasoline on this fire.

I hope the Fake News Media keeps talking about Wacky Congresswoman Wilson in that she, as a representative, is killing the Democrat Party!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) October 21, 2017

People get what is going on! https://t.co/Pdg7VqQv6M

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) October 21, 2017

The only thing that is getting killed here is the credibility of this president and his White House.

Satanist wins legal victory against Missouri's draconian anti-abortion laws.

Courtesy of World Religion News:  

An anonymous Missouri woman, identified only as Mary Doe in public court documents, has won a significant legal victory in Western District Court of Appeals in her aim to show that her religious beliefs are being violated by state abortion laws. The court said that her constitutional challenge presented a disputed right which includes reasonable space for disagreement and fair doubt as well. Mary Doe is also an adherent of Satanism. 

Doe, an adherent of The Satanic Temple, argued her religion does not harbor the belief that conception is the beginning of life. The prerequisites, due to this belief, for an abortion procedure in Missouri are directly violating her religious freedom. The latter is protected by First Amendment. Her suit names Josh Hawley, the Missouri Attorney General, and Governor Eric Greitens. Incidentally, Doe's claims were at first thrown out by Cole County Circuit Court. She then appealed the decision. 

The Satanic organization regards Satan as a personal autonomy symbol. It promotes 'rational inquiry' and compassion. The Satanists argue that the abortion restrictions imposed by Missouri, including the state's informed consent law along with the compulsory waiting period of 72 hours violate religious belief of one of the organization's members. The complaint against Missouri was filed by the Satanists in May 2015. 

Oh come on, you have to love this!

Using a religious freedom argument to defeat abortion laws informed by a primitive religious world view is almost too sweet to believe.

And before any of the slack jawed morons come over here and get their panties in a twist over the fact that this woman identifies as a Satanist, remember that the Satanic Temple is really a free thinkers group who shroud themselves in religious trappings in order to defeat these archaic laws drawn up by religious nutjobs.

If only these people could detect irony.

Jared Kushner and others in the White House still often use a private email account to correspond. Update!

Courtesy of Politico:

Presidential son-in-law and senior adviser Jared Kushner has corresponded with other administration officials about White House matters through a private email account set up during the transition last December, part of a larger pattern of Trump administration aides using personal email accounts for government business. 

Kushner uses his private account alongside his official White House email account, sometimes trading emails with senior White House officials, outside advisers and others about media coverage, event planning and other subjects, according to four people familiar with the correspondence. POLITICO has seen and verified about two dozen emails.

“Mr. Kushner uses his White House email address to conduct White House business,” Abbe Lowell, a lawyer for Kushner, said in a statement Sunday. “Fewer than 100 emails from January through August were either sent to or returned by Mr. Kushner to colleagues in the White House from his personal email account. These usually forwarded news articles or political commentary and most often occurred when someone initiated the exchange by sending an email to his personal rather than his White House address.” 

Aides who have exchanged emails with Kushner on his private account since President Donald Trump took office in January include former chief of staff Reince Priebus, former chief strategist Steve Bannon, National Economic Council director Gary Cohn, and spokesman Josh Raffel, according to emails described to or shown to POLITICO. In some cases, those White House officials have emailed Kushner’s account first, said people familiar with the messages. At times, Bannon and Priebus have also used private email accounts to correspond with Kushner and others.

Well now I would suggest that this calls for a taxpayer funded, never ending investigation by Congress.

Oh I'm sorry, that only, and I mean ONLY, happens if your name is Hillary Clinton.

You know I have now reached the point of being unshockable.

I think that there is literally nothing I could learn about Donald Trump and his administration that could surprise me in any way.

Vladimir Putin has a secret room of his own in the White House? Yeah, that seems perfectly believable at this point.

Donald Trump and his family are secretly lizard people from some far away planet? Oh yeah, makes sense.

Trump is actually the result of an experiment using Adolf Hitler's DNA to establish an American Fourth Reich?  Actually that might be the most believable one of all.

Update: Oh hell, Ivanka did it too!

Still not surprised though.

So this happened yesterday. Melania Trump spoke out against bullying at UN luncheon. No, really.

Melania Trump to condemn bullying at U.N. luncheon https://t.co/MUKtvOFqcS via @RebeccaMorin_ pic.twitter.com/dgCCLme08T

— POLITICO (@politico) September 20, 2017

Courtesy of Politico:  

First lady Melania Trump on Wednesday called on the international community to better protect and support children, speaking out against bullying and calling parents and leaders around the world to “come together for the good of our children because through them, our future will be defined.” 

