After low turnout at previous venues, and several cancelled book signings, Sarah Palin suddenly has an extremely successful one in California? Really?

So according to the Santa Clarita Valley Signal Palin had a VERY successful book signing:  

More than 1,000 people spent their Saturday afternoon in line for a chance to meet former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin at a book signing at Oaktree Gun Club in Newhall.

Wow! Really, more than a thousand people?

Well according to the Signal, yes. In fact:

In fact, shortly before 1 p.m., all of Palin’s books were sold out even though there were still more than 200 people in line.

Well, that IS impressive. Especially considering the fact that recent signing had suffered from low turnout and she had in fact cancelled at least two of them.

But then the article gets a little confusing for me.

For instance it says this:

The one-time Republican vice presidential nominee talked, mingled and took photos with hundreds of her fans for several hours while she sold and signed copies of her bestselling devotional “Sweet Freedom: A Devotional.”

However  since this book signing did not start until 11:00 AM, and ended before 1:00 PM, how could she have mingled with for "several" hours?

And speaking of mingling, if she really saw somewhere around 800 people in less than 120 minutes that means she would have had less than 20 seconds per "mingle."

I'm not the best with math, but really?

Now local station KHTS provides a more reasonable picture of the event:

Hundreds of Santa Clarita residents lined up outside the gun club Saturday to have the chance to meet the former Governor, get their copy of the book signed and take a picture with Palin. 

The crowd was brought in one at a time through a side room of the main building where they could purchase a book if they did not own one, before meeting Palin.

Now the article does not say how many hundreds, but clearly they did not count numbers in excess of a thousand.

Courtesy of Sarah Palin's Facebook page.

KHTS also gives provides us a little insight into the type of person who would actually line up to get a book signed by Sarah Palin: 

“We’re here to support (Sarah Palin) with her new book she’s coming out with,” Friedman said, “because we support her and her stance with the Second Amendment Foundation. I’m a woman. I’m a lifetime member of the NRA.” 

Clearly an Ammosexual.

“We would love to have her join in this presidential race as well,” Friedman said. “She is a biblical based, faith loving woman. She also has a very strong connection with her family and her community. She also advocates for children and families of children with special needs.”

And a moron.

I think that is fairly descriptive of the type of person Palin attracts.

So the question to be asked here is has Sarah Palin's newest ghostwritten book suddenly had a resurgence of interest? (It's currently back up to 1,353 over on Amazon.) Or is there a little behind the scenes manipulation designed to give that impression?

It looks like Sarah Palin is finally going Hollywood. Well sorta.

Courtesy of LA Weekly:  

Sarah Palin is scheduled to speak to Hollywood conservative group Friends of Abe Friday, a source with knowledge of the situation says. 

The location is Brentwood's Luxe Sunset Boulevard Hotel, the same venue that hosted Donald Trump in July, the source, who did not want to be identified, said. 

The occasion is the FOA's holiday party, the source said, and it'll be the first time a speaker will be featured at the annual event. 

The onetime governor and vice presidential candidate is expected to deliver remarks about the "war on Christmas," the recurring controversy that reemerged this month when Starbucks unveiled red, holiday-neutral cups for the season.

You know I think if Abraham Lincoln were to actually meet these "Friends of Abe" he would probably vomit right into his beard.

Well IF Palin is actually going to this event, then she might also make the last book signing on her schedule at the Oak Tree Gun Club in California.

However considering the fact that her recent appearances have attracted smaller crowds than a garage sale in the Sahara, she just might quit on this as well.

After all, that is what she is most famous for doing.

Sarah Palin cancels book signing in Naperville, Illinois. Gee, I can't imagine why. Update!

Courtesy of the Chicago Tribune:

Former U.S. vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin has scrapped her plans to appear in Naperville next week. 

Anderson's Bookshop in Naperville, which would have been the official bookseller for the event at the Chicago Marriott Naperville Hotel, announced early Wednesday afternoon that Palin, formerly governor of Alaska, called off her Dec. 1 engagement. 

The appearance was to have been in support of Palin's most recently released book, "Sweet Freedom: A Devotional." 

The announcement said the event was called off "due to circumstances out of the control of Anderson's Bookshops," but provided no additional details.

Oh I think we all know the "additional details."

The details are that the crowds are so small they could all arrive on the same city bus, and that the book is falling so hard it threatens to break the sound barrier.

After all nothing screams "failure" like a book signing with nobody there to get a book signed.

I imagine that this will not be the last cancellation, and would not be surprised if she quit the book tour altogether. 

By the way here is the top review for her book over at Amazon:

So the other day I was going to bail my oldest son, Trek, out of the county lockup (Vandalism. Kids, right?). I had my eldest daughter in the car with me and she looks over and yells, "Mama, my water broke!" I started to yell back that I wouldn't have to haul her to the hospital if she'd roped that guy into marrying her before he found out the kid wasn't his like I told her to. But then I took a deep breath and remembered what I'd read in Sarah Palin's book "Sweet Freedom" about being patient on those days when your facade as a Christian family just goes right down the crapper. Sometimes it can be hard to live vibrantly. 

