Ho-Ho-Holy crap are we done with this Christmas thing yet?

Merry Christmas and peace on Earth from my family to yours. pic.twitter.com/TYhmJAoTFi

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) December 25, 2015

(Just a family celebrating the conservative tradition of the showing of the firearms to ward off bad spirits and Democrats.)

I know I said earlier today that I love Christmas, and I do. Up to a point.

But right now I am all Jingle Belled the fuck out.

Sure it was fun at first. Visiting the family, opening the presents, bringing up embarrassing stories about my brother's past just to humiliate him.

All good.

But now I'm over it.

For one thing I had to drive all the way out to Palmer, where my mother and brother now live, which meant no holiday beverages. (Uncle Gryphen cannot afford a DUI on his spotless record.)

I'm not saying that drinking alcohol makes every thing better, because everybody already knows that drinking alcohol makes everything better. (Except child rearing of course, not that my father did not give it the old college try.)

Anyhow before I go all Grinch that stole Christmas and harsh everybody's mellow, let me just say that I had a lot of fun today. (You know as much fun as you can have without a drop of alcohol and your brother telling everybody that story about how you used to sing out loud to Bee Gees songs. By the way Too Much Heaven is a classic!)

I got a lot of nice gifts, gave more expensive ones to others so that I looked cool, and enjoyed my visit with my family.

Now I am back home contemplating the upcoming year.

And while I have literally no idea what is in store, I know that it will undoubtedly be a wild ride and I could not imagine a better group of people to share that experience with than all of you.

Happy Holidays! (That's right Fox News I said "Happy Holidays," bite me!)

Something about this blind item seems awfully familiar.

Courtesy of Crazy Days and Nights:

 It is not often that someone manages to leave their hometown and then comes back a huge star and stays. Usually they come home for a week or two and then head off. Not in this case. This is an unusual case. Our star was never more than a celebrity. Not an actress or singer or anything that required actual talent. Despite all that she became an A list celebrity. For a minute or two she was a reality star. A quick couple of shows and then when the flame was bright called it a day and headed back home. She still has a name but just stays in the shadows counting her money and drinking her booze. Why did she go home? To be with her family? That is what the story for consumption is. The real story is more complicated. There was the excessive drug use followed by the embarrassing situation where she was living with two guys at once and they were not all just roommates. There was the partying. There was also the incident with the producer of another show who went a little too far on a date and sexually assaulted our celebrity. All of these things combined to leave her shaken and bruised and so she went home. At home she does not do much. A string of boyfriends that has gone through most of the single population of men in the town. So, most night she sits at home and drinks and then goes out and drinks and then comes home and drinks some more, often with a friend or two in tow or a new pickup or an old flame. This is how she has been for a year or two and right now it looks like she is going to be this way for a very long time.

Now some of the guesses so far are Audrina Partridge, Lauren Conrad, and Trishelle Cannatella and I actually don't know enough about reality television to tell if those are good guesses or not.

However for me only one name sprang to mind.

Make your guess and then join me under the fold.

Pulling back the facade on Sarah Palin and her Wasillabilly family.

Before you start reading this post remember that this is only the information that I can share that does not out my source completely. There is much that is being left for future posts when she decides that she is in a position to reveal her identity.

When that happens all of this will have a far bigger impact. As will what is soon to follow.

As I have shared before the impetus for this source seeking me out was the drunken brawl in Anchorage. When all of that was in its early stages this person was afraid that Palin was about to skate free and decided she simply could not watch that happen yet again.

So as it turned out this person also had an acquaintance that was at the party in Anchorage the night of Throwdown at the Hoedown and I shared that information back in early October.

However after the police audio came out, all of the dust settled, and it became clear that the Palins would NOT face any prosecution, I reached out to my source to tell them that apparently it was up to the two of us to make sure the family did not get away scott free.

That, of course, elicited the response "I'm in."

And after some miscommunication which had me doubting that, it turns out that indeed she is in.

During some of our initial conversations my source made it clear that the behavior captured on audio that night was in NO way new for the family. And in fact heavy drinking and drug use is as common to the Palins as swimming is for fish. (Well except the ones in the lake of theirs. Those just float.)

According to my source the drinking is a learned behavior that the Palin men inherited from their father Jim Palin who, once again according to this very well placed source, was a prestigious drinker with a bad temper. (He also apparently had some problems with the ladies, as he seems to have lost his job with MEA back in the 90's for "sexual harassment." Now why is THAT not surprising?) 

Anyhow Todd and other members of his family seem to have followed in their father's footsteps and developed drinking problems of their own. Apparently a favorite place to indulge is the Petersburg cabin. But when they cannot get there, Todd's garage will do, where, according to my source, the favorite topic of conversation is what a c**t Sarah is.

But of course it is not all just drinking. Also according to the source Todd has a back problem that he treats with liberal doses of Hydrocodone. (In case you're wondering, yes the directions suggest that you avoid drinking alcohol when taking this medication.)

However as we already know drugs are even more of a problem for other members of the Palin family. Like Dianne Palin for instance, who apparently started her breaking and entering career by stealing from various family members first, including Sarah and Todd, though nobody thought to get her any help because, well it wouldn't look good now would it?

And then there is Track, who my source tells me has a crippling problem with substance abuse which seems to only be getting worse. (What you heard on that audio is apparently what Track is like much of the time.)

As for the fighting, well the fighting is also a component of the family dynamic.

There have been multiple knock down drag outs between Sarah and Todd of course. But the one that was new to me was a rather ugly fight that happened between Todd and Bristol back when she was still dating Levi.