"No child should ever feel hungry, stalked, frightened, terrorized, bullied, isolated or afraid, with nowhere to turn," the first lady said at a luncheon hosted at the U.S. mission to the United Nations. "We need to step up, come together, and ensure that our children's future is bright."

Just my luck to finally get my irony meter out of the shop only to have it see this and explode in my hands again.

Keep in mind that this is only one day after her husband referred to the leader of North Korea as "Rocket Man" and threatened to "totally destroy" the entire country.

Donald Trump's entire presidency is founded on his bullying tactics, and here this Slovenian mail order bride is suggesting that the rest of the world needs to start treating people better. 

Sheesh!

You have to admit, the irony is kind of delicious.

I have a feeling that any communications going back and forth between Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton right now are heavy with LOL's.

NRA employee shoots himself during a firearms training course. So that's an "F" right?

Courtesy of NBC: 

A National Rifle Association employee accidentally shot himself while doing firearms training at the organization's headquarters, according to police. 

The 46-year-old man's pistol accidentally discharged Thursday afternoon as he holstered the gun in Fairfax County, Virginia, police said.

The accidental shooting happened at the NRA's National Firearms Museum at 11250 Waples Mill Road in Fairfax. 

The employee suffered a minor wound to his lower body and was taken to a hospital for treatment, police said.

Of course no charges will be filed because what is he going to do, charge himself with attempted manslaughter?

Remember kids, guns don't shoot people.

NRA employees WITH guns shoot people.

Or in this case, themselves.

Aha!

Now that Obama’s poll numbers are in tailspin – watch for him to launch a strike in Libya or Iran. He is desperate.

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) October 9, 2012

Iran, Libya, Syria, any one of them will do. After all a distraction's a distraction.

I swear folks you simply CANNOT make this stuff up.

Conservative Colorado radio host who claimed that only Democrats commit voter fraud has been charged with...all together now....voter fraud.

Courtesy of WaPo:

The 2016 election was just a month away when Steve Curtis, a conservative radio host and former Colorado Republican Party chairman, devoted an entire episode of his morning talk show to the heated topic of voter fraud. 

“It seems to me,” Curtis said in the 42-minute segment, “that virtually every case of voter fraud I can remember in my lifetime was committed by Democrats.” 

On Tuesday, Colorado prosecutors threw a wrench into that already dubious theory, accusing Curtis of voter fraud for allegedly filling out and mailing in his ex-wife’s 2016 ballot for president, Denver’s Fox affiliate reported. 

Curtis, 57, was charged in Weld County District Court with one count of misdemeanor voter fraud and one count of forgery, a Class 5 felony, according to local media. 

The case is the only voter fraud investigation related to the 2016 election that has resulted in criminal charges in the state, the Colorado secretary of state’s office told Denver’s ABC affiliate.

A good rule of thumb when dealing with outspoken conservatives is that whatever terrible thing they are accusing the liberals of doing they themselves are actually doing instead.

It also works with racists and homophobes.

I think my irony meter just committed suicide.

Trump team now coming out pretty aggressively against this recount effort.

 

"But this is the president-elect’s position right now and I would say he has been incredibly gracious and magnanimous to Secretary Clinton at a time when, for whatever reason, her folks are saying they will join in a recount to try to somehow undo the 70 plus electoral votes that he beat her by. I mean this — you know, I was asked on CNN and elsewhere, goodness a thousand times, will Donald Trump accept the election results? And now you’ve got the Democrats and Jill Stein saying they do not accept the election results? She congratulated him and conceded to him on election night. I was right there. And the idea that we are going to drag this out now where the president-elect has been incredibly magnanimous to the Clintons and to the Obamas is incredible."

 The above was from this morning, but Conway was also talking about it yesterday: 

“What a pack of sore losers,” she said in a statement on Saturday. “After asking Mr. Trump and his team a million times on the trail, ‘Will HE accept the election results?’ it turns out Team Hillary and their new BFF Jill Stein can’t accept reality.” 

“Rather than adhere to the tradition of graciously conceding and wishing the winner well, they’ve opted to waste millions of dollars and dismiss the democratic process. The people have spoken. Time to listen up. #YesYourPresident,” Conway said.

And then both she and Reince Priebus talked on NBC and Fox News about the recount:

Speaking on NBC’s “Meet the Press” on Sunday, Conway said the recount effort was “confounding and disappointing.” And Reince Priebus, the incoming White House chief of staff, said on “Fox News Sunday” that the planned recount would serve “only to divide this country when we need to come together.”