So instead of cussing out my daughter, I drove her to the hospital. There, as I waited for the birth of my second - or is it my third? - illegitimate grandchild, I went on Facebook and shared a few anti-Obama memes before flipping over to Sarah Palin's page to thank her for this book, and for being somebody I could relate to. I even dipped into my Marlboro money to send her a few bucks since I got three emails from her this week begging me to donate so she can save America. 

I hope she continues to write books. They are perfect. Maybe it's because I never got past the seventh grade and read slow. Or maybe it's because she makes me proud to be a bigot. Either way, when I'm reading her books it feels like she understands, and I think it's because she's just like me. Sarah knows thinking is hard, and her books requires no thinking at all. For a conservative reader, that's Sweet Freedom.

And the review has a five star rating too!

Gotta love it.

Update: Well there goes another one.

Anybody want to take bets on how long that will last?

Sarah Palin's book tour is flopping just as we knew that it would.

Covering @SarahPalinUSA book signing in #Orlando #flapol #oponow #sayfie pic.twitter.com/nnMbp8gkUs

— Frank Torres (@franktorresnet) November 20, 2015

Courtesy of the Orlando Political Observer:  

Former Vice-Presidential nominee and Governor of Alaska Sarah Palin was in Orlando on Friday night, the latest stop in her book signing tour to promote her latest work “Sweet Freedom”. 

The stop was not heavily promoted and drew about 100 supporters. Palin did not speak beforehand and did not hold any media availability. She first rose to national popularity as John McCain’s running-mate in 2008, and became a fixture in popular culture. She’s written two previous best sellers and remains a favorite among conservatives nationwide.

Was not heavily promoted?

Seems like they tried:

Special Instructions 

Wristbands (750 limit) will be distributed at 9:00AM on a first come, first served basis on the day of the event and will be required for entry into the signing line. An additional 250 wristbands will be distributed after, for backup if time allows. 

Well it looks like they certainly expected a large turnout.

Gee if only they would have visited IM we could have told them that Sarah Palin's days of fake selling large volumes of books with the help of conservative organization bulk sales are over.

Just like she is.

In the "I told you so" category, guess who gushed over Adele's joke about jump starting her singing career.

Courtesy of People:  

After the singer credited her success in the U.S. to the former Alaska governor during an upcoming BBC One special, Palin returned the favor by sending Adele a signed copy of her new book, Sweet Freedom. 

But it's what's on the inside that counts. On the first page of her book, Palin wrote Adele a gushing thank-you note that's packed with song title puns. It reads: 

 "Adele, You look so great! So beautiful! So … Rumor Has It you recently threw me some credit for your amazing success – very kind coming from Someone Like You! Congrats on motherhood. Keep Setting Fire to the Rain. 

Love, your fan … Sarah Palin" 

And by way of thanking the mega star she sends her one of her crappy books?

That will teach Adele to mention her name, even jokingly, during an interview.

Sarah Palin's book promotion goes from the sublime to the ridiculous.

Courtesy Anarchy Oakley's Facebook page:

JESUS WOULD FIGHT FOR OUR SECOND AMENDMENT 

Taking concrete defense measures (ie. arming ourselves) away from the good guys? Yeah... that... we don't want that.

Jesus would fight for our second amendment?

Has she even read the book she is plagiarizing?

Is this the man who would fight for the 2nd Amendment?

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’[a] 39 But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. Matthew 5:38.

Or this man?

“You have heard that it was said, ‘you shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ “But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you." Matthew 5:43-44.

Because that's the man who the religion that Palin claims to adhere to is named after.

I find it beyond ironic that I would feel the need to defend Christianity, but let's face it this woman, and MANY of the loudest voices seeking to represent her religion, seem to HAVE no idea about it's central theme.

But here's a hint.

I does NOT involve shooting first and asking questions later.

You know as an Atheist I would love to give all of the credit for people leaving the church on the fact that we have access to more information and are better educated today than in years past.

However the truth is that it is exactly people like Sarah Palin, Mike Huckabee, and Ted Cruz who wrap themselves in the cloak of Christianity, while preaching messages of hate and divisiveness, that is causing people to run screaming from the religion in droves.

So I guess for that I should tha.....I should than....I should offer Palin my tha.....you know what I'm trying to say.

After all she is unwittingly doing a public service, while trying with all her might to do something completely different.

Much like she tried to help reform the Republican party and instead damn near destroyed it.

P.S. Oh yeah I almost forgot, Palin also linked to this parody song attacking the President over his calls for gun control. I assume that Billy Joel will be contacting his lawyers later today. 

Sarah Palin invites former adversary Louis CK to Alaska, and a mega-star credits Palin with her success.

Maybe a bit of the, um, "uniqueness" of #SweetFreedom - now the #1 Christian book and #1 devotional in the country -...
Posted by Sarah Palin on Wednesday, November 18, 2015

Sure meet the Donald, do morning and late night television, and get your name linked to one of the biggest comedy names in the business. Just part of the grifting grand tour of greed.

I don't know Mr. CK, but if he wants to come up for a fishing trip, where he won't end up bludgeoned on the bottom of the boat along with the fish, he should drop me a line.

In other news which is sure to get Palin some undeserved attention, it turns out that the singer Adele is giving her some hopefully tongue in cheek credit for her success.