Once again according to this source Todd flat out hated Levi's guts, and wanted Bristol to stay away from him. Apparently the argument devolved into a physical altercation which found the two getting all MMA with each other. At one point Todd had Bristol by the hair and was dragging her around with Bristol responding by grabbing him by the crotch. (And here I thought MY family had anger issues.)

Of course as we know Bristol did NOT stop seeing Levi and even conned the poor guy into impregnating her loser ass, so that she could then accuse him of getting her drunk and raping her.

As for Sarah herself my source claims that her decision to quit as Governor of Alaska was nothing new as she had tried to quit just about everything at one time of another.

When she was Mayor of Wasilla she tried to quit in her first term and had to be talked out of it by Jim Palin who told her that she owed a lot of people who had helped get her elected.

She also resigned her position on the Alaska Oil and Gas Conservation Commission, but of course was able to rework that as an ethical choice in response to all of the corruption that she witnessed.

The most famous one was when she quit as Governor. But perhaps the most egregious resignation was from her responsibilities as a parent, leaving Todd and other members of the family to take up the slack.

As it turned out Sarah uses children as part of a barter system with Todd, according to this source.

As I understand it, when Sarah wants to do something, and needs Todd to sign off on it, she births him another baby. According to my source Todd loves kids and by doing that Sarah has managed to get her way a number of times.

Let's break it down shall we?

• Palin was already pregnant with Track so that got Todd to marry her. 
• Bristol was born in 1990, so Sarah was able to run for city council in 1992. 
• Willow was born in 1994 allowing Sarah to run for Mayor in 1995.
• Piper was born in 2001, and Sarah ran for Lt. Governor in 2002.

Yep kind of all works out.

Oddly enough there were no babies before Sarah ran for Governor, but we all sure know what happened right before she was tapped as John McCain's running mate.  Don't we?

I asked my source if there was one thing that she wanted people to know about Sarah Palin, and her answer was that:

"The family is a facade."

As she states it there is no love lost between Todd and Sarah. As for the kids they are deeply troubled and essentially only respond to financial incentives provided to them when Sarah needs them to play their parts.

None of that should be considered all that surprising of course.

We have already seen the daughter whose name was copyrighted so that mom could hire a ghostwriter to play her part for public consumption.

The son whose military "career" was arranged for his mother's political benefit, and whose troubles are covered up with mounds of cash.

The wild child who is kept under lock and key.

The youngest girl who is being groomed as Sarah's little doppelganger.

And of course Trig, the political prop who has almost outlived his usefulness. (Who my source says most certainly did NOT issue forth from Sarah's loins. Though she is not sure where he did come from.)

I cannot say that I found too many of these revelations shocking, however I was surprised that this person was willing to say them publicly.

As for my source well I have already told you that she is going to go public in the near future. What I have NOT told you is that she actually has others from Palin's past that also want to get a few things off their chest, and who may be willing to do so either publicly like their friend, or as anonymous sources who will back up or flesh out the statements from others.

And for my final tidbit I thought I would share with you the fact that my source was made aware of a certain book entitled "Boys Will Be Boys." And though she remains blissfully unaware of Todd's possible side business, she has learned that some of the names mentioned in the book are people who are very familiar to her.

I know right?

So hopefully this post satisfied those of you who waited so patiently these last several months.

Like I said this is only the beginning, and once certain things are straightened out there will be much, much more.

Stay tuned.

Come on Alaska can't we do better than this?

Courtesy of Salon: 

An Alaska Republican is pushing to put free pregnancy tests in bars in order to discourage pregnant people from drinking, but thinks that providing no-cost birth control in the same manner is “social engineering.” 

In an interview with the Anchorage Daily News, state Sen. Pete Kelly explained his dream of putting pregnancy tests in public restrooms thusly: “So if you’re drinking — if you’re out at the big birthday celebration and you’re kind of like, ‘Gee, I wonder if I …,’ You can just go in the bathroom and there should be a plastic, Plexiglas bowl in there [filled with free pregnancy tests.]” 

While I’m not entirely convinced that clubgoers will feel inclined to piss on a stick in the middle of a “big birthday celebration,” I’m definitely in favor of making pregnancy tests free and widely available in places like public restrooms. (A savvy Alaskan would be well served to stash a few of the free tests to have on hand at more convenient, less public moments.) 

But when asked about another sensible reproductive health proposal — making birth control free and widely available — Kelly balked. 

“No, because the thinking is a little opposite. This assumes that if you know, you’ll act responsibly. Birth control is for people who don’t necessarily want to act responsibly,” he explained. “That’s — I’m not going to tell them what to do, or help them do it, that’s their business. But if we have a pregnancy test, because someone just doesn’t know. That’s probably a way we can help them.” 

When the person interviewing Kelly suggested that using birth control may also be responsible, Kelly replied, “Maybe, maybe not. That’s a level of social engineering that we don’t want to get into. All we want to do is make sure that people are informed and they’ll make the right decision.”

So it IS responsible to pee on a stick before drinking in a bar to determine whether or not you are pregnant first, but NOT responsible to use birth control to keep that from happening in the first place?

Okay that's going to kill some brain cells. 

Sometimes there is so much stupid up here that I am afraid to leave my house

Now for something completely different. Perhaps the most chilling safety advertisement I have ever seen.

It is not often that a movie, commercial or short film, gets to me very often. But this one certainly did.

To learn more about this film and why it was made click the Facebook page here.