No, actually this recount can serve to bring the country together by proving beyond any doubt that Trump legitimately won this election, (You know aside from all of that Russian hacking, unnecessary GOP investigations, and FBI putting their thumb on the scale of course.)

The only way it would further divide the country would be if.....Oh, so perhaps there is something to find here?

By the way do I even need to remind everybody that Trump once said this: 

"I would like to promise and pledge to all of my voters and supporters and to all of the people of the United States, that I will totally accept the results of this great and historic presidential election - if I win," he said. 

He added he would accept "a clear election result," but reserved the right to contest or file a legal challenge in the case of a questionable result.

And that was BEFORE the election even took place.

Yet now that he has "won," he would fault the Hillary campaign, or anybody else, for wanting to request a recount?

I guess it really doesn't matter that my irony meter has been broken for over a year now, because this would probably just break in anyhow.

Based on what I have learned recently about Bristol Palin this comes off as more than just a little ironic. Update!

A photo posted by Bristol Palin (@bsmp2) on Feb 24, 2016 at 1:14pm PST

Hmm, I wonder if they're still considered rumors if there are images or video to back them up?

Update: It looks like someone forwarded this quote to US Magazine.

Gee I cannot imagine who would do that.

Update 2: Sunny posted this.

 Oh yeah, something happened.

George W. Bush bashes President Obama over his handling of the Middle East. Wait, what?

So as it turns out George W. Bush, you know the guy that started two unnecessary wars that killed hundreds of thousands of people, and almost bankrupted America, attended some closed door meeting with Jewish donors and decided to throw a little shade Obama's way.

Apparently there was a fly in the Jewish lamp oil during this meeting and somebody managed to transcribe large portions and bring them out for all to see.

Here is what was reported:

According to the attendee's transcription, Bush noted that Iran has a new president, Hassan Rouhani. “He's smooth," Bush said. "And you’ve got to ask yourself, is there a new policy or did they just change the spokesman?” 

Bush said that Obama’s plan to lift sanctions on Iran with a promise that they could snap back in place at any time was not plausible. He also said the deal would be bad for American national security in the long term: “You think the Middle East is chaotic now? Imagine what it looks like for our grandchildren. That’s how Americans should view the deal.” 

Bush then went into a detailed criticism of Obama’s policies in fighting the Islamic State and dealing with the chaos in Iraq. On Obama’s decision to withdraw all U.S. troops in Iraq at the end of 2011, he quoted Senator Lindsey Graham calling it a “strategic blunder.” Bush signed an agreement with the Iraqi government to withdraw those troops, but the idea had been to negotiate a new status of forces agreement to keep U.S. forces there past 2011. The Obama administration tried and failed to negotiate such an agreement. 

Bush said he views the rise of the Islamic State as al-Qaeda’s "second act” and that they may have changed the name but that murdering innocents is still the favored tactic. He defended his own administration’s handling of terrorism, noting that the terrorist Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, who confessed to killing Wall Street Journal reporter Daniel Pearl, was captured on his watch: “Just remember the guy who slit Danny Pearl’s throat is in Gitmo, and now they're doing it on TV.” 

Yeah well remember how that guy that supposedly master minded the attacks on 9-11 was shot to shit? Yeah THAT happened on Obama's watch.

Bitch!

Bush went on to add this arrogant statement:

“In order to be an effective president ... when you say something you have to mean it,” he said. “You gotta kill em.”

Yeah well Bush sure was effective at that wasn't he?

Terrorist, terrorist's neighbor, terrorist's innocent family member, Iraqi citizen simply trying to cross the street, Afghan who kinda looks like a terrorist, journalist who was standing to close an Afghan who kinds looks like a terrorist, oh yeah Georgie boy was quite effective at having people killed.

Every fucking problem that President Obama is facing right now in the Middle East is the fault of George W. Bush and his criminal administration. And we all know it.

Even though there are attempts to soften his image such as in Dana Perino's new book, where she relates a story of Bush crying on the face of a badly wounded soldier while awarding him the Purple Heart.

Yeah he could be crying his eyes out for the next fifty years and it would never match the number of tears shed by the families of the people killed and injured in his two wars of choice.

Michele Bachmann and Dick Cheney agree that Barack Obama is the worst President in the history of the United States.

Does anybody else hear that ringing?

Courtesy of Raw Story:  

Former Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-MN) denounced the proposed nuclear deal between the U.S. and Iran in a radio interview on Wednesday, calling it “literally the worst part” of President Barack Obama’s time in office. 

“This puts Iran in a position where they would have the firepower to be able to take out not only Israel, but they would have the firepower to use intercontinental ballistic missiles against the United States with nuclear-tipped warheads,” she told Florida Live host Dan Maduri. “This virtually guarantees, in my opinion, a World War III. I think that alone would qualify Barack Obama for being the worst president that the United States has ever had to endure.”