Courtesy of the Hamilton Spectator:  

The 'Hello' singer doesn't think she'd have done as well Stateside if the controversial politician hadn't rearranged an appearance on iconic US TV show 'Saturday Night Live' to co-inside with her own performance on the programme. 

She said: "[I had] huge luck, I got 'SNL' - I've done it once and I think I'm doing it again - and the week I was doing it was supposed to be a normal week and the week after Sarah Palin was due to be on but something came up on the campaign so she did the week I was doing it with Josh Brolin. 

"It was one of the most watched 'SNL's ever and it was two weeks before the Grammy ballot, where people decide what they want to nominate, the stars aligned for me. 

"The album shot to number one on iTunes, then I was nominated for a Grammy, it was a joke. All thanks to Sarah Palin."

Well I agree that Sarah Palin's a joke, but not one funny enough to have launched the career of such a gifted singer.

I personally am a big fan of Adele's and I am certain that a talent like hers did not require any help from the likes of Sarah Palin.

I am also aware that Palin will use the crap out of this to help promote herself, and this pathetic book of hers.

Sarah Palin continues her barely noticed media tour to pimp her ghostwritten book.

Wild Child, Granny Grifter, and Molly.

 Courtesy of Palin's Facebook page:  

Chatting w/A.J Calloway about ‪#‎SweetFreedom‬ - it's EXTRA's most unique studio that's actually inside a store in the heart of Times Square; my "entourage" 😉 (Willow & fantastic sister Molly!) got to escape "assistants'"chores & had more fun shopping there while I worked... the interview runs tonight on EXTRA & I thank them for their interest in Sweet Freedom!

Besides EXTRA Palin also did Sean Hannity's show yesterday which signals the second time in one day that she had to crawl back to Fox after they fired her ass.

Next week Palin is scheduled to appear on Late Night with Seth Meyers which reminds me why I never watch that show anymore.

A quick Google search shows that Palin is really not making much of a ripple, and while her book sales have improved with this media tour the pool of potential buyers is tiny and I doubt that it will maintain its rankings for long.

Even her lame attempts to tease a potential future in politics are falling on mostly deaf ears. After all we have heard that song and dance too many times in the past. 

Essentially the woman is finished. And even though there may be some morbid curiosity concerning what happened to the once famous conservative rabble rouser, there does not seem to be much excitement that she is back in the public eye.

Hillary Clinton to sit down for interview with Fox News in June. Gee (Benghazi!), I wonder what (Benghazi!) they will ask her? (Benghazi!)

Going to sit down for Fox News interview. Might want to start praying for them now.

Courtesy of The Washington Post: 

Fox News Channel will do an interview with former secretary of state Hillary Rodham Clinton next month on the heels of her memoir release date. 

Fox News's Bret Baier and Greta Van Susteren will conduct a joint interview with Clinton on June 17, the network announced Thursday. It will come one week after the June 10 release of Clinton's memoir, "Hard Choices."

I don't usually watch Fox News, but I will be sure to catch this as it will be a chance to watch Hillary respond to some of the Fox News conspiracy theories in person.

I have no doubt she will chew both of these lightweights up and spit them out.

Greta is probably going to be too star struck, and too busy girl crushing, to ask anything of substance, but Baier has a history of being a disrespectful douchenozzle. 

A final look back on the Palin style Christmas. Kinda reminds me of a funeral.

I remember when MY mother wore her hooker boots for Christmas. Wait no I don't, my mother is a lady.

By the way did you know that a lot of people mistakenly think that December 25th is the date that Jesus was born? Well they do, see!

Here's Tripp back from Arizona for a short time so that he can be featured in the Alaska family pictures. (Gotta maintain the facade don't you know.)

Of course one of the great things that most of us got for Christmas this year is the end of Palin's book tour. After all nobody buys a Christmas book after Christmas. (However if you are interested there is one more really great review you might enjoy.)

Of course sadly that does NOT mean that Palin will fade from the national spotlight as muhc as we might have all hoped that she would.

Next April will be the debut of her new show "Sarah Palin poses in camouflage clothing and pretends she knows the first thing about hunting."

Then of course there will be the 2014 primaries, where we can measure the desperation level of the conservatives by watching to see if they crawl to Sarah Palin for an endorsement, and then measure the intelligence of the candidates in the general by how much distance they put between her and them as they campaign against their Democratic rivals.

And sadly for the country her voice will be heard. Fox will interview her occasionally, just to break up the monotony of interviewing with people who know what they are talking about or who can string a sentence together that makes sense. 

She will undoubtedly have an article of two ghostwritten for her over at Breitbart,

And of course there will be her often bizarre and self serving tweets and Facebook posts.

However I really believe that if the progressives do well this next elections cycle, and really run the board on the Republicans, we could SIGNIFICANTLY reduce the number of times we have to hear from, or about, Sarah Palin in 2015.

In fact I think THAT could be a campaign slogan for the Democrats.

"VOTE FOR US, AND FINALLY SHUT THAT ALASKAN BITCH UP FOR GOOD!"

That would certainly get MY vote.

(Pictures courtesy of Chuck jr's Facebook page.)

Political cartoonist, David Horsey, illustrates the problems with Palin's newest book quite eloquently.

Here is what Horsey had to say in his Los Angeles Times commentary:  

I'm a big fan of Christmas, but I'm not inclined to join Sarah Palin's pro-Christmas crusade. Her new book, "Good Tidings, Great Joy: Protecting the Heart of Christmas," lays out the case that Christmas is under attack by stringing together a litany of slights against the holiday -- real, imagined and exaggerated -- that do not add up to much more than her usual chip-on-the-shoulder complaint against anyone outside her narrow definition of "real Americans." 

A column by Michelle Cottle of the Daily Beast includes a pretty good summation of Palin's book: "From the first chapter, it is clear that, whatever her concerns about 'a Christ-less Christmas,' Palin has found a convenient frame on which to hang her rage at pretty much everything: Obamacare, Obamaphones, Nancy Pelosi, the national debt, gay marriage, sexual sin, crony capitalism, the preferential treatment of Muslims (whoo-wee! does she get rolling on that one), the lamestream media, Chick-fil-A haters, abortion, Mitt Romney’s hair, and on and on. No liberal stereotype, from Birkenstocks to the French, vegans, and NPR, is too tired to sneer at." 

The book is also peppered with complaints about her treatment at the hands of pretty much everyone during her run for vice president in 2008. It's amazing how put-upon Palin still feels, given that she has turned her very thin political resume and limited intellectual gifts into a lucrative celebrity enterprise that has included a cable reality show, TV commentator gigs and bestselling books (although her Christmas book may not be setting the publishing world on fire). She should be immensely pleased with how far she has gone from her days as a lowly city council member in a remote burg in the Alaskan outback. 

Very well put!

As many of us here at IM have pointed out in the past, essentially Palin is on a never ending "woe is me" tour, and whether she is giving a Fox News interview, having a Facebook post written for her, or contributing lunatic ideas to a ghostwritten book about Christmas, the central theme never changes.

Which is by the way, "I almost had it all, and then those liberal media assholes took it away from me. Fuck Obama!"

Palin continues to sell her Christmas time snake oil on the tent revival circuit. This time over at Pat Robertson's Alzheimer riddled network CBN.

Click the "she's a man baby" photo to play video.

Courtesy of CBN: 

Palin told CBN News the book is a rallying cry for Christians to stand up against those who want keep faith out of the public square. "We were founded as written in our charters of liberty, in the documents that created America," Palin said.  (No, actually no we were not.)

"We're founded on a Judeo-Christian faith that would allow forever the right to express or respect for faith in America."Palin warned those rights are under attack from atheists. She has a name for them in the book: "Joe McScrooge." (Really has fetish for the name "Joe" doesn't she?)

"Joe McScrooge armed with an attorney is quite dangerous," Palin proclaimed. 

"Joe McScrooge?" Did she get the Dickens and Disney characters mixed up?

Palin said the situation has her concerned. 

"The road that we are on today is too many of those angry atheists armed with attorneys would try to take away that freedom to express faith. It's going to end in ruin unless we do something about it," she warned. (Nobody wants to take away anybody's right to express their faith. We just want the right to not have to see it displayed in government facilities and on public property, so that our rights to worship, or believe, or not believe are preserved. Just like the Founding Fathers wanted.)

That's where the fight comes in. Palin, who knows a thing or two about adversity, (Well she should, she has been fighting against the truth getting out for quite a few years now.) is urging Christians not to be intimidated. 

"I want this book to be a call to action, to take steps for school districts, for communities, for business owners, for families to understand they don't have to hide their faith. They don't have to be embarrassed by it," she said. (Since when are Christians embarrassed about their faith?)

Palin added this isn't just about fighting lawsuits. 

"This war on Christmas is really the tip of the spear when it comes to a greater battle that's brewing," Palin told CBN News. "And that battle that's brewing is those who would want to take God out of our society, out of our culture, which will lead to ruin as history has proven." (Please don't try to teach us about history. That is like a legless guy giving dance lessons.)

Palin also sees big government as part of the problem and makes it clear that that includes the Obama administration. (Actually in Palin's reality there WAS no big governemtn problem before Obama. And remember, she wants to teach us about history.)

"To tell you the truth, I don't know what they're doing right," Palin told CBN News. (Ended two wars, saved the economy, got millions of Americans health care, killed Bin Laden, yep there are certainly NO examples of the administration doing anything right.)

In her book, she says without a faith in Christ, she wouldn't have been able to stand through those tough times when she ran for vice president. (I think she is confusing "faith in Christ" with "several lines of blow.")

"There is no way I would be standing if it weren't for that faith that I adopted as a kid, asking Christ into my life, putting my life in His hands, saying, 'God you're my Creator. I've got to believe that You know more about destiny than I do, so, heaven forbid I try to orchestrate it myself,'" she said. "'Lord, send me. I'll go.'" 

If that last part were true she would have dropped off the face of the planet already.  I mean how much more can a deity do after orchestrating a failed campaign, a failed reality show, a failed marriage, getting her kicked off of Fox News so she had to crawl back on her hands and knees for recurring guest spot at a fraction of her original pay, maker her hair fall out, make everybody in her home state despise her, and now slowly drain the nutrients out of her body until she looks like a bewigged version of the Crypt Keeper, before she gets the damn hint?