Now I would usually simply ignore this statement as it comes out of the red lined maw of a complete imbecile who is so ignorant that she loses over works her brains cells simply by trying to remember her own phone number.

However I read that she was not alone in her determination concerning the quality of President Obama's presidency. Dick Cheney was totally vibing on what she was saying.

Courtesy of Politico: 

Former Vice President Dick Cheney says President Barack Obama is the worst commander in chief the United States has ever had, in view of the recent Iranian nuclear agreement. 

Asked about the deal by conservative radio host Hugh Hewitt on Tuesday, the former vice president said the Iranian regime is “one of the most radical” in history and that “Obama’s about to give them nuclear weapons.” 

“I vacillate between the various theories I’ve heard, but you know, if you had somebody as president who wanted to take America down, who wanted to fundamentally weaken our position in the world and reduce our capacity to influence events, turn our back on our allies and encourage our adversaries, it would look exactly like what Barack Obama’s doing,” Cheney said when asked whether he thought the president is naïve or something else. 

“I think his actions are constituted in my mind those of the worst president we’ve ever had,” he said.

You know there are days when I wonder if I could be any more proud of this President. 

I mean if both Michele Bachmann and Dick "Let's bomb the fuck out of Iraq" Cheney think he sucks, then you just know he is doing a FANTASTIC job!

After attacking Obamacare relentlessly, and threatening to repeal it if elected, Ted Cruz is now using it to get insurance for his family. Oops, my irony meter just threw up again.

Look make no mistake, I still hate the Obamacare that my family is now using. Just hate it!

Courtesy of CNN:  

Ted Cruz is going on Obamacare. 

The newly announced Republican presidential candidate told CNN's Dana Bash on Tuesday that he will sign up for health care coverage through the Affordable Care Act -- a law he has been on a crusade to kill. 

"We'll be getting new health insurance and we'll presumably do it through my job with the Senate, and so we'll be on the federal exchange with millions of others on the federal exchange," Cruz said. 

Asked whether he would accept the government contribution available to lawmakers and congressional staffers for their health care coverage through the ACA, Cruz said he will "follow the text of the law."

You know the funny thing is that the only reason that Senators have to use Obamacare is because they complained when it was first being drafted that Congress would be excused from following the mandate. Gee look how that worked out.

By the way this inspired humorist Andy Borowitz to suggest that President Obama would sign an executive order making Cruz ineligible for Obamacare.

However my favorite satirical piece about Cruz (And trust me they are hard to separate from the non-satirical pieces on him. Like this one for instance.), was from the Onion which suggested that Time magazine subscribers were bracing themselves for the inevitable close up or Ted Cruz's face.

Yeah we can laugh now, until somebody actually has to see it.

Lightning strikes worker at Creationist Museum. Is anybody else struck by the shocking irony?

Courtesy of WLWT:  

A staff member was injured Wednesday while clearing guests from a zip line at the Creation Museum. Staffers had cleared the lines before 1:20 p.m. as storms moved into Boone County. 

Museum officials said a male staffer touched an object that had been energized by lightning and was injured. 

He was taken to an area hospital as a precaution, but his injuries were not considered to be serious. 

The zip line attraction opened this spring to help the religion-themed museum attract a wider audience. 

So..many...puns.

I am a non-superstitious thinker so I am unable to equate this with God punishing these people for misinterpreting his book. However I would like to point out that if these idiots did not continue to reject science they would have realized that hanging off of a metal structure in a lightning storm might not be the smartest idea.

And by the way, what kind of "museum" has to install a zip line in order to increase attendance?

One that is losing money hand over fist, that's what kind.

Texas awash in oil, but nary a drop to drink.

Courtesy of Mother Jones:  

Beverly McGuire saw the warning signs before the town well went dry: sand in the toilet bowl, the sputter of air in the tap, a pump working overtime to no effect. But it still did not prepare her for the night in June when she turned on the tap and discovered the tiny town where she had made her home for 35 years was out of water. 

"The day that we ran out of water I turned on my faucet and nothing was there and at that moment I knew the whole of Barnhart was down the tubes," she said, blinking back tears. "I went: 'Dear God, help us.' That was the first thought that came to mind." 

Across the Southwest, residents of small communities like Barnhart are confronting the reality that something as basic as running water, as unthinking as turning on a tap, can no longer be taken for granted. 

Three years of drought, decades of overuse and now the oil industry's outsize demands on water for fracking are running down reservoirs and underground aquifers. And climate change is making things worse. 