I don't know if any of your noticed but Palin seems to have orchestrated enough bulk sales of her book to bring back up the Amazon Best Seller's list. I mean it is still nothing to write home, or another book, about, but it is still definitely the result of somebody doing a little wheeling and dealing.

Hmm, now where would she have had to read to realize that she was being mocked for having her book so low on the the Amazon page?

Sarah Palin demonstrating her ignorance about Thomas Jefferson in her own words.

The above is from Palin's visit to Liberty University last Thursday. Where Palin did her best to lower the IQ of the already logic averse student body that attends the "school."

Here is how the Washington Monthly covered this portion of her speech: 

Palin said Jefferson would likely agree that secularists had set their sights on destroying the religious themes in Christmas celebrations. 

“He would recognize those who would want to try to ignore that Jesus is the reason for the season, those who would want to try to abort Christ from Christmas,” she said. “He would recognize that, for the most part, these are angry atheists armed with an attorney. They are not the majority of Americans.” 

Palin said there was a double standard that protected atheists at the expense of the religious. 

“Why is it they get to claim some offense taken when they see a plastic Jewish family on somebody’s lawn - a nativity scene, that’s basically what it is right?” she said. “Oh, they take such offense, though. They say that it physically even can hurt them and mentally it distresses them so they sue, right?” 

“But heaven forbid we claim any type of offense when we say, ‘Wait, you’re stripping Jesus from the reason, as the reason for the season,’ but heaven forbid we claim any type of offense,” Palin said. “So that double standard, I think Thomas Jefferson would certainly recognize it and stand up and he wouldn’t let anybody tell him to sit down and shut up.”

The Washington Monthly then went on to provide a couple of Jefferson quotes that indicate Palin's complete lack of knowledge or understanding of the Founding Father.  

“Believing with you that religion is a matter which lies solely between man and his God, that he owes account to none other for his faith or his worship, that the legislative powers of government reach actions only, and not opinions, I contemplate with sovereign reverence that act of the whole American people which declared that their legislature should ‘make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof,’ thus building a wall of separation between church and State.” -Thomas Jefferson, letter to Danbury Baptist Association, CT., Jan. 1, 1802 

“Christianity neither is, nor ever was a part of the common law.” -Thomas Jefferson, letter to Dr. Thomas Cooper, February 10, 1814

What's more, Jefferson was famously so unimpressed with  the New Testament that he took a razor and cut out all of the miracles attributed to Jesus, and the parts that he considered pure BS, and put together the Jefferson Bible dedicated to the philosophy of Jesus.

No birth in a manger, no wise men, no walking on water, no healing the sick, no bringing the dead back to life, and no resurrection after the crucifixion.

So exactly HOW does Palin imagine that Jefferson would get his panties in a wad over people celebrating a holiday that does not fall anywhere near the birthday of Jesus, without saying the words "Merry Christmas?"

P.S. This is how the Washington Monthly began their arcticle:

If you could turn stupid into a fuel, you could use Sarah Palin to leave the Solar System.

That about sums it up, don't you think?

Final image of the day.

This showed up on Palin's Facebook page about an hour and half ago with this caption:

My fun date with Tripp today at the bookstore - spotted his twin on "The Christmas Story" movie display!

Yes Tripp is a cute little guy. However what I get from this is that he is still out of the state, away from his dad, and being used by his grandmother to promote her crappy book.

Poor little prop.

Sarah Palin finally gets a positive review of her new ghostwritten book. Now who do you think would do that?

So after many scathing, and sometimes simply confused, review of her book Palin finally found a media outlet with so little journalistic credibility that they are willing to fawn over the book.

Courtesy of (Where else?) Breitbart:  

“If I’m for Christmas, it’s only because I’m for Christ,” writes Gov. Palin. “There is no ultimate peace apart from Christ, and it is Christ who empowers every act of ‘goodwill toward men’ in our otherwise fallen hearts.” 

The book’s blending of personal experience with discussions of political efforts to morph Christmas into a homogenized celebration of the “holidays” makes for a brisk and enjoyable read. Even as we learn that Todd Palin gives the Governor what she considers the coolest of Christmas gifts—such as a .30-06 rifle, hockey skates, and a “beautiful red manual ice auger for ice fishing”—Palin packs powerful punches. 

“There are few things that anger a secular liberal atheist more than a horizontal plank intersecting a vertical plank—a cross—on public land,” writes Palin. “Perhaps Christmas causes so much anger because the very name of the holiday broadcasts the Name above all Names.”

I have no idea why Palin believes that Christmas makes secular people angry, when it was the Christians who have historically been the most irritated by the holiday.

And does anybody, and I mean ANYBODY, believe that Palin only celebrates Christmas becasue it features the name of her heavenly heartthrob? Could you even imagine Palin turning down free stuff, simply because the holiday does not mention Jesus?

The much more accurate face of Jesus of Nazareth.

While we are on the topic of book tours, did anybody else read a certain blind item over at Crazy Days and Nights?

This former A list politician/reality star could barely sit still at a recent book signing. So much twitching and that runny nose was out of control. What the world would love is a photo of her using coke. I dare say it would be worth millions.

Oh come on this could be anybody!

I mean surely there is another former A list politician/reality star who is currently on a book tour, right?

Umm, right?

And it is not like Sarah Palin has demonstrated any erratic thinking or weight loss, or  has a documented history of coca.....ohhh.

Gee I can hardly wait for that fitness book of hers to come out, "Snorting your way to skinny, by Sarah Palin."

Sarah Palin finds the courage to appear on the O'Reilly Factor? Must be a Christmas miracle. Update!

Click poorly fitted Christmas wig to start video

Here is the transcript which I checked against the one at Fox for accuracy: 

O'REILLY: Continuing now with Governor Sarah Palin her new book "Good Tidings and Great Joy" pretty much takes up my theme that Christmas has to be defended these days in America. So when did you first notice a change? 

PALIN: Oh well you know, I noticed a change back when I was the mayor of our city. And I sanctioned and promoted and participated in our Nativity scene that I would allow -- 

O'REILLY: That was Wasilla. What year was that? 

PALIN: Yes that was in the early 2,000s was when I started hearing from people saying you're not going to be able to keep this up, Madam Mayor. Somebody is going to sue you for allowing God to be recognized in the public square. (Yeah I am pretty sure this never happened. Especially not in Wasilla which is full of Fundamentalist Bible thumpers. Just a story to give her self credibility with O'Reilly.)

O'REILLY: Ok so early 2,000? 

PALIN: Yes. 

O'REILLY: It started to come in. 

PALIN: In my life, yes. 

O'REILLY: Right. And no that's me too. Me too. 

PALIN: Ok yes. 

O'REILLY: Pretty much 10 years ago. And then it reached its apex when some major corporations ordered their employees not to say "Merry Christmas", do you remember that? (And that Timmy is how the Fox News fake war on Christmas began.)

PALIN: Yes. (Of course she remembers that. Where do you think she got the idea to have this book written for her Bill?)

O'REILLY: And I think you have some examples in your book about that. 

PALIN: I do. Yes. 

O'REILLY: And then we said to people hey you know maybe you don't want to shop at these places. And then all of a sudden magically, like Santa, they changed. 

PALIN: Well, what I recognized in the book too, though, are those businesses that are bold enough to not allow that double standard to be applied. And their employees can say what they want to say. And they can freely express their acknowledgment of Jesus being the reason for the season at Christmas time. And I give shout outs and kudos to those businesses because customers will stick with them then. (Sure but let one business owner celebrate Saturnalia, the foundation for Christmas, by selecting one customer as "Lord of Misrule," to embody the evil in the world, and then slaughter them as a sacrifice, and watch the Christians freak out about that! Hypocrites!)

O'REILLY: And most of them are doing that. 

PALIN: Yes, they are. 

O'REILLY: You don't have any beef about happy holidays. Do you? 

PALIN: Absolutely not nor Santa Claus, or anything else. No it's all wonderful. 

O'REILLY: You know this woman -- this woman in the "New York Times" today I forget her name. But she writes a column there. (Gail Collins. Good article too.) She is you know she's mocking you and mocking me saying oh they don't like happy holiday. I don't care about happy holidays. Somebody say happy holidays to me I said ok give me a present that's my thoughtI don't care if they're holidays you know let's -- where is my present. But when you start to say you can't say merry Christmas. 

PALIN: Right, right. 

O'REILLY: And you can't have the karesh. (I have no idea what this is supposed to mean. Update: Okay some of you have suggested that O'Reilly might have said "creche" which is a French word representing the nativity.)

PALIN: Right. (But of course dipshit says "right" anyhow.)


O'REILLY: And you can't have Christmas carols by choirs, school choirs, it's part of our culture. 

PALIN: Well and that's the double standard that's applied. And that's what I'm not going to sit down and accept and I don't think the majority of Americans will. Because that is -- that war on Christmas is the tip of the spear that really translates into a war on religious freedom and that's a much bigger problem that we will be facing if we just were to sit back and allow the angry atheists who are armed with an attorney to tell us that we cannot say things like "Merry Christmas".  (There's that slam against atheists again.)

Sarah Palin at Liberty University. Update: Palin responds to Bashir resignation.

Look! It's the ghost of false pregnancies past!

Courtesy of Liberty University:

In a sit-down, conversational interview on stage with President Jerry Falwell, Jr. and Vice President for Communications Johnnie Moore, Palin talked about her motivation to keep standing for “time-tested truths” — the same truths Liberty upholds — when she is attacked by the mainstream media for her conservative views. (Really? Liberty University stands up for the fake pregnancy stories and misrepresentation of our country's values that Sarah Palin stands up for?)

“This is what inspires me — you,” she told the arena of more than 10,000 students. “ … What inspires me and allows me to keep going and standing strong is being in a place like this.” 

Courtesy of Facebook

“You guys are doing an awesome job; it’s amazing, the infrastructure, additions to the amenities, what a wonderful force for good in this part of the nation and for the world,” Palin said. 

Coming off a 15-city tour for her new best-seller, “Good Tidings and Great Joy: Protecting the Heart of Christmas,” (Is it really still a "best seller" when it is at number 664 on the Amazon best seller list?)  she talked about the larger message that the Christmas story brings today. 