In Texas alone, about 30 communities could run out of water by the end of the year, according to the Texas Commission on Environmental Quality. 

Nearly 15 million people are living under some form of water rationing, barred from freely sprinkling their lawns or refilling their swimming pools. In Barnhart's case, the well appears to have run dry because the water was being extracted for shale gas fracking. 

The town—a gas station, a community hall, and a taco truck—sits in the midst of the great Texan oil rush, on the eastern edge of the Permian Basin. 

A few years ago, it seemed like a place on the way out. Now McGuire said she can see nine oil wells from her back porch, and there are dozens of RVs parked outside town, full of oil workers. 

But soon after the first frack trucks pulled up two years ago, the well on McGuire's property ran dry.

I cannot think of a more ironic story than this one. At least not recently.

Texas is the very epitome of trading your soul for profit, and in this case it has taken on a material form as they have traded money making oil for live giving water.

I read years ago that someday wars will not be fought for oil, land, or power. They will be fought over water, and they will make the great wars of the past pale by comparison.

Okay Air Force, you KNOW you have a serious, and possibly epidemic, problem when the guy in charge of investigating sexual assaults is arrested for sexual assault.

Lt. Col. Jeffrey Krusinsk, looking pretty damn rapey in my opinion.

Courtesy of USA Today:  

The Air Force, which has been rocked by a sexual abuse scandal at its major training base, suffered another embarrassment Monday with the revelation that its chief sexual assault prevention officer was arrested over the weekend for allegedly groping a woman. 

Lt. Col. Jeffrey Krusinski, 41, was arrested and charged with sexual battery Sunday after he allegedly grabbed the woman's breasts and buttocks. When he attempted to grope her again, she fought him off and called police, according to the police report. The victim did not know Krusinski, said Dustin Sternbeck, an Arlington County Police spokesman. 

Krusinski is the chief of the Air Force Sexual Assault Prevention and Response branch at the Pentagon. 

Krusinski has been removed from his job while his case is being investigated, said Lt. Col. John Dorrian, an Air Force spokesman. He took the post in February.

Damn! I can only imagine how this guy treated the responsibilities of his job, if he  had so little respect for women that he felt it was okay to put his hands on one that clearly was not welcoming that kind of attention.

It makes me wonder just how many legitimate complaints were passed over due to this man's lack of empathy and understanding.

And don't be fooled into thinking this is not a systemic problem, even the brochure on preventing sexual assault in the Air Force places the sole reswponbility on the victim: 

An Air Force brochure on sexual assault advises potential victims not to fight off their attackers. 

“It may be advisable to submit [rather] than resist,” reads the brochure (.pdf), issued to airmen at Shaw Air Force Base in South Carolina, where nearly 10,000 military and civilian personnel are assigned. “You have to make this decision based on circumstances. Be especially careful if the attacker has a weapon.” 

The brochure, acquired by Danger Room, issues a series of guidances on “risk reduction” for sexual assault. Among others, it advises people under sexual attack in parking lots to “consider rolling underneath a nearby auto and scream loud. It is difficult to force anyone out from under a car.” A public affairs officer at Shaw, Sgt. Alexandria Mosness, says she believes the brochure is current. 

While the brochure also explains that sexual assault is not always committed by people who “don’t look like a rapist” — attackers “tend to have hyper-masculine attitudes,” it advises — it does not offer instruction to servicemembers on not committing sexual assault. Prevention is treated as the responsibility of potential victims. 

Yeah ladies, if you cannot get away, or are in fear of injury, better just lie back and enjoy the assault.

You know that is EXACTLY the kind of advice that rapists really want their victims to receive. 

Just makes their job of raping you that much easier.

Jesus, I swear some of these organizations seem to be run by knuckle dragging Neanderthals who still think of women as toys or possessions and simply have little, if any, respect for them as human beings.

Man shoots himself in the head during first ever NRA sponsored NASCAR race.

Courtesy of Talking Points Memo: 

A medical examiner says a man who died in the infield during a NASCAR’s NRA 500 race at Texas Motor Speedway shot himself in the head. The event was the first NRA-branded race in NASCAR’s premier series. 

The Tarrant County medical examiner’s office on Sunday said the death of 42-year-old Kirk Franklin of Saginaw was a suicide. 

Fort Worth police have said a man who was camping in the infield died of a “self-inflicted injury” after getting into an argument with other campers. The incident happened late in the Sprint Cup race.

The great American lobby, meets the Great American sport, and ends with the great American tragedy.

Not really much more to add is there?