“My book is about protecting the heart of Christmas, which is really about protecting the heart of America,” (That's right kids the pagan holiday Saturnalia, today mostly represented by the Turkish St. Nicholas, and celebrated by plunging ourselves into debt in order to buy the newest, most expensive factory assembled  soon to be obsolete electronics, equals America.) she said. “Because the message of Christmas is the message of hope and change, not the stuff you hear coming out of Washington. (Wait, what?) … It’s the Judeo-Christian faith that provided all the foundation in our charters of liberty, our Constitution, our Declaration of Independence. It was a faith–filled people who understood how blessed our land was and the opportunities we have, our wonderful work ethic, all the things that have made America so exceptional.” (Such as killing off its original aboriginal inhabitants, raping the land for its precious minerals and resources, and polluting its air so that our children are born with allergies and birth defects.)

She said the tour is about more than a book; it is about restoring our nation’s principles. (Of greed and commercialism.)

“That’s why I appreciate Liberty University,” she said. “You will be a force for good, understanding the importance of Christian faith and a Christian education. You are the future leaders of this country.” (Let us all hope that's not true.)

Students submitted their own questions for Palin, which ranged from who her biggest inspiration is (her youngest son, Trig, who has Down syndrome and has taught her “the world’s standards of perfection are not God’s standards of perfection”) to her family’s favorite Christmas memories (eating moose chili and traveling “over the river and through the woods” by snow machines). ("Over the river and through the woods?" Hmm I wonder if they are off to "Grandfather's house?" And I certainly hope that the snowmachine knows the way through the "white and drifted snow." I swear there is not one original thought in this imbecile's head.)

She left students with a lesson she’s learned as a leader: 

“Fear not. Again, it’s that message of Christmas; remember the angel came to Mary in a situation with less than ideal circumstances (Yeah she was knocked up and needed to explain it to her husband.) … and that message needs to be received by each one of you here today as you get out there in a pretty rough and tumble world. You’re going to be inundated in the workplace with cultural and societal pressures trying to beat you down (That's Palin speak for "educate you.")… remember that message from that angel. … The greater message was that everybody is made so uniquely, with certain gifts and talents and passions and interests for a reason, to get out there and do good for the world. … When it comes to families, when it comes to jobs, please remember that you do have purpose and you do have destiny — God don’t make no junk. ... Success is letting Him shine through you so that others will be attracted to that light — the eternal destiny is really what matters.” 

Looking back at where God has taken her, Palin still calls her rise to a position of leadership “bizarre,” (Well there's something we can agree on.) but credits it as God’s work. (And here he thought the platypus was the worst of his screw ups.)

“Put your life in God’s hands — you never know where you’re going to end up.”

Yeah you could end up promoting a poorly conceived ghostwritten book on a book tour that is  falling apart faster than that space station in the movie "Gravity."

If there were actually 10,000 students there you KNOW they were compelled to attend. No way do 10,000 young people, even Liberty University brain washed young people, voluntarily turn out to have their IQ's lowered by this simpleton.

I wonder where she will go next? Perhaps there is a local prison who could lock there inmates into a room to hear her demonstrate her lack of knowledge about America and Christmas?

Or better yet an institute for the insane. THAT would make her feel right at home.

Update: Here is the video of Palin discussing Bashir from Fox and Friends. 

And here is a synopsis provided by Mediaite: 

“In this world, you are going to be hurt and attacks will come your way,” Palin said. “I just hope attacks like that doesn’t make people hesitate.” 

“One of the things about his attack is it was scripted,” Steve Doocy observed. “The people at NBC had a chance to review it and said – they obviously, or apparently, all agreed.” 

“It was refreshing to see, though, that many in the media did come out and say, ‘Look, our standards have to be higher than this,” Palin observed. 

Brian Kilmeade asked if the Sarah Palin of 2008 would have reacted then to this manner of attack as she did. “At this point I’m used to it,” Palin replied. “That’s kind of a sad state of affairs to have to admit that, at this point, I am used to it.” 

“Six years ago, I probably would have been personally hurt by such an attack,” she revealed. 

Asked if anyone representative from a women’s advocacy group had reached out to her, Palin noted that she never “heard from one feminist.” 

“I’m sure they’re getting to it,” Elisabeth Hasselbeck suggested sarcastically. 

Palin concluded by disclosing that she feels “callused” and is no longer surprised by these types of attacks on her character.

Okay I just threw up n my mouth a little.

ANYBODY who believes that Palin is the victim of ANYTHING is a moron. The woman has been playing this victim card since she was a child, and the fact that there are still so many who cannot see through it pisses me off.

Sarah Palin's next two stops on her Grift-a-palooza will be at a university founded by a dead televangelist and to visit the library of one just barely clinging to life.

Photo of the Heath family's holiday mountain of death mentioned in Sarah Palin's book.

Courtesy of Aimee Simple McFuckup's Facebook page: 

Honored to be participating in the final Convocation of 2013 this Wednesday at Liberty University. Look forward to discussing “Good Tidings and Great Joy” and how together we can protect the heart of Christmas. 

Liberty University, for those who do not know, was founded by gay basher extraordinaire Jerry Falwell, who built the school in response to new civil rights laws that were forcing regular universities to  allow black folk to sleep in the same dorms as their white betters.

This will take place tomorrow, on Wednesday, after that Palin is off to one of the few libraries on the planet that would allow her sad little book to be placed on its shelves.

We will be in Charlotte, NC, this Friday, December 6th at the Billy Graham Library signing copies of "Good Tidings and Great Joy." Look forward to visiting with volunteers as well as supporting Operation Christmas Child. Todd, Bristol, and I visited Haiti with Franklin Graham and were able to hand out some of the generous shoeboxes these volunteers process and package with care -- glad to have the opportunity to thank them and highlight the great work they do.

So Palin is now essentially working the tent revival circuit, trying to find folks who are not known for exercising their critical thinking skills, in the hopes that she will be able to unload a few more of these future toilet paper dispensers.

After all who better to buy a book full of fabrications and poorly written family mythology, than people raised to accept that the Bible was a historically accurate document written by the hand of God?

Of course that is assuming that these Bible thumpers were not paying attention when this happened.

Sarah Palin's "War on Christmas" book currently resides in 666th place on the Amazon bestseller list [pic]: pic.twitter.com/tSK2xPp2ki
— Path2Enlightenment (@Path2Enlighten) December 3, 2013

But hey, if you think about it, "Santa" is just "Satan" with the letters rearranged. After all who ELSE knows whether you're naughty or nice?

Video of Sarah Palin leaving the Today Show on October 11, at the very beginning of her disastrous book tour.

Boy that Willow's a friendly gal isn't she?

I love how in the spirit of Christmas Palin steals that old man's pen, uses it to sign two other people's books but not his, and then forces him to wrench in out of her hand to get it back.

I also noticed that in this video Palin manages to ignore the Levi Johnston questions, the same questions to which later in the day she could no longer resist responding.

By the way as of this posting Palin's faux Christmas book is back up to 278 in the Amazon bestsellers rank, which must mean that some conservative group made a bulk purchase in order to help her save face.  Calling in those favors Sarah?

Sarah Palin NEEDS you to believe that she still lives in Alaska. I mean seriously people!

Todd and Trig, well at least we know THEY live in Alaska.

Courtesy of Arizona's own political pole dancer's Facebook page:

Friends, 

Thanksgiving offers us invaluable time to spend with our family (So your finally going to spend time with them? Does Trig even know who you are anymore?) and reflect on our many blessings. In 1789, George Washington declared a day of national Thanksgiving for our new country to render unto God our "sincere and humble thanks for His kind care and protection." 

But even before that first proclamation from a new nation, pioneers across America celebrated Thanksgiving as a time to give praise to God for full harvests and Divine Providence. (Holy crap, not only does she want to make sure that only Christians celebrate Christmas, now she wants to take Thanksgiving away from us as well!)

And indeed, America has been richly blessed. From coast to coast, we enjoy an abundance of natural resources, plentiful harvests, beautiful cities and our most precious gift of all—a people who value liberty and continue to stand as an example to the world of all that can be accomplished by a free and hard-working people. (So it's NOT about turkey, stuffing, and football?)

This Thanksgiving, join me in a moment of prayer to give thanks for the thousands of American men and women in our armed forces who will spend Thanksgiving away from their homes and families, facing danger overseas to protect our way of life. 

When we sit down to enjoy a family meal on Thursday, I will give thanks to God for the blessing of a strong and diverse family life that has taught me so much about loyalty, selflessness, and compassion. I will pray for God's continued blessings on my family, and on yours, and on this great nation of ours. (Yep gotta pimp that Christian cred, after all she has a book to sell.)

From my family to yours, God bless you and Happy Thanksgiving! 

With an Alaskan heart, Sarah Palin

 Look she signed it with "an Alaskan heart" so doesn't THAT prove she is still an Alaskan resident?

I mean what more does she have to do, move to Alaska?

Palin also posted this video on her ghostwritten post, which I THINK was supposed to demonstrate how much people sill love her, but which to me simply showed a woman who appears sickly, undernourished, and desperate for attention.

P.S. By the way if you want to read a rather different, more accurate,  take on the Thanksgiving story, from a couple of teachers, just click here.

Sarah Palin back in Alaska? Does this lady think we're idiots?

Courtesy of the Arizona resident's Facebook page:  

Back home in Alaska after a great few weeks on our “Good Tidings and Great Joy” book tour! Had to jump on Todd's SkiDoo with Trig to eliminate jet lag. Thanks so much to all who came out to visit, share recipes, and give us the chance to say an early Merry Christmas!

Back home?  Does this picture look like Arizona to anybody else?

Look I believe that coincidences DO happen, unlike a certain poorly bewigged lunatic I could mention, but come on!

I put up this post proving that Sarah Palin has not received a PFD two years running yesterday morning, and then eight and a half hours later Palin is saying that she is suddenly back in Alaska?

And with pictures to "prove it." Pictures which just so happen to feature the little boy that we accused her of abandoning as well. Seriously?

You know if I were a conspiracy theorist I might think that somebody was watching this blog, and felt the need to put the kibosh on speculation that she was not a resident of Alaska while she was out selling a book that was all about her life in Alaska.

You know, IF I were a conspiracy theorist.